JNVERS     YO     CALFORNA   SANDIEGC 


3  1822  00210  7704 


'CUL  Anne 
|BJ 

1681 

.W5 

1839 


,«ffim,8E,  ?,ft!,F,?i!ir<i  mffiffi\  \  N 


3  1822  00210  7704 


THE  UN  fV  LIBRARY 

UNIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA,  SAN  DIEGO 

LA  JOLLA,  CALIFORNIA 


ud  take  for  granted, -nor  to  Cind.  taHc  aud  aisi: 


S.H.COLESWORTHY, 


YOUNG  LADY'S  AID, 

TO 
*        * 

USEFULNESS  AND  HAPPINESS. 


BY     JASON     WHITMAN, 

AUTHOR    OF    THE    YOUNG    HAN'S    ASSISTANT, 

SECOND  EDITION, 

IMPROVED    AND    ENLARGED. 


PORTLAND: 

S.    H.    COLES  WORTHY. 
1839. 


Entered  according  to  Act  of  Congress,  in  the  year  1838, 

BY    8.    H.    COLE8WORTHY, 

In  the    Clerk's   Office  of  the   District    Court  of  Maine. 


HUFU8    TUKEY,    PRINTER, 
NO.    23,    EXCHANGE      STREET. 


TO 

THE  YOUNG  LADIES 

or 

THE  PARK-STREET   PARISH, 

PORTLAND,    MAINE, 

THIS    LITTLE    VOLUME, 

ORIGINALLY    PREPARED    FOR    THEIR    GOOD, 
AND    IN    THE    FORM    OF 

LECTURES, 

DELIVERED     IN     THEIR     PRESENCE    I» 
AFFECTIONATELY 

DEDICATED 

BY    THEIR 

FRIEND   AND    PASTOR. 


PREFACE. 


1  am  aware,  that  it  may  seem  to  be  the  very 
height  of  presumption,  to  bring  forward  a  work 
addressed  to  young  ladies,  after  the  excellent  vol- 
umes of  Mrs.  Sigourney  and  Mrs.  Farrar.  But 
I  have  ever  felt  that  the  multiplication  of  books  of 
this  character  is  productive  of  good  rather  than  of 
evil.  My  reasons  are  these.  Every  writer  has 
his  own  way  of  stating  things,  his  peculiar  mode 
of  address,  his  individual  style  of  writing.  Then, 
too,  the  tastes  of  readers  differ  widely.  What  is 
dull  to  one,  may  be  interesting  to  another.  There 
is  hope,  therefore,  that  if  books  aie  multiplied, 
and  the  subjects  are  presented  in  different  modes 
and  styles,  a  greater  variety  of  tastes  will  be  suit- 
ed, and  a  greater  number  of  readers  will  be  inter- 
ested. Then,  too,  it  is  often  the  case,  that  a  book 
is  read  with  interest,  on  account  of  the  acquain- 
tance, which  the  reader  may  have  with  the  writer. 
Every  one  has  his  circle  of  friends  and  acquain- 
tances, within  which,  what  he  may  say  will  be 
eagerly  read  and  particularly  regarded.  I  would 
cherish  the  hope,  therefore,  that  this  little  volume 


VI  PREFACE. 

may  find  readers,  and  may  exert  an  influence 
among  the  friends  and  acquaintances  of  the  writer, 
and  with  those  whose  tastes  may  be  suited,  by  his 
particular  mode  of  address,  notwithstanding  there 
may  be  other  and  better  books  of  a  similar  char- 
acter already  before  the  public. 

This  volume  was  originally  prepared,  as  has 
been  already  hinted,  in  the  form  of  lectures. — 
The  occasion  of  preparing  them  was  simply  this- 
In  the  regular  discharge  of  my  professional  duties, 
I  addressed  a  course  of  lectures  to  the  young  men 
of  my  parish.  It  was  hinted  by  a  respected  fe- 
male friend,  that,  a  similar  course,  addressed  to 
young  ladies,  would  be  acceptable  and  might  be 
the  means  of  some  good.  The  suggestion  was 
accepted  and  acted  upon.  The  lectures  were  giv- 
en on  the  afternoons  of  six  successive  Sabbaths. 
Tbey  were  very  fully  attended,  by  young  ladies 
from  most  of  the  religious  societies  in  the  city  and 
were  listened  to  with  great  apparent  interest.  It 
has  been  suggested  to  me  that  by  publishing  them 
they  might  be  instrumental  of  more  extended 
good. 

In  regard  to  the  matter  and  the  style  of  these 
letters,  1  simply  say,  that  I  have  touched  upon 
those  topics,  which  have  presented  themselves 
most  forcibly  to  my  own  mind,  as  the  topics  upon 
•which  counsel  and  advice  were  most  needed,  and 
that  I  have  written  straight  on,  just  as  thoughts, 


PREFACE.  Vll 

examples  and  illustrations  have  occurred,  labor- 
ing only  to  be  understood  and  felt,  and  not  think- 
ing whether  I  should  subject  myself  to  censure  or 
secure  to  myself  praise. 

I  now  commend  this  little  book  to  the  public,  to 
whose  good  opinion  I  am  not  indifferent,  and  in 
whose  approbation  of  my  efforts  I  should  rejoice. 
I  commend  it  especially  to  that  interesting  and 
most  important  class  of  the  community,  to  whom 
it  is  more  particularly  addressed — the  young  la- 
dies— with  the  hope  that  it  may  be  to  them  truly 
and  in  reality  what  it  is  nominally,  an  aid  to  use- 
fulness and  happiness.  But  above  all  would  I 
commend  this  effort  to  our  heavenly  Father,  with 
the  prayer,  that  he  would  accept  and  bless  what- 
ever in  it  may  be  in  accordance  with  his  will,  and 
forgive  what  in  it  may  not  meet  with  his  approval. 
JASON  WHITMAN. 


THE 


LETTER  I. 

THE    INFLUENCE     OF     CHRISTIANITY     UPON    THE 
CONDITION    OF    FEMALES. 

Introductory  remarks — the  condition  of  females  in  savage 
lands — in  those  semi-civilized — in  Christian  lands — 
reasons  for  instituting  this  comparison — Counsels  and 
advice  should  be  adapted  to  the  condition  in  which  wo- 
men are  to  be  placed;  Christianity  regards  woman  as  an 
individual  spiritual  being  before  God — dependent  up- 
on and  accountable  to  him — This  the  essential  distinc- 
tion and  the  essential  relation — This  thought  will  fill 
woman  with  self-respect — It  will  lead  her  to  such 
courses  of  conduct  and  such  pursuits  of  study  as  will 
render  her  worthy  of  the  respect  of  others. 

MY  YOUNG  FRIENDS: — 

The  peculiar  situations     in    which  I   have 
been  placed  in  life,  as  a  teacher,  with  young 


JO  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

ladies  under  my  instruction,  and,  then,  as  a 
minister  of  the  gospel,  have  afforded  me  op- 
portunities for  observing  the  peculiar  dangers 
to  which  you  are  exposed;  and  have  excited 
within  me  deep  feelings  of  interest  in  your  wel- 
fare. I  have,  for  a  long  time  wished  to  see 
you  aiming  more  constantly  at  usefulness,  in 
the  highest  and  best  sense  of  that  term,  as  the 
direct  road  to  happiness.  And  I  have  felt  de- 
sirous of  doing  what  little  might  be  in  my  pow- 
er, to  aid  you  in  your  endeavors  to  become 
useful  and  happy.  I  have,  therefore,  determin- 
ed to  address  you  in  a  series  of  letters.  I  shall 
not  speak  as  an  admirer  of  female  beauty  and 
female  charms,  and  fill  my  letters  with  fulsome 
flattery.  The  deep  and  heartfelt  respect 
which  I  entertain  for  you,  forbids  it.  Nor  shall 
1  speak  to  you,  simply  as  a  Christian  minis- 
ter, in  the  measured  stiffness  of  official  dignity, 
authority  or  reserve.  No  my  friends,  I  de- 
sire to  lay  aside  every  thing  which  may  pre- 
vent my  speaking  to  you  with  the  same  free- 
dom, directness  and  particularity,  with  which 
1  should  address  an  own  and  much  loved 
sister.  And  I  wish  you  to  regard  the  sugges- 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  11 

tions,  which  I  may  offer,  not  merely  as  the 
cold  dictates  of  official  duty,  but  as  the  warmer 
promptings  of  fraternal  affection.  I  would  ap- 
proach you  as  a  brother — I  would  speak  to  you 
as  to  sisters.  But,  while  I  would  lay  aside  my 
official  character,  I  cannot  forget  my  Christian 
solicitudes.  While  I  would  speak  to  you  as  a 
brother,  I  beg  you  to  bear  it  in  mind,  that  it 
is  as  a  Christian  brother  that  I  speak; — for,  if 
Christianity  be  regarded  as  the  living  and  eter- 
nal truth  of  God,  and  be  allowed  to  reach  the 
heart,  it  will  affect  our  feelings,  most  deeply 
and  distinctly,  in  regard  to  those  who  are  near 
and  dear  to  us.  Does  the  Christian  pray  for 
the  salvation  of  heathen  nations?  And  does 
he  not  pray,  with  tenfold  more  earnestness  for 
the  salvation  of  those  near  and  dear  to  him — 
of  parents,  brothers,  sisters,  wife,  children? 
You  will  not,  then,  think  it  strange  that,  in 
speaking  to  you  as  a  brother,  I  may  suffer  my- 
self to  be  controlled  by  my  Christian  solicitude 
for  your  spiritual  good. 

I  have  thus,  my  young  friends,  introduced 
myself  to  your  acquaintance,  and  explained  to 
you  the  feelings,  desires  and  intentions,  with 


12  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

which  I  commenced  this  series  of  letters  ;  and 
now,  I  would  ask  you  to  pause  and  look  at 
yourselves,  to  consider  carefully  the  peculiar- 
ities of  the  situation  in  which  you  are  placed, 
to  inquire  for  the  causes  which  have  produced 
these  peculiarities,  and  for  the  duties  which 
spring  from  them.  And  you  will  be  the  bet- 
ter enabled  to  do  this,  if  you  will  first  inquire 
into  the  situation  of  females  in  other  times  and 
other  lands.  As  you  pursue  this  inquiry,  you 
will  find,  that,  in  many  nations,  woman  has 
been  regarded  as  the  slave  or  the  play  thing 
of  man;  you  will  find  too,  that  in  some  na- 
tions, she  is  even  now  so  regarded.  Among 
savage  nations,  woman  is  in  reality  only  a  slave. 
She  must  bear  burdens,  and  endure  fatigues 
in  obedience  to  her  lord  and  master,  the  hus- 
band. The  husband  will  pass  his  days  in  sport 
or  idleness,  while  the  wife  is  employed  in  hard 
and  wearing  labor.  Among  such  nations,  man 
seems  to  look  upon  woman  as  created  for  him, 
for  his  use  and  pleasure.  Such  is  the  condition 
of  woman  among  savage  nations. 

There  are  other  nations,  more  nearly  civi- 
lized, where  the  condition  of  woman  is  differ-. 


BLESSINGS    OF   CHRISTIANITY.  13 

ent,  where  she  is  suffered  to  live  in  compara- 
tive idleness,  where  she  is  gaily  decked  out 
and  fondly  caressed.  But  among  these  she  is 
regarded  as  a  mere  toy  or  play  thing.  Like 
the  child's  doll,  she  may  be  carefully  preser- 
ved and  beautifully  adorned,  but  still  preser- 
ved and  adorned,  only  as  a  doll,  only  as  a  gild- 
ed play  thing,  which  may  serve  as  a  source 
of  temporary  pleasure.  Such  is  the  condition 
of  woman  in  some  lands?  she  lives,  and  adorns 
her  person,  and  cultivates  her  charms  that  so 
she  may  be  the  more  acceptable  as  a  toy,  or 
may  the  more  readily  excite  the  passions  she 
must  gratify.  Then  there  are  other  lands,  like 
our  own,  which  are  civilized  and  christianized, 
and  what  is  the  condition  of  woman  in  these? 
Here,  she  is  regarded,  not  as  the  slave,  not  as 
the  play  thing,  but  as  the  equal  and  companion 
of  man.  Man  looks  to  her,  not  merely  for 
service,  not  solely  for  pleasure.  He  looks  to 
her  for  sympathy  and  counsel.  He  does  not 
command  her  as  a  superior  but  speaks  to  her 
as  to  an  equal.  Is  the  husband  in  indigent 
circumstances?  He  does,  indeed,  expect 
the  wife  to  struggle  with  him  against  the  evils 

2 


14  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

of  poverty.     And  he  hopes  to  be  himself  ani- 
mated to  still  more  resolute  exertions,  by  the 
cheerfulness  and  resolution    with  which  she 
may  struggle.     Is  the  husband  rich?    He  ex- 
pects to  find,  in  the  wife,  one  who  will  coun- 
sel and  advise,  in  regard  to  the  best  mode  of 
employing  the  riches  which  God  has  bestow- 
ed; one,  who  will  aid  him  in  doing  good  accor- 
ding to  the  extent  of  his  means.   Is  man  placed 
on  a  bed  of  sickness?  The  attentions  of  none 
are  so  soothing  as  those  of  woman,  those  of  a 
mother,  a  daughter,  a  sister,  or  a  wife.      At 
such  times  man  locks  to  woman  not  merely 
as  an  equal,  but  as  a  superior.     He  is  almost 
inclined  to  regard  her  as  an  'angel  of  mercy,' 
at  least  as  a  'sister  of  charity,'  and  superior  to 
himself  in  her  capacity  for  charitable  deeds. 
But  why,  you  may  ask,  is  it  necessary  or 
important  to  bring  these  different  conditions 
of  woman  into  view  by  way  of  contrast?  I  an- 
swer, that  counsel  and  advice,  in  order  to  be 
appropriate  and  useful,  should  be  adapted  to 
the  condition  of  those  to  whom  it  is  addressed. 
If  woman  is  to  be  the  slave  of  man,  to  perform 
labors  and  bear  burdens  at  his  command,  then 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  15 

she  should  prepare  herself,  while  young,  for 
lier  future  labors  by  such  a  course  of  exercise 
and  effort,  as  will  produce  physical  develop- 
ment and  bodily  strength.  Under  such  cir- 
cumstances and  with  such  prospects  the  coun- 
sels and  advice  given  should  have  principal  re- 
ference to  this  point.  So,  too,  if  woman  is  to 
be  the  mere  toy  and  play  thing  of  man,  living 
only  to  afford  him  pleasure,  or  to  gratify 
his  passions,  then  should  she  qualify  herself 
for  this  condition  by  seeking  in  early  years  an 
acquaintance  with  those  arts  and  personal  em- 
bellishments, which  are  calculated  to  make 
her  a  more  accomplished  and  acceptable  toy. 
Under  such  circumstances  and  with  such 
prospects,  the  counsels  given  should  have  ref- 
erence to  this  kind  of  preparation.  But  if  wo- 
man is  to  be  the  equal,  the  companion,  the 
counsellor  of  man,  then  should  her  early  edu- 
cation and  training  have  reference  to  these  pe- 
culiarities in  her  condition.  And,  where  man 
is  enlightened  and  refined,  there  must  womwi 
also  be  enlightened  and  refined,  that  she  may 
be  truly  equal  and  capable  of  companionship. 
You  will  perceive,  at  once,  that,  in  the  latter 


16  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

case,  the  education  necessary  will  be  more 
various,  extensive  and  difficult,  than  in  the 
former.  In  the  former  cases,  man  seeks  the 
company  of  woman  only  at  particular  times, 
when  he  wishes  for  her  labor  and  service,  or 
when  he  would  amuse  himself  with  her  as  a 
toy.  But,  in  the  latter  case,  there  is  no  state 
of  mind,  in  which  man  does  not  seek  the  so- 
ciety of  woman.  Does  lie  rejoice?  He  would 
share  his  joys  with  some  beloved  female. 
Does  he  weep?  His  tears  are  wiped  away 
by  the  delicate  hand  of  a  mother,  or  a  daugh- 
ter, a  sister  or  a  wife.  Is  the  husband  in 
doubt,  in  perplexity,  in  distress?  Does  he 
not  go  to  the  wife  of  his  bosom  for  advice,  for 
counsel,  for  sympathy,  lor  encouragement? 
Consequently,  woman  should  be  prepared  to 
meet  all  these  various  calls.  The  mind,  then, 
should  be  informed  and  the  judgment  matur- 
ed, that  she  may  be  qualified  to  give  counsel. 
The  sympathies  should  be  awakened,  the  feel- 
iqgs  cultivated  and  the  affections  trained,  that 
so  she  may  enter  into  the  feelings,  draw  forth 
the  sympathies,  and  enlist  the  affections  ot 
those  she  would  counsel;  that  so  she  may 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  17 

corne  to  man, not  as  a  superior  being  to  reprove 
or  instruct  merely,  but  as  an  equal,  to  share 
with  him  his  various  fortunes.  And  then,  too, 
the  energies  should  be  aroused  and  develop- 
ed, that  so  she  may  be  herself  enabled  to  bear 
up  cheerfully  and  to  cheer  and  encourage  her 
companion  under  trial  and  difficulty.  Such, 
I  say,  should  be  the  early  training  of  one,  who 
is  to  be  the  companion  and  counsellor  of  edu- 
cated and  enlightened  man.  How  various, 
how  extensive,  how  difficult  the  task.  I  have 
alluded,  then,  to  these  differences  in  the  con- 
dition of  woman,  in  order  that  you  may  under- 
stand the  reason  and  the  object  of  my  counsels. 
For  it  will  be  my  endeavor  to  give  such,  as  are 
calculated  to  prepare  you  for  the  peculiar  cir- 
cumstances of  your  future  condition;  such  as 
are  calculated  to  prepare  you  to  be  in  reality 
and  truly  the  companions  and  counsellors  of 
man.  I  have  alluded  to  these  differences  in 
the  condition  of  woman  for  another  reason;  I 
wish  you  to  understand  the  principle  involved 
in  this  difference,  to  know,  not  merely  that 
there  is  a  difference,  but  why  this  difference 
exists;  the  causes  which  have  produced  it.  And 


18  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

on  this  point,  I  would  observe,  that,  upon 
examination,  you  will  find  that  there  is  a  mar- 
ked and  striking  difference  between  the  condi- 
tion of  woman  in  Christian  and  unchristian  lands. 
There  may  be,  end  there  undoubtedly  are, 
great  differences  in  the  condition  of  woman  in 
lands  not  Christian,  and  in  some  they  may  be 
more' elevated  than  in  others.  So  too  there 
may  be,  and  there  undoubtedly  is  a  great  di- 
versity in  the  condition  of  woman  in  different 
Christian  lands.  Jn  some  they  may  be  more 
degraded  than  in  others.  But  these  are  only 
differences  in  modes  and  degrees;  they  are 
not  differences  in  principle.  Between  Chris- 
tian lands  and  those  not  Christian  the  differ- 
ence is  one  of  principle.  And  what  is  this 
difference  of  principle?  It  is  this.  Inlands 
not  Christian  woman  is  regarded  only  as  an  ap- 
pendage of  man,  as  created  for  his  use  and 
pleasure.  The  estimation  in  which  she  is 
held,  and  the  condition  in  which  she  is  plac- 
ed, depend  only  upon  the  different  opinions, 
which  may  prevail  in  regard  to  her  appropri- 
ate sphere,  either  as  a  servant  of  labor  or  as  a 
minister  of  pleasure.  She  is  not  regarded  as 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITV.  19 

an  independent  individual  creation,  of  intrin- 
sic worth  in  herself;  but  simply  as  an'  appen- 
dage of  man,  living,  laboring,  studying  the  arts 
of  pleasing  with  a  view  to  the  service,  or  to* 
the  gratification  of  man.  Such  is  the  peculiar- 
ity of  the  prevalent  opinions  in  regard  to  wo- 
man in  lands  not  Christian.  There  may  be 
slight  differences  in  the  mode  in  which  she  is 
treated.  The  savage  rnny  make  woman  but  a 
substitute  for  a  beast  of  burden.  The  Turk, 
with  his  seraglio,  may  regard  her  as  a  toy,  val- 
uable indeed,  but  still  a  toy.  But  the  princi- 
ple with  both  is  the  same.  They  both  re- 
gard woman  as  the  appendage  of  man.  In 
Christian  lands  the  case  is  far  different. — 
Christianity  addresses  woman  as  an  individual, 
a  spiritual  being,  possessing  powers,  and  ca- 
pacities, involved  in  responsibilities,  capable 
of  happiness;  a  being  of  real,  intrinsic  and  eter- 
nal worth,  in  herself,  and  without  dependence 
upon  man.  Christianity  connects  woman  di- 
rectly with  the  throne  of  God,  and  teaches 
that  she  is  no  more  to  be  regarded  as  an  ap- 
pendage of  man  than  man  is  to  be  regarded  as 
an  appendage  of  woman.  Christianity  does 


~U  YOUNG    LADY  S    AID. 

indeed  recognize  the  relations,  in  which  wo- 
man is  placed.  It  regards  her  as  sustaining 
to  man  the  relation  of  daughter,  sister,  wife 
and  mother;  and  enforces,  with  sanctions  the 
most  solemn,  the  obligations  and  duties  of 
these  relations.  But  she  places  man  and  wo- 
man on  an  equality  before  God.  If  she  says  to 
wives  'submit  yourselves  to  your  own  hus- 
bands,' she  is  only  pointing  out  a  duty,  which 
springs  from  a  peculiar  relation.  She  does 
not  say  woman  submit  to  man.  She  only 
says. having  entered  a  peculiar  relation  in  which 
it  is  necessary  that  there  should  be  one  and 
only  one  head,  you  must  yield  all  proper  sub- 
mission to  this  head.  This  then  is  the  prin- 
ciple, the  peculiarity  of  the  view,  with  which 
woman  is  regarded  and  addressed  by  Christi- 
anity. She  is  addressed  as  an  individual  im- 
mortal spirit,  looking  not  to  man,  but  to  God, 
as  the  being  with  whom  she  is  directly  con- 
nected, and  for  whose  service  and  glory  she 
was  created. 

Indeed  Christianity  looks  upon  us  all,  in 
one  and  the  same  light,  as  individual  spirits  be- 
fore God,  dependent  upon,  and  accountable  to 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  21 

him.  But,  at  the  same  time,  it  regards  us  as 
spirits,  sustaining  towards  each  other  certain 
relations,  out  of  which  grow  certain  duties,  by 
the  faithful  performance  of  which  our  mutual 
improvement  may  be  promoted  and  our  mutu- 
al happiness  secured.  It  speaks  to  us  all,  I 
repeat,  as  individual  spirits  before  God,  de- 
pendent upon,  and  accountable  lo  him.  This 
is  the  one  unchangeable  view,  which  Christian- 
ity takes  of  us,  and  it  teaches  us  that  this  is 
the  one  unchangeable  view  which  we  should 
take  of  ourselves.  The  relations  of  life  may 
vary,  the  circumstances  and  condition  of  our 
being  may  vary,  but  this  peculiarity,  that  we 
are  spiritual  be.ings,  and  this  relation  to  God, 
as  dependent  and  accountable  beings,  must  al- 
ways remain. 

And  this  is  the  view,  my  young  friends, 
which  Christianity  takes  of  you.  It  regards 
you  as  individual,  immortal  spirits  before  God, 
his  children,  dependent  upon,  and  accountable 
to  him.  It  has  seen  you  children,  it  now  sees 
you  young  ladies,  it  may  hereafter  see  you 
wives  and  mothers,  it  follows  you  through  all 
these  relations,  as  immortal  spirits.  With  every 


*2~2  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

variation  in  your  relations,  your  duties  wilt 
vary.  But  you  will  retain  through  them  all 
your  essential  characteristic,  as  immortal  spir- 
its, your  essential  relation  as  dependent  upon 
an:l  accountable  to  God.  And  so  too,  Christi- 
anity may  follow  you  through  the  various  chang- 
es of  life.  It  may  see  you  in  circumstances 
of  wealth,  or  in  those  of  poverty,  in  the  en- 
joyment of  bodily  health,  or  visited  by  bodily 
disease;  as  the  mistress  of  your  mansion,  or  as 
domestics  in  the  same.  But  in  all  these  vari- 
ations of  condition  and  circumstance,  it  looks 
upon  you  as  still  immortal  spirits,  and  regards 
all  these  variations  as  the  means  appointed  by 
God  for  the  growth,  development  and  im- 
provement of  the  spirit.  And  now  my  young 
friends  I  wish  you  would  look  upon  yourselves 
in  this  light.  Ever  regard  yourselves  as  im- 
Diortal  spirits  before  God,  capable  of  spiritu- 
al improvement  and  spiritual  happiness,  as 
dependent  upon  and  accountable  to  him. — 
Ever  regard  all  the  relations,  all  the  circum- 
stances, all  the  duties,  and  all  the  trials  of  life, 
but  as  so  many  temporary  arrangements,  ap- 
pointed by  God  lor  your  spiritual  improve- 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  23 

ment.  Fix  your  thoughts  then  not  upon  these 
temporary  arrangements,  but  upon  your  essen- 
tial characteristic,  your  essential  relation. — 
I  have  thus  pointed  out  what  I  regard  as  the 
foundation  of  the  peculiar  condition  of  woman 
in  Christian  lands.  The  more  fully  these  views 
are  brought  home  to  the  feelings,  the  more 
will  woman  be  elevated  and  refined;  the  more 
will  she  be  respected  and  esteemed;  the  more 
fully  will  she  become  the  companion  and  the 
counsellor  of  man.  But  why  so,  you  will  ask? 
I  answer,  that  woman  will  learn,  from  this 
view  to  respect  and  value  herself,  and  to  base 
her  self-respect  upon  right  grounds.  She  will 
respect  herself  for  what  she  is,  as  created  by 
God,  for  her  intellectual,  moral  and  spiritual 
capacities.  She  will  respect  herself,  on  ac- 
count of  the  relation  which  she  sustains  to  the 
all  perfect  Jehovah,  as  his  child.  She  will 
respect  herself  on  account  of  the  glorious  des- 
tiny which  is  before  her,  an  eternal  and  spir- 
itual life  beyond  the  grave.  She  will  look, 
with  deep  and  heartfelt  reverence  upon  that 
nature,  which  comes  from  the  hands  of  God  , 
which  is  capable  of  loving  and  serving  and 


24  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

holding  communion  with  God,  and  which,  if 
through  the  power  of  Christian  truth  and  the 
influences  of  God's  spirit  it  be  developed 
aright,  is  to  enjoy  eternal  blessedness  in  the 
presence  of  God  and  the  Savior,  in  company 
with  holy  angels  and  the  spirits  of  the  just 
made  perfect.  And  this  her  self-respect,  bas- 
ed as  it  will  be  upon  these  grounds,  will  exert 
an  influence  upon  all  her  tastes,  upon  all  her 
pursuits,  upon  her  whole  character.  Will  she, 
who  feels  that  she  is  a  spiritual  being,  depen- 
dent upon,  accountable  to  God,  destined  to 
an  eternal,  spiritual  life  beyond  the  grave,  will 
such  a  one,  I  ask,  have  a  taste  for  vanity  and 
frivolity?  And  will  such  a  one  spend  her  time 
in  studying  and  arranging  the  various  forms  of 
dress,  the  various  rules  and  laws  of  fashion,  to 
the  neglect  of  her  spiritual  cultivation,  to  the 
forgetfulness  of  her  eternal  destiny?  Will  she 
not,  on  the  contrary,  be  carried  by  her  very 
self-respect,  and  by  the  tastes  naturally  spring- 
ing from  that  self-respect,  to  pursuits  more 
solid  and  substantial?  Will  such  a  one  strive 
solely  to  please  man,  will  she  not  strive  prin- 
cipally to  please  God.  Most  surely  she  will. 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  25 

And,  under  the  influence  of  these  views,  her 
very  tastes  will  lead  her  to  those  pursuits  and 
studies,  which  are  solid  and  substantial  and 
which  give  stability  to  character  and  secure 
respect.  Thus  you  perceive,  that,  if  woman 
looks  upon  herself,  through  the  medium  of 
Christianity,  she  will  be  almost  necessarily  and 
unavoidably  led  to  seek  for  such  acquisitions 
and  to  pursue  such  courses  of  conduct,  as  will 
render  her  worthy  of  respect.  But,  still  fur- 
ther, man  will  regard  woman  with  greater  res- 
pect and  will  treat  her  with  greater  reverence, 
when  he  looks  upon  her  through  the  Christian 
medium.  He  will  see  in  her,  not  a  mere  play 
thing,  not  a  mere  slave,  but  an  immortal  soul, 
capable  of  indefinite  progress  in  spiritual  im- 
provement. He  will  reverence  her  for  what  she 
is,  and  is  capable  of  becoming.  His  reverence 
for  her  spiritual  nature  will  exert  a  powerful 
influence  upon  his  manner  of  treating  her. — 
Will  one,  who  regards  woman  as  an  immortal 
spirit,  subject  her  to  all  the  labors  and  endur- 
ances of  a  beast  of  burden?  Oh,  no.  Will 
he  consent  that  she  should  be  a  mere  slave? 
Most  surely  not.  Will  he  treat  her  only  as  a 

3 


26  YOUNG  LADY'S  ATD. 

toy,  for  occasional  trifling  and  amusement,  or 
regard  her  only  as  the  means  of  gratifying  pas- 
sions?    It  cannot  be.     His  reverence  for  her 
essential  characteristic  and  her  essential  rela- 
tion will  forbid  it.   He  may  see  woman    deba- 
sed, degraded,   and,    in  the  greatest    degree, 
loathsome  in  her  appearance,    or  he  may  see 
her  the  most  light  and  trifling  of  creation,  deck- 
ed out  in  all  the    gaudy  display  of  worthless 
finery.     But   his  feelings  will,  in  both  cases, 
and  in  all  similar  cases,  be  only  those  of  pity. 
He  may  mourn  over  her  perversion  of  her  high 
capacities.     But  he  will  still  be  filled  with  the 
deepest  respect  for  the  tendencies  of  her  na- 
ture.    He   will  strive  to  reclaim  her,  to  save 
her,  to  bring  her  back  from  her   degradation 
and  folly  to  a  correct  view  of  her    immortal 
relations.     You   perceive,  therefore,  that  the 
li^ht,  in  which  Christianity  presents  woman,  is 
well  calculated,  not  only  to  fill  woman  herself 
with  self-respect,  and  to  lead  her  to  acquisi- 
tions and  pursuits   which  will  secure   the   re- 
spect of  others,  but  that  it  is  well  calculated 
o  cause  man  to  look  upon  her  with  deep  and 
heartfelt  reverence,  for  the  native  tendencies 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  27 

of  her  soul.  You  see  then,  my  young  friends, 
how  it  is  and  why  it  is,  that  in  Christian  lands 
the  condition  of  woman  is  so  far  elevated 
above  what  it  is  in  lands  where  the  sun  of 
righteousness  has  never  dawned. 

You  have  now  seen,  young  ladies,  what 
Christianity  has  done  for  you.  It  has  set  you 
free  from  the  degrading  idea  that  you  are  the 
mere  appendages  of  man,  created  for  his  ser- 
vice and  bound  to  make  it  the  object  of  your 
life  to  please  him.  It  has  placed  you  on  a  level 
with  every  other  human  being,  as  immortal 
spirits,  bound  most  closely  to  the  throne  of 
the  everlasting  Jehovah,  standing  side  by  side 
with  your  fellow  beings,  not  subjected  to  them, 
but  on  an  equality  with  them,  sustaining  to 
them  certain  relations,  out  of  which  grow  cer- 
tain duties.  It  has  raised  you  from  the  con- 
dition of  slaves  or  play  things  to  that  of  friends, 
counsellors  and  supporters  of  your  fellow  be- 
ings. It  may  be  that,  your  father  or  guar- 
dian may  make  no  pretensions  to  personal  re- 
ligion. Still,  I  say,  that  it  is  to  Christianity 
that  you  are  indebted  for  most  of  your  pecu- 
liar privileges.  Your  father  or  your  guardian, 


^O  \OUNG' LADY S    AID. 

if  not  devoted  personal  Christians  themselves, 
live  in  a  Christian  land,  in  Christian  society  and 
under  the  splendors  of  the  noonday  rays  of  the 
sun  of  righteousness.  He  cannot  divest  him- 
self of  the  influences  by  which  he  is  ever 
surrounded,  and  which  press  upon  hirn  from 
all  sides,  like  the  pressure  of  the  atmosphere 
upon  his  hody.  He  cannot  go  counter  to  the 
practices  which  every  where  prevail,  and 
which,  with  most,  are  all  powerful.  If,  then, 
your  father  or  your  guardian  be  not  himself  a 
devoted  personal  Christian,  still  he  gives  you 
a  Christian  education,  he  treats  you  with  Chris- 
tian kindness.  And  so  of  all  around  you. — 
They  treat  you  with  Christian  respect.  For 
they  are  subjected  to  the  general  influences  of 
Christianity,  which  are  every  where  around. 
You  perceive  then,  I  repeat,  what  Christian- 
ity has  done  for  you.  It  has  revealed  you  to 
yourselves  and  excited  within  you  feelings  of 
self-respect.  It  has  shed  a  light  upon  your 
natures,  which  lias  caused  you  to  be  respected 
and  reverenced  by  others.  I  do  not  mean 
that  Christianity  has  actually  done  all  this,  in 
every  instance.  But  1  do  mean  that,  \vher- 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  29 

ever  its  full  power  is  felt  and  its  true  spirit 
has  been  imbibed,  it  has  done  this.  I  do  mean 
that,  the  more  fully  you  may  yourselves  feel 
the  power  of  Christianity  upon  your  hearts, 
the  more  will  you  respect  and  reverence  your- 
selves; the  more  careful  will  you  be,  in  all 
your  pursuits,  to  select  those  which  are  solid, 
substantial  and  improving;  and  consequently 
the  more  worthy  will  you  become  of  the  re- 
spect and  esteem  of  others.  I  do  mean,  still 
further,  that  the  more  fully  the  power  of  Chris- 
tian truth  is  felt  in  the  community,  and  the 
more  entirely  the  spirit  of  Christianity  prevails, 
the  greater  will  be  the  respect  and  kindness, 
with  which  woman  will  be  treated.  You  see 
then,  I  repeat  still  again,  what  Christianity 
has  done  for  you.  Nay  more,  you  can,  at 
the  same  time,  perceive  what  she  is  capable 
of  doing  for  you,  if  you  will  but  yield  to  her 
claims,  and  her  influences. 


L  E  T  T  E  R    II. 

THE  REQUIREMENTS  OF  CHRISTIANITY  AT  THE 
HAND      OF  FEMALE-. 

Recapitulation  of  the  topics  of  the  preceding  letter — 
The  general  subject  of  this  and  the  succeeding  letters 
stated — Christianity  makes  two  requests — that  we 
should  become  ourselves  truly  Christian — and  strive 
to  make  others  truly  Christian — She  asks,  particularly 
that  all  should  give  her  their  hearts — This  request  in 
accordance  with  our  natures — If  the  affections  are  not 
fixed  upon  some  worthy  object,  they  will  fasten  them- 
selves upon  what  is  unworthy — if  they  are  not  di- 
rected to  some  engrossing  object,  the  individual  may 
become  listless  and  unhappy — The  difference  between 
ladies  and  gentlemen  in  this  respect — Christianity  asks 
in  the  second  place,  that  her  votaries  should  engage 
in  a  course  of  moral  and  religious  self-cultivation — 
This  illustrated — the  cultivation  of  amiability  of  dis- 
position— The  cultivation  of  contentedness  of  feeling 
— The  mistake  that  the  various  qualities  of  a  religious 
character  are  the  result  of  natural  disposition  or  of 
special  influence  corrected — The  mistake  that  we 
should  wait  to  be  irresistibly  moved  to  become  reli- 
gious, corrected — The  importance  of  beginning  im- 
mediately and  of  cherishing  the  slightest  serious  im- 
pressions urged — conclusion. 


BLESSINGS  OF  CHRISTIANITY.          31 

MY  YOUNG  FRIENDS: 

In  my  last  letter,  I  endeavored  to  awaken 
you  to  a  full  view  of  what  Christianity  had  done 
for  you.  And  especially,  I  endeavored  to 
point  out  to  you  the  light,  in  which  she  has 
revealed  you  to  yourselves;  as  marked  by  the 
essential  characteristic  of  immortal  spirits,  as 
sustaining  the  essential  relation  of  dependence 
upon  and  accountability  to  God.  I  endeavor- 
ed also  to  point  out  to  you  the  influence,  which 
this  view  might  be  expected  to  have,  and  which 
it  ought  to  have  upon  your  own  feelings  and 
pursuits,  and  upon  the  esteem  in  which  you 
might  be  held  by  man  and  the  treatment  which 
you  might  receive  at  his  hands. 

In  this  letter  I  shall  speak  directly  and  par- 
ticularly of  what  Christianity  requires  of  you. 
And  my  first  remark  is,  that  Christianity  makes 
two  distinct  general  requests  of  each  one  of 
you.  '  In  the  first  place,  she  asks  that  you 
would,  each  one  of  you,  fashion  your  own  char- 
acters upon  her  model,  and  would  strive  to  bring 
yourselves,  in  all  respects,  into  a  conformity 
with  her  principles  and  her  spirit.  In  the  se- 
cond place,  she  asks  that  you  would  each  of 


32  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

you,  in  your  own  appropriate  spheres,  and  in 
the  way  most  becoming  and  proper,  exert  your 
influence  to  promote  the  increased  power,  and 
the  wider  spread  of  these  same  principles,  the 
more  universal  prevalence  of  this  spirit.  Do 
you  ask  how  you  can  best  meet  and  comply 
with  these  requisitions?  how  you  can  yourselves 
become  truly  Christian,  and  how  you  can  exert 
an  influence  to  make  others  truly  Christian? — 
1  answer,  that  it  will  be  my  object,  in  this  se- 
ries of  letters,  to  point  out  more  particularly 
the  way  in  which  you  can  comply  with  these 
two  general  requisitions  of  Christianity. 

And,  first,  I  remark  that  Christianity  asks, 
more  particularly,  lhat  you  should  give  her  your 
hearts.  She  regards  you,  as  possessing  the  pur- 
est and  most  ardent  affections.  But  she  sees 
you  in  danger  of  ruin,  social,  intellectual  and 
moral  ruin,  through  the  instrumentality  of  these 
very  affections,  for  she  sees  them  in  danger  of 
being  perverted,  of  becoming  depraved.  She 
is  unwilling  that  they  should  be  fastened  su- 
premely upon  any  thing,  other  than  the  high- 
est, purest  and  holiest  objects.  She  is  unwil- 
ling that  you  should  set  your  affections  supreme- 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  33 

ly  upon  social  enjoyment,  upon  intellectual  cul- 
tivation, or  even  upon  mere  moral  improvement. 
She  would  not  have  you  disregard  these  things. 
But  she  would  have  you  regard  spiritual  or  re- 
ligious improvement,  as  the  one  great  object  of 
life?  she  would  have  you  set  your  affections  up- 
on the  spiritual  enjoyments  of  another  -world, 
as  the  supreme  object  of  desire,  the  great  end 
to  be  sought.  Having  directed  the  attention 
to  these,  religious  improvement  in  this  life,  and 
to  religious  enjoyment  in  the  world  to  come, 
and  fixed  the  affections  upon  them,  as  the  end 
of  desire  and  of  effort,  she  teaches  that  social, 
intellectual  and  moral  improvement  and  enjoy- 
ment are  to  be  sought,  as  subsidiary  to  and  in- 
strumental of  spiritual  progress.  Religious  or 
spiritual  improvement,  then,  should  be  the  one 
grand,  all-absorbing  object  of  desire  and  effort. 
All  else  is  to  be  viewed  as  subsidiary  to  this,  all 
else  is  to  be  estimated  by  the  character  of  its 
influence  upon  this;  upon  religious  or  spiritual 
improvement,  upon  a  right  preparation  for  the 
enjoyment  of  religious  or  spiritual  happiness  be- 
yond the  grave.  Christianity  permits  you  to 
love  all  things  which  are  pure  and  innocent, 


34  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

in  different  degrees,  according  to  their  different 
degrees  of  real  worth.  But  she  asks  that  you 
should  love  her  and  the  objects  which  she  pre- 
sents to  your  notice,  with  all  the  strength  of 
your  most  ardent  affections.  She  asks  that  you 
would  give  her  your  hearts,  that  you  would 
give  her  yourselves,  yield  yourselves  up  to  be 
moulded  and  fashioned  in  all  your  habits  of 
thought,  feeling  and  desire,  in  all  your  words 
and  actions",  by  her  instructions.  She  asks  that 
you  would  love  her  supremely  and  serve  her 
devotedly.  Such,  my  young  friends,  is  the  first 
request  of  Christianity,  at  your  hands.  She  will 
accept  of  no  partial  devotion,  of  no  divided  af- 
fections. To  become,  in  all  respects,  what 
Christianity  requires  you  to  be,  must  be,  with 
each  one  of  you,  the  supreme  object  of  desire 
and  of  effort. 

And  this  request  is  reasonable.  It  is  in  ac- 
cordance with  the  demands  of  your  own  na- 
tures. For,  unless  the  affections  become  en- 
grossingly  fixed  upon  some  worthy  object,  there 
is  great  danger  that  they  will  either  attach  them- 
selves to  some  inferior  and  unworthy  object, 
perhaps  even  to  what  is  absurd  and  ridiculous, 


BLESSINGS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.  35 

or  will  wither  away,  leaving  the  individual  to 
become  entirely  and  disgustingly  selfish.  Have 
there  not  been,  I  ask,  ladies,  who,  to  all  human 
appearances,  have  become  entirely  absorbed  in 
their  devotion  to  a  lap  dog,  manifesting  an  al- 
most maternal  anxiety  for  its  comfort,  spending 
much  of  that  most  precious  of  all  earthly  pos- 
sessions, time,  in  childishly  watching  and  tend- 
ing the  animal?  And  yet  these  claimed  to  be 
Ladies,  possessed  of  immortal  spirits,  of  heaven 
born  affections!  Ladies,  possessed  of  reason 
and  conscience!  Must  not  every  one  exclaim , 
at  the  sight,  at  the  very  thought  of  such  a  per- 
son, oh  how  perverted,  how  debased  her  affec- 
tions! I  have  taken  an  extreme  case.  But  it 
shows  the  tendency  of  the  affections  of  the  hu- 
man heart,  if  not  directed  to  elevated  and  wor- 
thy objects,  to  descend  and  fasten  themselves 
upon  those  which  are  low  and  unworthy. 

Nor  am  I  certain  that  there  are  not  many 
corresponding  cases  in  female  society.  Is  it 
not  often  the  case,  that  ladies,  and  young  ladies 
in  particular,  permit  their  affections  to  become 
fixed  upon  the  vanities  of  dress  and  fashion?  Is 
it  not  sometimes  the  case  that  they  are  rendered 


36  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

miserably  unhappy,  if  their  dress  be  not  as  gay, 
or  as  rich  or  as  fashionable  as  the  dresses  of 
their  companions?  Is  it  not  the  case  that  young 
ladies  sometimes  permit  their  thoughts  to  be  en- 
grossed and  their  affections  absorbed  in  the  cer- 
emonies of  a  party  or  the  attentions  of  the  beaux, 
so  much  so,  that  they  can  scarcely  speak,  think, 
or  dream  of  any  thing  else?  And  to  what  is 
this  owing,  but  to  the  absence  of  some  higher 
and  holier  object  of  affection.  Christianity  does 
not  ask,  my  young  friends,  that  you  should  be 
utterly  indifferent  to  dress,  etiquette  or  atten- 
tion. It  asks  only  that  you  should  assign  them 
their  proper  places,  and  give  them  that  degree  of 
regard  and  consideration  only, which  they  really 
deserve.  And  wherever  she  is  received  into  the 
heart  and  embraced  with  a  living  faith,  she  pro- 
duces the  characters  she  wishes  to  see.  For,  I 
ask  can  it  be  possible  that  the  young  lady  whose 
heart  has  been  touched  with  gospel  influences, 
who  has  imbibed  the  smallest  portion  of  the  gos- 
pel spirit,  can  it  be  possible,  I  ask,  that  such 
a  young  lady  can  suffer  her  thoughts  to  be  en- 
grossed, or  her  soul  to  be  disturbed  by  these 
comparatively  trifling  objects  of  regard?  Most 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.         37 

certainly  not.  The  claims  of  Christianity,  then, 
are  in  accordance  with  the  demands  of  your 
own  nature. 

Still  further,  where  the  affections  are  not  fixed 
upon  some  worthy  object  of  pursuit  and,  the 
mind  is  not  employed  in  the  attainment  of  that 
object,  there  will  be  much  unhappiness.  I  have: 
my  young  friends,  witnessed  much  of  uahappi- 
ness,  among  those  with  whom  I  am  associated, 
and  I  have  sought  earnestly  for  the  causes  of 
it.  These  are  various.  There  is  poverty, 
there  are  afflictions.  There  are  disappoint- 
ments. There  are  anxious  and  disturbing  im- 
aginations. These,  and  many  others  a-re  caus- 
es of  unhappienss.  But  31  r.ave  been  led  to 
the  conclusion;  from  what  I  have  myself  seen, 
that  there  is  no  one  canse,  which  is  every  day 
producing  so  much  unhappiness,  with  so  many 
individuals  as  the  want  of  soms  worthy  object 
of  affection  and  pursuit.  I  have  seen  I  think, 
more  real  unhappiness  produced  by  having 
nothing  to  do,  or  nothing  which  engrosses  the 
thoughts  and  affections,  and  which  from  its 
very  worth,  gives  a  sweet  and  calm  self-sat- 
isfaction to  those  engaged  in  its  pursuit,  than 

4 


38  YOUNO  LADY'S  AID. 

by  any  other  cause.  I  have  indeed,  seen  pa- 
rents in  great  anxiety  as  to  the  comforts  of  life 
for  themselves  and  their  children.  But  the 
efforts,  they  were  compelled  to  make,  served 
to  allay  their  anxiety,  and  the  unexpected  sup- 
plies, which  they  have  at  times  received,  have 
filled  them  with  great  and  resigned  trust  in  the 
wisdom  and  goodness  of  God's  overruling  prov- 
idence.  But,  on  the  other  hand,  I  have  wit- 
nessed tenfold  unhappiness  in  those,  who  were 
free  from  want  or  the  danger  of  want,  but 
whose  affections  were  not  fixed  upon  some 
worthy  object  of  pursuit.  When  the  ques- 
tion has  been  asked  me,  in  regard  to  such, 
'what  can  allay  their  unhappiness?'  I  have 
answered,  that,  to  human  eyes,  it  appeared 
that  nothing  but  actual  calamity,  or  their  be- 
coming truly  religious  can  ever  accomplish 
the  object.  I  feel  perfectly  safe,  then,  in 
saying,  that^where  you  will  find  one  unhappy, 
from  the  various  causes  to  which  I  have  allu- 
ded, you  will  find  ten  rendered  miserably  un- 
happy, from  the  want  of  some  worthy  and 
engrossing  object  ojf  thought,  affection  and 
pursuit.  Here,  too,  the  requirements  of 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    eHRISTIAWITT.        39 

Christianity  are  in  accordance  with  your  na- 
tures. She  presents  to  your  notice  the  high- 
est and  holiest  objects  of  affection  and  pur- 
suits, and  ask  that  you  should  devote  your- 
self supremely  to  them.  And  thus  she  asks 
you  to  pursue  the  course,  which  your  own 
natures  demand,  the  course,  without  which, 
your  affections  are  in  danger  of  becoming  fixed 
upon  unworthy  objects,  or  your  soul  rendered 
unhappy  from  the  want  of  some  worthy  and 
engrossing  object  of  pursuit. 

But  why,  you  may  ask,  are  these  remarks 
addressed  particularly  to  ladies?  Because,  I 
nnswer,  there  is  a  difference  between  your 
situation  and  that  of  gentlemen  in  this  respect. 
Gentlemen,  almost  unavoidably,  become  in- 
terested in  some  outward  but  engrossing  ob- 
ject of  thought,  affection  and  pursuit.  There 
are  the  public  affairs  of  the  nation.  There  are 
the  engrossing  cares  of  business.  Indeed, 
there  are  a  variety  of  engrossing  objects  of 
pursuit  around  them,  which  demand  their  at- 
tention and  secure  their  affections.  But  la- 
dies are  differently  situated  in  this  respect. — 
They  do  not  become  devoted  to  the  same  de- 


40  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

gree,  in  these  objects  of  outward  interest. 
Their  engrossing  objects  of  thought  and  af- 
fection must  be  within,  must  have  their  seat 
in  the  heart,  must- be  self-cherished  and  in- 
wardly cherished. 

1  do  not  say  that  all  men  are  devoted  to 
outward  objects  of  engrossing  interest,  but 
that  such  is  generally  the  case,  that  such  is  the 
natural  influence  of  their  peculiar  circumstan- 
ces. There  are  exceptions.  There  are  men 
whose  thoughts  and  affections  arc  not  fastened 
upon  high  and  worthy  objects,  nor  upon  en- 
grossing objects  of  any  kind.  And  the  re- 
sult with  them  is  the  same  as  with  ladies.— 
They  become  exquisits  in  dress,  and  spend 
their  time,  it  may  be,  in  dancing  attendance 
upon  the  most  light  and  frivolous  of  the  fe- 
male community.  Their  most  worthy  efforts 
are  directed  to  the  arranging  of  a  boquet. — 
Their  highest  mental  efforts  consist  in  select- 
ing and  presenting  flattering  compliments,  or 
in  penning  sonnets  to  the  personal  charms  ot 
some  lady  weak  enough  to  be  flattered  by 
their  attentions.  They  are  regarded  with 
contempt  by  the  reasonable  and  reflecting 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.         41 

« 

among  yourselves.  You  perceive,  therefore, 
that  the  law,  which  I  have  pointed  out,  ap- 
plies with  equal  force  to  man  as  to  woman, 
the  law,  that  where  the  attention  and  the  af- 
fections are  not  directed  to  high  and  worthy, 
or  at  least  to  interesting  and  engrossing  objects 
of  pursuit,  they  soon  fasten  themselves  upon 
those  which  are  unworthy;  and  that,  conse- 
quently, all  true,  rational,  elevating  happiness 
is  lost.  I  do  not  say  that  the  circumstances 
in  which  man  is  placed,  are  more  favorable 
than  those,  in  which  woman  is  placed,  to  the 
right  direction,  and  proper  development  pf  the 
affections.  I  only  say  that  such  is  the  fact, 
that  they  are  differently  situated.  The  at- 
tention and  the  affections  of  the  one,  are  al- 
most invariably  interested  in  some  outward, 
and  engrossing  object  of  pursuit.  The  pb- 
ject  of  pursuit  and  affection  with  the  other, 
must  be  something  within,  which  has  relation 
to  the  internal  and  spiritual. 

You    see,  then,  my  young    friends,   what 
Christianity  asks  of  you,  and  why  she  asks  it, 
and  what  in  all  probability,  will  be  your  char- 
acters, and  your  condition,  unless  you  comply 
4* 


•12  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

with  her  requests.  She  ••would  make  you 
worthy  of  yourselves,  worthy  of  that  image 
of  God  in  which  the  human  soul  was  origin- 
ally created,  sadly  debased  and  depraved 
ihotigh  it  now  be.  She  would  make  you 
worthy  of  the  station  you  occupy  among 
God's  creatures.  Nay  more,  she  would  make 
you  worthy  the  presence,  the  society  and  the 
happiness  of  heaven.  She  is  desirous  of 
presenting  you,  without  spot  and  blameless, 
at  the  throne  of  God's  mercy.  And,  that  she 
may  , do  this,  that  she  may  transform  your 
very  souls  into  the  heavenly  image,  she  asks 
that  you  would  give  her  your  hearts.  And 
will  you,  rny  young  friends,  will  you  refuse 
to  do  this  ?  Just  look  forward  for  a  few 
years  and  inquire  what  may  then  be  your 
situations  and  your  characters.  Shall  it  he 
that  any  one  of  you  will  hereafter  become 
the  object  of  contempt  or  of  pity  among  your 
acquaintances,  on  account  of  the  trifling,  friv- 
olous, and  unworthy  nature  of  the  objects  of 
your  thought,  afiection  and  pursuit?  Shall  it 
be,  that  any  one  of  you  will  hereafter  live  only 
for  the  pleasures  of  dress,  etiquette,  and  cer- 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.         43 

emony  ?  Shall  it  be,  that  any  one  of  you 
will  hereafter  be  the  slave  of  foolish  and  need- 
less anxieties,  ever  tormenting  yourselves, 
and  ever  annoying  all  around  you  ?  God 
forbid.  That  it  may  not  be  so,  depends  upon 
yourselves  under  God.  That  it  may  not  be 
so,  I  would,  most  earnestly,  entreat  every 
young  lady,  who  may  read  these  pages,  to 
resolve,  with  a  firm  reliance  upon  the  bless- 
ing of  God,  and  with  fervent  prayer  for  his 
aid,  to  resolve  that  she  will  give  her  heart  to 
her  God  and  her  Savior,  that  she  will  at  once 
embrace  the  religion  of  Jqsus,  and  seek  for 
that  true  and  living  faith,  which  works  by 
love  and  purifies  the  heart  where  it  dwells. 

In  the  second  place,  Christianity  asks  of 
you,  that  you  would  engage,  resolutely,  and 
with  a  determination  to  persevere,  in  a  course 
of  moral  and  religious  self-cultivation.  This 
may  seem  to  you  to  be  but  a  common  topic 
of  remark.  And  yet,  the  thoughts  which  I 
wish  in  this  connection  to  present  to  you,  are 
not,  I  believe,  common.  Were  I  to  we  the 

'  J  o 

importance  of  self-cultivation,  in  regard  to  the 
various  powers  of  the  mind,  in  regard  to  the 


44  YOUNG  LADY'.   AID. 

memory,  the  judgment,  the  taste,  you  would 
perceive  at  once,  the  propriety  of  my  attempt. 
But  in  regard  to  moral  and  religious  improve- 
ment, your  feelings,  I  fear,  are  very  different. 
You  feel  that  the  various  qualities,  which  go 
to  make  up  a  correct  moral  and  religious 
character,  must  be  the  result  of  natural  tem- 
perament or  of  special  influences.  But  such 
is  not,  I  am  satisfied,  the  feeling  inspired  by 
a  correct  view  of  the  claims  of  Christianity. 
She  would  first,  secure  your  hearts;  she  would 
have  your  affections  fixed,  supremely,  upon 
the  objects  which  she  presents,  God,  the 
Saviour,  holiness  and  heaven.  Then,  under 
the  influence  of  this  absorbing  devotion  to 
herself,  she  would  have  you  go  on  in  the  work 
of  moral  and  religious  self-cultivation.  That 
you  may  perceive  more  fully  what  she  requires 
of  you  in  this  respect,  let  us  dwell  for  a  mo- 
ment upon  some  traits  of  moral  and  religious 
character. 

1st.  I  would  speak  of  amiableness  of  dis- 
position and  of  character.  When  it  is  said 
that  such  ars  one  is  an  amiable  young  lady, 
the  feeling  is,  that  such  is  her  natural  temper- 


REQEUIRMENTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.         45 

ament.  But  there  is  the  feeling  also,  that 
others  differ  from  her  in  this  natural  temper- 
ament, and  therefore  cannot  be  expected  to 
resemble  her  in  this  characteristic.  And  yet 
Christianity  requires  that  every  one  should  be 
amiable.  I  know  of  no  such  character  as  an 
unamiable  Christian.  I  have,  indeed,  as,  I 
have  no  doubt,  you  all  have,  seen  those  who 
make  high  pretentious  to  religious  character, 
who  were  yet  extremely  unamiable.  But 
this  only  shews  that,  how  much  soever  the 
other  parts  of  their  character  may  have  been 
influenced  by  religion,  its  power  has  not  yet 
reached  this  characteristic.  Religion  requires 
that  all  should  be  amiable,  and  yet  religion 
is  addressed  to  persons  of  different  tempera- 
ment. The  amiableness  then,  which  religion 
requires,  must  be  the  result,  not  cf  natural 
temperament,  but  of  moral  effort.  And  what 
she  asks  you  to  become,  she  will,  if  taken  to 
your  hearts,  help  you  to  be.  She  teaches 
you  that  every  one  around  is  your  brother  or 
your  sister — worthy,  in  their  native  tenden- 
cies and  capacities,  of  your  love.  She  teaches 
that,  if  the  characters  and  manners  of  those 


46  TOVNC  LADY'S  A.ID. 

around  you  are  not  such  es  to  enlist  your 
affections,  yet  that  they  have  souls,  which 
God  loves,  which  the  Saviour  loves,  and 
which  are  worthy  of  your  love.  Nay  more. 
She  fills  your  heart  with  love  for  them.  And 
is  it  not  true,  as  a  general  rule,  that  we  are 
amiable  in  our  deportment  towards  those  we 
love,  and  that  the  stronger  be  our  love  to 
them,  even  though  it  may  take  the  form  of 
pity,  the  more  kind  and  amiable  will  be  our 
deportment  towards  them. 

Again,  religion  teaches  you  that  those  petty 
crosses  and  vexations,  which  disturb  your 
equanimity,  render  you  fretful,  peevish,  and 
unamiable,  are  ordered  or  permitted  by  God  , 
and  are  to  be  regarded  as  the  means,  if  rightly 
improved,  of  your  spiritual  good;  that  they 
are  ordered  in  spirit  and  in  love,  to  try, 
strengthen,  and  improve  your  moral  and  reli- 
gious character.  When  you  think  of  this, 
when  you  consider,  that  a  calm,  quiet  and 
amiable  deportment,  under  these  provocations, 
will  secure  your  religious  improvement,  when 
you  consider,  that  God  is  looking  upon  you 
to  see  how  you  meet  them,  and  stands  ready 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    CHiUSTIANIxr.        47 

to  grant  you  aid  to  overcome;  you  will  not,  I 
trust,  suffer  them  to  render  you  unamiable  in 
your  deportment.  Religion  then  stands  ready, 
with   her   instructions,  her   promises  and  her 
influences,  to  make  you  what  she  asks  you  to 
become.     There  is  indeed  a  natural  difference 
of  temperament;  some  have  greater  effort  to 
make,  in  order  to   become  what  religion  re- 
quires, in  this  respect,  than  others.    But  those, 
whose  efforts  are  the  greatest,  and  whose  strug- 
gles are  the  most  severe  here,  may  not  be  call- 
ed upon  to  struggle  so  severely  in  regard   to 
other  parts  of  the  character.     And  you   will 
permit  me  to  recommend  this  trait  of  amiable- 
ness,  to  your  particular  attention,  as  leing  pe- 
culiarly important  to  ladies.    Men  are  so  situ- 
ated as  to  be  exposed  to  great  and  prostrating 
trials,  but  woman  is   exposed  to   a   thousand 
little,  every  day  petty  crosses  and   vexations, 
which  are   extremely   annoying,  which  often 
come  upon  her  at  unawares,  and  which  too  of- 
ten render  her  fretful  and  peavish  and  unamia- 
ble.    It  is  therefore   peculiarly   important  to 
you  that  you  cultivate  a  resolute   and  deter- 
mined amiablencss  of  character. 


48  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

2.  Again,  there  is  contentedness  of  dispo- 
sition and  character.  This  is  a  trait,  which  we 
usually  regard  as  the  result  of  natural  temper- 
ament. And  yet,  Paul  says,  that  he  had 
learned  to  be  contented.  The  spirit  of  Chris- 
tianity, if  not  its  direct  injunctions,  requires 
that  we  should  cherish  and  cultivate  a  cheer- 
ful acquiesence  in  the  allotments  of  Providence. 
There  may  be  then,  there  is  a  contentment, 
which  is  a  moral  quality.  It  is  not  the  result 
of  natural  promptings,  but  of  moral  effort,  a 
determined  contcr.trr.tnt.  This  state  of  mind, 
religion  requires  each  one  to  seek.  And  in 
this  respect  too,  she  enables  men  to  be- 
come what  she  requires  them  to  be.  She  teach- 
es that  the  allotments  cf  Providence  are  not 
the  blind  results  of  chance,  nor  the  stern  de- 
cisions of  inexorable  fate,  but  the  kind  and 
judicious  adjustments  of  infinite  love  and  in- 
finite wisdom.  She  teaches  that  every  event 
of  life,  how  unpropitious  soever  it  may  seem, 
in  itself,  in  its  circumstances  and  immediate 
consequences,  may,  if  improved  by  us  aright, 
be  regarded  as  a  blessing,  in  reference  to  our 
higher  and  spiritual  improvement.  And  what 


UEQUIUKMF.NTS    OK    CHRISTIANITY.         49 

is  more,  she  fixes  the   affections  upon  things 
high  and  holy,    upon    objects    which  are    far 
above   the    pleasures  and  possessions  of  this 
life,  our  hopes  of  obtaining  which,  are  not  de- 
stroyed by  any  changes  or  disappointments   in 
these.    In    this  way,  religion  shows  us  why 
\ve  should  be    contented,  and   directs  our  at- 
tention   to  objects,  which    are  of  infinite  and 
eternal  value,  the   pursuit  of  which   naturally 
tends  to  make  us  comparatively   indifferent  to 
changes  and  disappointment  in  things  of  only 
temporary   duration     and     importance.     We 
are   then,  my    young    friends,  to  cherish  and 
cultivate  contentment.     We    are    not  to    ex- 
pect that  our  contentment    is  to   spring  only 
from  natural    temperament,  nor  yet  that  it  is 
to  be  given  to    us  by    special  influences,  nor 
that  it  is  to  exist  only  in  the   most  prosperous 
and  favorable  circumstances  of  our  lives,  when 
there  is  no  cause   in   operation,  which  could 
possibly  make  us  discontented.     Our  content- 
ment is  to  be    a  moral  quality,  cherished  with 
much  care,  resting  on  our  confidence  in   the 
wisdom   and    goodness  of    God's    overruling 
Providence,  and  resulting  from   our  engaged-* 

5 


50  Yorr.T.  LADY'S  AID. 

ness  in  the  pursuit  of  things  heavenly  and 
eternal.  It  should  be  a  determined  content- 
ment, manifesting  its  influence  in  all  its  vaiious 
circumstances  of  the  life. 

I  have  said,  my  young  friends,  that  religion 
asks  you.  i:i  the  second  place,  to  engage  in  a 
course  ol  moral  self-cultivation.  And  I  have 
illustrated  what  1  mean,  by  a  reference  to 
ivvo  qualities  of  character,  amiableness  and 
contentment.  I  have  not  selected  these 
because  thry  are  more  important  than  ethers, 
but  because  they  are  more  often,  than  others, 
attributed  to  natural  temperament.  1  have 
wished,  thus  gently,  to  correct  an  important, 
because  it  is  a  dangerous,  mistake.  The 
mistake,  that  the  various  qualities,  which  go 
to  make  up  a  perfect  moral  and  religious 
character,  are  the  result  of  natural  tempera- 
ment, or  of  special  influences.  I  have  wished 
to  establish  the  conviction  in  your  minds,  that 
whatever  may  be  your  naiuial  temperament, 
your  character  is  to  be  fashioned  after  the 
Christian  model,  and  that  all  the  various  parts 
of  your  character  are  to  Le  the  results  of  your 
own  efforts,  in  reliance  upcn  these  influences, 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.        51 

which  God  is  ever  ready  to  grant,  influen- 
ces granted,  not  to  supercede  the  necessity  of 
effort,  but  to  strengthen  and  second  the  efforts 
put  forth.  Whenever,  then,  you  see  in  oth- 
ers, or  picture  to  yourselves,  a  single  charac- 
teristic or  quality,  which  goes  to  make  up  a 
perfect  Christian  character,  consider,  I  beseech 
you,  that  such  characteristic  is  a  proper  object 
of  effort,  and,  that,  with  the  divine  blessing, 
which  will  never  be  withheld  when  desired, 
you  have  the  power  to  acquire  that  character- 
istic. You  can  be  amiable;  you  can  be  con- 
tented, you  can  regulate  your  affections. 
You  can  cultivate  tenderness  of  conscience 
and  cherish  feelings  of  devotion.  God  help- 
ing you,  you  can  do  these  things. 

But  I  have  wished  in  this  letter  to  correct 
another  prevalent  and  dangerous  mistake.  1 
believe  that  many,  who  would  gladly  be  reli- 
gious, are  waiting  for  a  chance,  which  shall 
render  more  self-cultivation  necessary.  Sup- 
pose some  young  lady  should  be  moved  by 
what  I  have  now  written,  and  should  come  to 
me  for  counsel  in  regard  to  her  efforts,  and 
I  should  point  out  to  her  some  one  fault  in  her 


52  YOUNG  LADV'S  AID. 

moral  character,  and  urge  her  to  commence 
the  Christian  course  by  attempting,  in  reliance 
upon  the  blessing  of  God,  the  reformation  of 
this  one  fault.  That  young  lady  would  have 
no  doubt  about  her  ability  or  duty  in  this  par- 
ticular. But  she  would  feel  that  this  was  not 
religion,  that  this  was  mere  moral  effort. — 
Whether  it  would  be  a  part  of  religion  or  not, 
would  depend  upon  the  motives  and  feelings, 
which  might  prompt  the  effort.  The  infidel, 
the  atheist  even  may  en^a^e  in  the  same  mo- 

J  O      D 

ral  self-cultivation,  in  vvjiich  the  chrislian  en- 
gages. But  then  he  would  be  actuated  by 
different  motives,  and  would  be  guided  by 
different  rules.  The  Christian  would  be  actu- 
ated by  a  regard  to  his  own  spiritual  improve- 
ment, by  desires  of  heavenly  happiness,  by  a 
constant  thought  of  the  presence  of  God  ami 
of  his  own  accountability  to  him,  and  the  rule 
by  which  he  would  guide  his  efforts  would  bo 
the  revealed  will  of  God.  But  the  influen- 
ces of  religion  do  not  render  unnecessary  this 
self-cultivation,  on  the  contrary,  they  press  it 
home  upon  the  heart  and  conscience  with  ten- 
fold more  power.  You  see  again  my  young 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.        53 

friends,  what  "Christianity  asksrof  you,  in  order 
that  she  may  do  all  for  you  which  she  is  capa- 
ble of  doing.  She  asks  that  you  should  give 
her  your  hearts,  in  other  words,  that  you  should 
set  your  affections  upon  religious*''"improve- 
ment,  as  the  one  grand  and  all  absorbing  ob 
ject  of  your  efforts.  And  then,  she  asks  that 
you  should,  under  her  guidance,  press  forward 
in  the  right  formation  of  your  own  moral  char- 
acters, that  you  should  resolutely  engage  in 
the  work  of  fashioning  your  own  moral  char- 
acter, in  all  its  parts,  of  feelings,  desires,  af- 
fections, conversation  and  conduct,  upon  the 
model  which  she  presents. 

But  when,  you  ask,  and  how,  shall  we  com- 
mence our  compliance  with  the  requirements 
of  Christianity?  These  questions  suggest  anoth- 
er important*  and  dangerous  mistake.  Many 
are  waiting  for  more  powerful  religious  im- 
pressions, impressions  which  shall  change  all 
their  feelings,  and  entirely  banish  from  the 
mind  and  heart,  at  once  and  forever,  all  feel- 
ings and  affections  hostile  to  religion.  Or, 
they  are  unwilling  to  begin  with  the  reforma- 
tion of  a  single  prominent  fault;  tbpy  hope, 

5* 


54  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

ere  long,  to  have  the    subject   so    brought    to 
their   minds,  and    to    have    their  feelings    so 
moved,  and  to  commence    the    reformation  of 
the  whole   character  at   once.     And,    while 
thus  waiting,    they   are   neglecting    the    calls 
addressed  to  them,  and  the  influence  granted. 
This,  I  have  said,  is  a    mistake.     And  in   an- 
swer to  the  questions  when  and  how  shall  we 
commence  a' compliance  with  the  requirements 
of  Christianity,  I  would  say,   begin    this  day. 
Begin  with  the  religious  impressions  now    up- 
on your  mind.     Begin  by  reforming    the  fault 
which  first  presents  itself  to  your   notice.-    Is 
there  one  young  lady,  who  has    read    what    I 
have  thus  far  written,  who  feels   the  slightest 
desire  to  please  God,  to  enjoy  eternal   happi- 
ness in  his  presence,  to  form  and  sustain  a   re- 
ligious character,  and  who    at    this    moment, 
remembers  that  she  has  not  practiced  the  dai- 
ly reading  of  the  scriptures,  and  daily  approach 
to  the  throne  of  grace  in  prayer,  let  her    un- 
der the  influence  of  the  feelings  of  which    she 
is  now  conscious,  and  the  impressions  that  are 
now  upon  her,  commence,  this  day,  these  ne- 
glected practices.     If  any  young  lady  is   con- 


REQUIREMENTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.       55 

scious  of  having,  in  times  past,  indulged  in 
thoughtless  and  frivolous  conversation,  let  her 
begin,  this  day,  the  correction  of  this  fault. 
If  any  young  lady  is  conscious  of  having,  in 
times  past,  confined  her  thoughts  to  the  vani- 
ties of  dress  and  fashion  and  amusement,  and 
of  having  spent  her  time  in  preparations  for, 
or  conversations  about  these,  to  the  neglect  of 
the  more  important  concerns  of  her  soul,  and 
the  service  of  her  God,  and  is  now  experi- 
encing compunctions  of  conscience,  faint 
though  they  be,  let  her,  under  the  influence  of 
these  compunctions,  seek  unto  God,  through 
Christ,  for  pardon.  Let  her,  this  day,  and 
without  waiting  for  stronger  feelings,  com- 
mence the  reformation  of  these  faults.  And 
in  general,  I  would  repeat  the  direction  already 
given  in  answer  to  the  questions  when  and 
how  shall  we  commence  a  compliance  with 
the  requisitions  of  Christianity.  Begin  this 
day.  Begin  under  the  religious  impressions 
now  upon  your  mind.  Begin]  with  reforming 
whatever  fault  first  presents  itself  to  your  no- 
tice. But  to  these  directions  I  would  now 
add  another.  It  is  this.  Be^in  with  the  feel- 


56  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

ing  that  it  is  on  God  that  you  depend  for  suc- 
cess, and  with  fervent  prayer    that    he    would 
deepen    your   religious   impressions,   that    he 
would  strengthen  your  faith  in,  and  devotion 
to,  the  Christian  religion,  your  faith  in,  and  de- 
votion to,  your  spiritual  natures  and  capacities, 
that  he  would  enlighten  your  minds  in    regard 
to  truth  and  duty,  that  he  would    lay   open   to 
you  all  the  hidden  iniquities  of  your  hearts,  all 
the  various  faults  in  your  character,   and    that 
he  would  crown  your  efforts,  in  religious  self- 
cultivation,  with  success.     If  you   will   com- 
mence this  day,  in  this  way,  you  may  be  cheer- 
ed by  the  well    founded   hope,    the   confident 
expectation,  that  although  the    struggle  is,    at 
first,  severe,  and  the  progress  at  first,  but  slow, 
yet  that,  in  the  end,  you  will  reach  the  mark, 
for  the  prize  of  the    high  calling   of  God    in 
Christ  Jesus. 

And,  now  my  friends,  you  have  learned  the 
requisitions,  which  Christianity  makes  of  every 
one  of  you.  Will  you  regard  these  requisi- 
tions? It  is  for  you,  in  the  exercise  of  your 
own  free  will,  to  say.  No  miracle  will  ever 
be  wrought  to  compel  you  to  regard  them. 


REQUIREME-NTS    OF    CHRISTIANITY.       57 

Will  you  regard  the  claim  and  the  require- 
ments of  Christianity?  Will  you  give  your 
hearts  to  religion,  and  make  religious  improve- 
ment the  great  object  of  your  affections,  de- 
sires and  efforts?  Will  you  commence  a  course 
of  moral  and  religious  self-cultivation?  And 
will  you  commence  that  course  this  day,  under 
the  religious  impressions  which  you  may  now 
experience,  and  with  the  fault  in  your  charac- 
ters, which  first  presents  itself  to  your  notice? 
These  are  questions  for  you  to  answer.  Upon 
the  manner  in  which  you  may  answer  them, 
depends,  in  a  great  degree,  your  future  char- 
acter, and  your  future  happiness.  Fix  them 
in  your  minds,  carry  them  with  you,  as  you 
close  the  hook.  Make  them  the  subject  of 
your  thoughts,  of  your  conversation  and  of 
your  prayers. 


LETTER     III. 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE. 

Recapitulation  of  former  letters — a  dangerous  habit  pre- 
vailing among  young    ladies — the    habit  of  living    for 
pleasure    rather    than    for   duty — Instances    in    proof 
from  wealthier  circles — from    the    middling    classes — 
from  those  in  indigent  circumstance — three  steps  in  the 
formation  of  this  habit  noticed — 1st.  Education   made 
mere   amusement.       2d.    The   reading  provided    for 
young  ladies  of  the  most  frivolous  kind;  exciting  only 
the  desire  for  pleasure  rather   than   for   improvement. 
3d.     Our  young  ladies  are  not  accustomed   gradually 
and  as  they  are  able  to  the  labors   of   the   household. 
The  effects  of  this  habit,  the  source  of  great  unhappi- 
ness,  frivolity  and  extravagance — it  unfits  young  ladies 
for  all  the  exigencies  and  emergencies   of  future   life 
—  it  exerts  a  pieventive  or  a  deleterious  influence    up- 
on  religious    improvement  and   Christian  character — 
Appeals  against  this  habit — to    the    higher  classes — to 
those  in  more  moderate  circumstances — to    mother* — 
to  young  ladies  themselves. 

It  may  not  be  amiss,  my  young  friends,  to 
rem  ind  you,  that,  in  my  first  letter,  I  endeav- 
ored to  awaken  vou  to  a  full  view  of  what 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  59 

Christianity  had  done  for  you,  to  the  truths, 
that  she  had  revealed  you  to  yourselves  as 
immortal  spirits, dependent  upon  and  account- 
able to  God,  that  she  had  set  you  free  from 
the  degrading  thought,  that  you  were  but 
the  appendages  of  man,  and  had  filled  you 
with  the  ennobling  idea,  that  you  are  emana- 
tions from  the  infinite  and  all  perfect  spirit; 
that  she  has  thus  filled  you  with  deep  rever- 
ence for  yourselves,  for  your  own  natures, 
tendencies,  capacities,  and  possible  spiritual 
elevation;  that  she  had  inspired  in  men  deep 
respect  for  you,  as  intellectual  and  spiritual 
beings,  and  filled  their  hearts  with  kindness  to 
you;  and  that  she  had,  in  this  way  elevated 
your  rank  and  ameliorated  your  condition. 
And  why  did  I  say  this  ?  Because,  my  young 
friends,  I  wished,  if  possible,  to  turn  your 
attention  away  from  the  vanity  and  the  frivol- 
ity, which  are  every  where  around  you, 
threatening  to  absorb  all  your  thoughts,  to 
paralyse  all  your  energies,  to  bring  your 
immortal  spirits  down  from  angel  flights,  and 
confine  them  to  the  mere  baby  house  pleas- 
ures, and  the  doll-dressing  employments  of 


60  Yor.vr;     LADY'S  AID. 

infant  intellects.  Nay  more,  I  wished,  if 
possible,  and,  through  the  blessing  of  God 
upon  my  efforts,  to  awaken  you  to  the 
thought  that,  if  God  had  seen  fit  to  create 
you  immortal  spirits,  and  to  place  you  in  the 
near  relationship  of  dependence  upon  and 
accountability  to  himself  ;  still  further,  that 
if  God,  from  his  infinite  love  for  your  spirit- 
ual natures,  had  seen  fit  to  send  his  only 
begotten  and  dearly  beloved  Son,  to  save 
you  from  the  love,  the  power,  the  conse- 
quences of  sin;  and  yet  further  still,  that,  if 
Christ  had  looked  upon  your  spiritual  natures, 
debased  and  depraved  though  they  were,  with 
a  love  stronger  than  bis  love  of  life,  with  a 
love  which  made  him  willing  to  sacrifice 
himself  upon  the  cross  for  their  rescue  from 
the  thraldom  and  the  present  and  future  con- 
sequences of  sin;  I  wished,  I  say,  if  possible, 
to  awrakenyou  to  the  thought  in  all  its  power, 
that,  if  God  the  almighty,  and  Jesus  the  Sa- 
vior, had  felt  such  love  for  your  spiritual 
natures,  and  had  made  such  efforts  to  free 
these  spiritual  natures  from  the  bondage  and 
the  inevitable  consequences  of  sin,  and  tq 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  61 

elevate  them  to  the  happiness  of  holiness 
and  of  heaven;  then  these  spiritual  natures 
were  worthy  of  your  own  most  serious 
thoughts,  most  diligent  and  careful  watch  and 
cultivation.  And,  my  friends,  just  dwell  for 
a  moment  upon  the  thought.  Has  God 
created  you  in  his  own  image,  has  he  called 
you  his  children,  has  he  bestowed  upon  you 
spiritual  capacities  and  made  you  capable  of 
loving,  serving  and  enjoying  him,  has  he  sent 
his  only  begotten,  his  dearly  beloved  Son  to 
save  you  from  a  debasiDg  and  degrading  sla- 
very, and  has  Jesus,  the  Savior,  subjected 
himself  to  the  ignominious  death  of  the  cross, 
that  he  might  rescue  your  souls  from  wretch- 
edness and  ruin,  and  train,  them  up  for  the 
holiness  of  heaven,  and  are  not  these  spiritual 
natures  worthy  of  your  deepest  reverence,  of 
your  most  heartfelt  devotion,  of  your  highest 
efforts  in  their  right  training  and  proper  de- 
velopment, in  their  cultivation  and  improve- 
ment ?  Oh,  it  cannot,  I  have  said  to  myself, 
it  cannot  be  possible,  that  -any  young  lady, 
with  these  thoughts  upon  her  mind,  can  re- 
main indifferent  to  the  high  and  holy  purposes 

G 


62  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID 

for  which  she  was  created,  can  any  longer, 
live  for  mere  frivolity  and  vanity,  or  for  a 
mere  formal,  outward  and  heartless  morality, 
to  the  neglect  of  her  immortal  and  spiritual 
interests,  her  soul's  salvation.  Under  the 
influence  of  these  feelings,  I  wished  to  com- 
mence mv  letters  to  you  bv  awakening,  an 

•>  */  •/  O 

earnest  longing  after  spiritual  improvement 
and  heavenly  happiness. 

In  my  last  letter,  I  endeavored  to-  urge 
home  upon  your  attention,  the  claims  of  re- 
ligion upon  you,  in>regard  to  your  moral  and 
religious  character;  to  show,  that  she  first 
demands  your  heart,  nothing  less  than  the 
purest  and  holiest  and  most  ardent  affections 
of  your  soul;  and  that  she  then  asks,  that  you 
would1  engage,  at  once,  with  resolute  deter- 
mination, and' under  her  guidance,  in  a  course 
of  moral  and  religious  self-cultivation.  And 
after  hinting  at  the  way  in  which  you  are  to 
pursue  this  moral  and  religious  self-cultiva- 
tion, I  closed  by  urging  you  to  commence 
your  compliance  with  the  requirements  of 
Christianity,  at  once,  with  the  impressions 
then  upon  your  mind?,  with  the  reformation 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE. 

"of  tlie  fault  in  your -character,  whatever  it 
may  he,  which  should  first  present  itself  to 
your  notice,  with  an  humble  feeling  of  depen- 
dence upon  God,  and  with  fervent  prayer  to 
him  for  guidance  and  assistance.  And  why 
did  I  say  this  ?  Because,  I  answer,  I  wished 
to  aid  you  to  begin  your  religious  course 
aright.  Some  there  are,  who  commence, 
what  they  regard  as  their  religious  course, 
without  eivin'f  their  hearts  to  God  -and  his 

o  o 

service,  but  in  reliance  upon  their  own  ener- 
gies, and  in  efforts  at  mere  moral  improve- 
ment. Such  make  no  regular  and  valuable 
religious  progress.  Indeed,  they  make  no 
religious  progress  at  all.  They  are  ever 
halting.  All  their  efforts  are  feeble  or  fitful, 
one  moment  vigorous,  and  the  next  moment 
relaxed.  Forsaking  the  -unfailing  support  of 
•God's  ever  ready  and  promised  assistance, 
and  relying  solely  upon  their  own  resolutions 
and  energies,  they  soon  find  .that  they  have 
been  leaning  upon  a  broken  staff.  They 
endeavor  to  remove  the  inward  and  dee;p 
seated  disorder  ol  their  souls,  by  applications 
*to  its  particular  outward  manifestations,  while 


04  YOUNG    LADY  S    AID. 

they  overlook,  or  entirely   neglect,  the  seat 
of  the  disorder  itself. 

Then,  there  are  others,  whose  religious 
course  commences  in  an  entire  change  of 
feelings.  But  here  they  stop,  they  rest  satis- 
fied with  this  change  of  feelings.  They  do 
not  go  resolutely  forward,  under  the  influence 
of  their  renewed  feelings,  in  a  course  of  mor- 
al and  religious  self-cultivation,  in  efforts  to 
strengthen  and  render  more  influential  their 
principles,  to  purify  and  elevate  their  affec- 
tions, to  render  more  tender  and  snsceptible 
their  consciences,  to  imbibe  more  fully  and 
breath  more  constantly  the  Christian  spirit. 
And  the  consequence  is,  that  you  often  dis- 
cover, in  the  characters  of  such,  conduct 
which  is  highly  unchristian,  in  close  connec- 
tion with  religious  fervor.  The  tongue,  that 
is  one  moment  employed  in  the  praise  of 
God,  is,  the  very  next  moment,  perhaps, 
employed  in  circulating  scandal  in  regard  to 
man.  The  conscience  that  would  be  pained 
•at  the  omission  of  an  iota  of  the  creed,  looks 
quietly  on,  while  a  neighbor  is  deprived  of 
his  dues.  These  are  the  ways,  in  which 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  '<K> 

many  make  a  wrong  beginning  in  their  reli- 
gious course.  I  have  wished,  if  possible,  to 
point  out  to  you  the  right  way  of  beginning. 
I  would  have  you  begin,  by  seeking  an  entire 
a  thorough,  a  radical  change  of  heart,  that  so 

.your  affections  may  be  set  supremely  upon 
God  and  his  service,  upon  Jesus  and  the 
salvation  which  is  by  him.  And  then,  in 
immediate  -connection  with  this  devotion' of 
heart  to-  God,  yea,  as  the  very  manifestation 
of  its  power,  and  as  the  means  by  which  it  is 
carried  forward  to  perfection.  I  -would  have 

,you  commence  a  course  of  religious  and  moral 
self-cultivation.  For  I  have  hoped  that,  by 
beginning  in  this  way,  the  more  carefully  you 
might  cherish  your  love  to  God,  the  more 
constant  -and  faithful  you  might  be  in  your 
religious  exercises,  the  more  diligent  and 
conscientious  you  would  become  in  the  right 
discharge  of  all  your  various  duties.  While, 
on  the  other  hand,  7.  have  hoped  that,  the 
more  diligent  and  conscientious  you  might  be 
in  your  efforts  for  moral  and  religious  im- 
provement, the  more  carefully  would  you 
cherish  your  love  to  God,  and  the  more  en- 

G* 


66  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

tirely  and  devotedly  would  yon  give  your 
hearts  to  Christ  and  his  religion,  and  that 
thus,  these  two,  which  are  often  separated, 
the  devotion  of  the  heart  to  the  service  of 
religion,  and  the  exertion  of  the  energies  for 
moral  and  religious  improvement,  would  be 
united,  in  well  adjusted  harmony,  to  produce 
the  perfect  exemplification  of  the  Christian 
character,  devotion  of  heart,  giving  inward 
purity  and  steady  zeal,  and  outward  obedience, 
producing  uprightness  in  dealings,  knidness 
in  social  intercourse,  yea,  holiness  of  life,  in 
all  the  varying  scenes  through  which  you  may 
be  called  to  pass. 

I  should  have  closed  my  remarks,  my 
young  friends,  upon  moral  and  religious  char- 
acter, with  the  suggestions  of  my  last  letter, 
had  I  not  believed,  that  there  is  one  circum- 
stance in  the  present  training  and  prevailing 
habits  of  many  of  our  young  ladies,  which  is 
so  specious  in  its  appearance,  that  it  does  not 
excite  the  fears,  either  of  those  who  are  its 
victims  or  of  their  friends,  while,  at  the  same 
time,  it  is  so  deleterious  in  its  influences  as 
to  weaken,  if  not  entirely  efface  every  im- 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  67 

pression  that  may  be  made,  and  paralize  or 
prevent  every  effort  that  may  be  put  forth. 
Yes,  my  young  friends,  I  speak,  with  deep 
conviction  of  the  truth  of  what  I  say,  and 
with  feelings  deeply  saddened  at  the  thought 
that  it  is  true,  when  I  say,  that  there  exists 
and  prevails  among  many  of  you,  a  habit  of 
life  which'mustbe  broken  through,which  must 
be  done  away,  defore  you  will  be  permanent- 
ly happy  in  yourselves,  or  extensively  useful 
to  others;  before  we  can  hope  that  you  will 
perform  well  the  duties  of  your  respective 
relations  on  earth,  or  make  proper  prepara- 
tion for  the  enjoyments  of  heaven. 

Do  you  ask  what  this  habit  of  life  is,  which 
prevails  so  extensively  among  young  ladies, 
which  is  so  specious  in  its  appearances,  and 
yet  so  deleterious  in  its  consequences?  I 
answer;  it  is  the  habit  of  living  for  pleasure 
rather  than  for  duty;  for  the  mere  enjoyment 
of  the  hour,  rather  than  for  the  higher  pur- 
pose of  being  useful,  of  doing  good,  of  se- 
curing personal  improvement  and  promoting 
domestic  and  social  enjoyment.  This  habit 
I  say,  prevails  among  many  young  ladlee. 


68  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

Do  you  ask  for  the  proof?  Go  visit  the 
more  wealthy  circles  of  society.  And  what, 
I  ask,  do  you  find  to  be  the  employment  of 
many  of  the, young  ladies  there?  They  spend 
much  time  upon  dress,  in  conversing  about  it. 
in  studying  its  changes,  in  arranging  its  forn/s, 
and  all  for  what?  Is  it,  that,  by  understand- 
ing these  things,  they  may  themselves  be  pre- 
pared for  usefulness  to  others,  or  for  indepen- 
dent self-support,  should  a  change  come  over 
the  circumstances  of  their  parents?  Well 
would  it  be,  were  these  their  objects.  But 
it  is  only  that  they  may  gratify  their  vanity,  or 
perhaps,  in  the  hope  that  they  may  set  off 
their  charms  to  greater  advantage,  and  render 
themselves  more  agreeable  to  friends  and  vis- 
itors. Then  there  comes  a  little  light  reading, 
the  last  new  novel,  the  most  splendid  and 
fashionable  annual,  or  some  monthly  publi- 
cation, designed,  as  it  is  announced  on  the  ti- 
tle-page, expressly  for  ladies,  and  filled  with 
its  plates  of  fashions  and  its  succession  of 
idle  and  love-sick  tales.  All  is  mere  froth, 
nothing  solid,  nothing  substantial,  nothing  to 
inform  the  mind,  or  warm  the  heart,  or 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  69 

strengthen    the   principles,    or  improve   the 
character,  nothing  to  render  the  young  lady 
herself  more  happy  in  resources  of  her  own, 
or  more  capable   of  promoting  the  improve- 
ment and  happiness  of  those  with  whom  she 
may  associate.     Then  comes  a  little   needle- 
work, for  it  would  be  ungenteel  or  vulgar   to 
engage  in  that,   which  is  more   course  and 
useful,  in  making  or  repairing  the  garments  of 
the  family.     Then  it  may  be  a   little   shop- 
ping, not  for  purchases,  but  for  pleasure,  fol- 
lowed by  visiting  and  receiving   visits,    not 
visits  of  friendship,  where  the  heart  is  warm- 
ed, and  the  mind  excited  by  an   interchange 
of  thought  and  an  exercise  of  the  affections, 
but  mere  calls  of  ceremony,   to  comply  with 
the  rules  of  fashion,  indulge   in  idle  gossip, 
and,  it  may  be,  to  gather  food   for   scandal. 
Such  I  say  is  the  manner,  in  which  day  after 
day  is  too  often  spent  by  many  young  ladies 
among  the  more  wealthy  and  fashionable  cir- 
cles of  society.     Do  you  say  that  I  am  speak- 
ing in  regard  to  what  I  do  not  know.     I   an- 
swer, I  speak  only  of  what  I  have  seen   and 
of  what  my  heart  has  been  pained  to  behold. 


70  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

Do  you  say  that  I  have  looked  at  these  things 
only  through  a  colored  medium  and  with  jaun- 
diced eyes.  I  cannot  believe  that  I  have 
done  so,  when  I  find  my  own  opinions  con- 
firmed, by  so  accurate  an  observer  of  man- 
ners, and  one  who  has  enjoyed  so  good  an 
opportunity  of  knowing  the  habits  and  prac- 
tices of  females  in  the  wealthier  circles  of  so- 
ciety, as  Miss  Sedgwick,  the  author  of  sev- 
eral interesting  works  with  which  you  are  ac- 
quainted. And  Miss  Sedgwick,  in  a  late  work, 
says,  'How  many  lives  are  consumed  in  utter 
frivolity.  A  little  light  reading,  a  little  shop- 
.ping,  visiting,  dressing  and  undressing,  and 
so  day  after  day  passes  away.'  Such  is  the 
language  of  a  lady,  who  has  been  favored  witli 
opportunities  of  knowing,  and  who  is  well 
qualified  to,  judge,  in  regard  -to  what  she  writes, 
I  cannot,  then,  but  feel  that  there  is  too  much 
of  truth  in  the  description  I  have  given,  of 
the  way  in  which  many  young  ladies,  in  the 
wealthier  circles  of  society,  spend  their  time 
and  employ  their  thoughts. 

But  the  habit,  of  which  I  speak,  is  not  con- 
fined to  the  wealthier  circles  of  society.     I 


DUTY    BEFORE    PHEAbURE.  Tt 

have  myself  seen  the  family, where- the  father 
was  a  hard  laboring  mechanic,  a  man  of 
worth-  and  respectability  of  character,  and 
the  mother  an  industrious  and  prudent  house- 
wife, spending  the  day  in  the  faithful  discharge 
of  her  domestic  duties,  while  yet,  the  daugh- 
ters were,  to  use  the  language  of  the  lady  al- 
ready quoted,  the  daughters  were  'the  mere 
ornamental  furniture  of  their  father's  house.' 
Their  rninds  were  not  interested  in  promot- 
ing the  good  of  the  family,  their  time  was 
not  employed  in  securing  personal  improve- 
ment. They  were- aping  the  manners  of  those 
more  wealthy  than  themselves,  and,  that  they 
might  avoid  vulgar  attention  to  pressing  du- 
ties, and  useful  Inbor  and  might  appear  more, 
truly  genteel,  they  spend  their  time  also  in 
light  reading,  shopping,  visiting  and  dressing. 
This  have  I  seen — nay  more,  I  have  mingled 
enough  in  this  class  of  society  to  know  that 
this  is  not  an  isolated  or  a  singular  case.  I 
verily  believe,  that  too  many  are  the  cases, 
among  what  may  be  regarded  as  composing 
the  middle  interest  in  society,  where  the  fath- 
er and  the  mother  are  toiling  on,  day  after  day 


72  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

with  ardent  affection  and  unwearied  diligence, 
but  with  mistaken  kindness,  in  order  to  pro- 
cure the  means  of  supporting  the  daughters 
as  young  ladies,  in  a  life  of  idleness,  frivolity 
and  vanity. 

The  habit  of  which  I  am  speaking,  extends 
itself  even  into  families,  which  are  in  com- 
paratively indigent  circumstances,  and  where 
every  effort  and  every  energy  of  every  mem- 
ber of  the  family,  should  be  put  in  requisition 
to  secure  an  honest  and  independent  support. 
There  are  fathers  and  there  are  mothers,  who 
are  filled  with  that  foolish  pride,  which  makes 
them  unwilling  that  their  daughters  should 
make  themselves  acquainted  with  any  of  those 
arts,  which  are  appropriate  to  women,  or 
seek,  among  the  more  wealthy,  that  employ- 
ment which  will  afford  the  means  of  support. 
Consequently,  the  daughters  are  trained  up 
in  idleness,  or  in  mere  frivolous  and  useless 
occupations,  accustomed  to  spend  their  time 
only  in  the  pursuit  of  pleasure,  and  are  sent 
forth  into  society  to  become  useless  and 
wretched  incumbrances.  There  is  among 
some  the  feeling  that  there  is  disgrace  attach- 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  73 

ed  to  poverty,  and,  consequently,  every  effort 
is  made  to  avoid  the  appearance  and  the 
acknowledgment  of  poverty.  There  is,  too, 
the  feeling,  that  there  is  disgrace  in  the  cir- 
cumstances that  a  female  is  laboring  for  a 
support,  and,  especially,  that  there  is  deep 
disgrace  attached  to  some  kinds  of  employ- 
ment. What  mistaken  notions  are  these! 
Disgrace  attaches  itself  to  conduct  and  not  to 
condition.  Respectability,  in  either  male  or 
female,  is  the  attribute  of  character  and  not 
of  employment.  There  is  uo  disgrace  in  hon- 
est poverty,  and  where  meekness  and  indus- 
try adorn  the  condition,  they  are  well  calcula- 
ted to  secure  respect,  sympathy  and  allevia- 
tion. But,  if  in  the  midst  of  poverty  there 
is  idleness,  pride,  with  feelings  above  work, 
and  vanity  and  extravagance,  these  qualities 
of  character,  and  not  the  circumstances  of 
condition,  excite  general  contempt  or  pity. 
There  is  nothing  tingenteel  or  vulgar,  in  a 
young  lady's  engaging  in  labor  for  the  support 
of  herself  and  the  assistance  of  her  friends. 
The  disgrace,  where  there  is  disgrace,  is  at- 
tached to  idleness,  pride,  vanity,  and  that 


74  TOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

mental  imbecility,  that  vacuity  of  mind,  that 
utter  heartlessness,  and  needless  dependence, 
which  are  the  natural  consequences  of  these. 
To  quote,  still  again,  the  language   of  the  la- 
dy already  twice  referred  to,  'there  is  no  oc- 
cupation so  vulgar  as  indolence  and   vanity.' 
A  moment's  reflection,  one   would   suppose, 
must  teach  this.     Here,    for   example,  is   a 
young  lady,  whose    parents   are   in    indigent 
circumstances.  She  has  made  herself  acquain- 
ted with  some  employment,  by  means  of  which 
she  can  secure  constant  occupation.     In   this 
way  she  supports- herself,   becomes   indepen- 
dent of  parental  exertions,  and  is  able  to   do 
something  for  the  alleviation  of  parental  wants. 
In  time  her  aged  parents  need  still  greater  as- 
sistance.    This  she  is  able   to  render  them. 
She  who  in  infancy  was  the  object  of  so  much 
parental  anxiety,  and  care  and  effort,  is   now 
able  to  render  some  humble   return  for  what 
she  has  received      Now  I  ask   if  every  true 
heart,  every  sound  mind,  every  one,  in  short, 
whose  respect  is  worth  enjoying,    does   not 
feel  deep,  and  heartfelt  respect  for  such  a  char- 
acter.    But  suppose  she  had  thought   it   un- 


BEFORE    PLEASURE.  75 

genteel,  or  vulgar,  or  derogatory  to  the  rank 
and  condition  once  sustained  by  parents  or 
ancestors,  and  had  spent  her  time  in  idleness, 
in  vainly  striving  to  ape  the  more  wealthy,  in 
dress,  visiting  and  fashion,  suppose  she  had 
cast  herself  in  helpless  dependence  upon  rich 
relatives,  would  she  not  soon  have  become  a 
burden  to  friends,  and  an  object  of  contempt 
or  pity  to  all?  But  I  trust  I  have  said  enough 
on  this  point,  to  establish  the  truth  of  my  po- 
sition, or  at  least  enough  to  bring  to  your 
minds  instances  which  have  fallen  within  your 
own  observation,  of  those,  who  live  for  pleas- 
ure rather  than  for  duty,  for  the  mere  enjoy- 
ment of  the  passing  hour,  rather  than  for  use- 
fulness or  improvement. 

But  perhaps  you  may  ask  for  a  more  par- 
ticular description  of  what  I  mean  by  living 
for  pleasure  rather  than  for  duty.  I  can  best 
answer  this  inquiry,  by  describing  the  process 
of  training,  by  which  young  ladies  are  brought 
to  this  condition,  and  under  which  they  form 
this  habit.  And  first,  there  is  an  error  in  the 
very  process  of  education.  .  At  the  present 
day  it  is  the  position  of  many,  that  all  educa- 


76  YOUNG  LADY'S  ATJ>. 

lion,  and  especially  the  earliest  steps  in  edu- 
cation, must  be  made  so  interesting  as  to  be- 
come mere  play>  that  so  the  child  may  be 
drawn  along  by  her  mere  love  for  the  amuse- 
ment which  the  process  of  education  affords. 
If  a  particular  school  does  not  please,  it  must 
be  deserted.  If  any  particular  branch  of 
study  does  not  interest,  it  must  be  exchanged 
for  one  that  does.  All  close  and  faithful  and 
persevering  application  to  prescribe  lessons 
is  decried,  intheearfier  stages  of  education, 
and  the  whole  work  must  be  accomplished  by 
the  conversations  of  the  teacher,  and  these 
conversations  roust  be  made  to  interest.  But 
what  is  the  plain  truth  in  regard  to  till  this? 
Children  lo?e  to  be  amused,  and,  if  the  teach- 
er can  tell  stories  in  regard  to  the  various 
branches  of  study,  they  will  pay  the  deepest 
attention,  And  what  is  the  effect?  Instan- 
ces with  which  I  have  been  made  acquainted, 
prove  that  children,  thus  trained  in  their  earli- 
est efforts,  soon  acquire  an  habitual  loathing 
of  all  close  and  continued  mental  application. 
If  you  will  tell  them  a  story,  they  are  all  at- 
tention, if  you  assign  them  a  lesson  to  be  stud- 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  77 

ied,  there  is  fretting,  murmuring,    and  a  ne- 
glect of  the  lesson.     Nay,  worse.     There  is 
formed  the  habit  of  asking   in   regard  to  all 
studies,  not,  whether  the  lesson  has  been   as- 
signed; not,  whether  the  faithful  study  of  the 
lesson  be  a  duty;  not  whether  it  may  be  used 
in  after  life,  but  whether  it  is  interesting  and 
pleasing.     And  thus   the  whole  process   of 
education  becomes  an  inquiry  for   pleasure. 
A-nd  die  school  girl,  even  w4ule  acquiring  iier 
education,  is  living  not  for  an  unreserved  de- 
votion to  duty,  but  for  pleasure.     And   tken 
this  habit  of  mind  soon   exerts   a  condoling 
influence  over  the  character.     Are  the   com- 
mands and  acquirements  of  parents  pleasing? 
They  are  obeyed  with  {.lacrity.     But  if  they 
are  otherwise,  they  are  either  entirely  disre- 
garded, or  obeyed  with  reluctance  and   mur- 
muring.    This  error   in   education    extends, 
in  some  instances,  even  to  the  Sabbath  school 
and  to  religious  instruction.     If  the   child   is 
not  pleased  to  attend,  because  she   does   not 
find  that  her  teacher  possesses  the  power   of 
amusing,  she  is  permitted  to  stay  away;  if  the 
prescribed   lesson  require  patient  study,   and 
7* 


7B  FOUXG  LADY'S  AID 

close  application,  it  is  omitted,  and  tlie  cry  is, 
that  all  must  be  done  by  the  oral  instruction 
of  the  teacher.  I  was  once  called,  in  the 
absence  of  a  friend,  to  take  charge  of  a  class 
in  a  Sabbath  school.  The  children  came,  all 
bright  and  happy,  but  with  no  lessons.  They 
came  to  be  amused  by  the  stories  of  the  teach- 
er. And  what  must  be  the  consequences  of 
this  view?  It  is  to  connect  even  with  the 
subject  of  religion  the  same  search  for  pleas- 
tire* 

Now,  in  view  of  the  future  character,  and 
of  what  God  requires  of  us,  this  seems  to  me 
to  be  in  a  great  degree  wrong.  I  speak  not 
now  in  regard  to  intellectual  improvement, 
although,  it  must  be  evident  to  every  one, 
that  a  lesson,  the  knowledge  of  which  is  ac- 
quired by  one's  own  persevering  efforts,  is, 
in  an  intellectual  point  of  view,  worth  ten 
times  the  amount  of  knowledge  passively 
received  from  the  lips  of  another.  But  I 
speak  more  particularly  of  the  influence  of 
these  views  upon  moral  character.  I  would, 
indeed,  have  every  study  made  as  interesting 
as  it  can  be  made,  by  clearness  of  statement, 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  79 

and  simplicity  of  illustration.  Hut,  then  I 
would  have  the  child  accustomed  to  go  regu- 
larly and  quietly  through,  whatever  is  pre- 
scrihed,  hecause  such  a  course  is  the  course 
of  duty,  without  ever  asking  the  question, 
whether  it  be  interesting  or  not.  If  this 
habit  be  once  firmly  fixed,  it  will  be  of  more 
value,  in  regard  to  the  future  character,  than 
all  the  knowledge  that  can  possibly  be  acquir- 
ed. 

[  have  said,  that  the  first  step  in  the  forma- 
tion of  the  evil  habit,  of  which  I  am  speaking, 
is  in  wrong  notions  of  education.  The  sec- 
ond step,  is  to  be  found  in  the  reading  which 
is  provided  for  the  young,  and  especially  that, 
to  which  the  attention  of  young  ladies  is  prin- 
cipally directed.  The  object  of  whatever  is 
thus  prepared,  is  to  interest,  to  amuse.  And 
most  of  those  books,  which  do  not  succeed 
in  this,  are  soon  thrown  aside.  Is  their  at- 
tention directed  to  history?  Oh,  that  is  dull. 
The  same  scenes  and  characters  and  events 
must,  with  much  embellishment,  be  wove  into 
a  highly  wrought  work  of  fiction,  in  order  to 
secure  readers.  Is  a  didactic  work  upon 


80  TOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

mo/als  put  into  the  hands  of  young  ladies? 
In  seven  cases  out  of  ten,  it  is  thrown  aside  as 
absolutely  insufferable.  If  the  same  moral 
instructions  are  conveyed  in  a  fictitious  nar- 
rative, it  will  secure  readers.  Though,  in 
seven  cases  out  often,  it  is  more  than  proba- 
ble, that  the  story  is  only  remembered, 
without  even  a  guess  as  to  the  moral  instruc- 
tion intended  to  be  conveyed.  To  this  sub- 
ject of  reading,  I  shall  refer  again,  when,  in  a 
future  letter  I  speak  of  intellectual  improve- 
ment. What  I  now  wish  you  to  notice,  is, 
that  the  great  object  of  reading  is  not  improve- 
ment but  amusement',  not  profit,  intellectual 
and  moral  profit,  but  the  mere  enjoyment  of 
pleasure.  And,  thus,  the  reading  of  the  day- 
tends  to  strengthen  and  confirm  the  habit, 
commenced  in  early  education,  and  of  seeking 
only  pleasure  in  all  the  circumstances  of  life, 
of  living  for  pleasure  rather  than  for  duty. 
This  then,  the  character  of  the  reading  of  our 
young  ladies,  is  the  second  step  in  the  forma- 
tion of  this  evil  habit. 

The  third  step  is,  that  our  young  misses  are 
not  accustomed,  gradually,  and  as  they    are 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  Oi 

able,  to  the  labors  of  the  household.  They 
are  taught  to  look  to  domestics  for  the  perfor- 
mance of  a  thousand  little  duties,  which  they 
are  able  to  perform  for  themselves,  and  which 
it  would  be  much^better  for  them  to  perform 
for  themselves.  I  am  aware  that  the  excuse 
often  is,  they  are  now  at  school,  when  they 
have  completed  their  education,  as  it  is  tech- 
nically called,  then  they  can  attend  to  this. 
But  I  am  myself  fully  satisfied,  that  if  put  to 
household  duties  early,  according  to  their 
strength,  and  accustomed,  even  while  at 
school,  to  the  faithful  performance  of  a  portion 
of  these  duties,  their  health  would  be  improv- 
ed, their  mental  vigor  increased,  arid  their 
education  itself  rendered  more  solid  and  valua- 
ble. And  my  opinion  is  formed  from  facts, 
that  have  fallen  under  my  own  observation. 
I  have  observed,  almost  universally,  that  those 
manifested  more  mental  vigor,  and  were  less 
superficial,  andjnore  thorough  scholars,  who 
were  compelled  to  spend  some  portion  of 
every  day,  in  ihe  faithful  discharge  of  house- 
hold duties.  But  I  am  looking  at  this,  you 
will  remember,  in  a  moral  point  of  view,  and 


82  YOUNG    LADf's    AID. 

in  reference  to  future  character,  and  here,  I 
am  satisfied^  that  the  course  pursued  is  most 
deleterious.  They  are  accustomed  to  be 
waited  upon  by  others,  while  they  themselves 
are  thinking  only  of  their  own  pleasure.  They 
thus  form  a  habit,  which  it  is  difficult,  in  after 
life,  to  break  through.  And,  you  all  know, 
that  those  labors  to  which  the  individual  is 
early  and  constantly  accustomed,  are,  in  ordi- 
nary cases,  performed  with  more  ease  and 
propriety,  than  when  the  attention  is  direct- 
ed to  them  only  in  after  life.  Still  further, 
this  view  of  first  acquiring  an  education,  and 
then  attending  to  those  labors,  gives  rise  to 
false  notions.  The  term  education,  is  suppos- 
ed not  to  denote  the  gradual  formation  and 
development  of  character,  by  means  of  du- 
ties, as  well  as  studies.  It  is  supposed  to 
denote  a  positive  amount  of  knowledge  and 
accomplishments,  to  be  acquired  for  future 
use  or  display.  And,  when  this  idea  is  once 
fixed  in  the  mind,  the  labors  of  the  house- 
hold fall  under  its  influ»nce.  They  are 
thought  to  be  a  part  of  education,  the  last 
branch  perhaps,  in  regard  to  which,  the  ob- 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  83 

jectis  to  acquire  a  positive  amount  of  knowl- 
edge for  future  use  or  display.  But  to  me  it 
seems  that  God  has  established  that  holiest 
of  all  institutions,  the  family  circle,  for  wise 
purposes.  And  one  of  these  purposes,  I 
believe  to  be,  the  right  development  and  pro- 
per improvement  of  the  characters  of  its  vari- 
ou§  members,  by  enlisting  the  interest  of  each 
in  the  welfare  of  all,  by  subjecting  all  to  mu- 
tual trials,and  calling  upon  all  for  the  discharge 
of  reciprocal  duties.  1  believe  that,  where 
the  daughter  cherishes  an  interest  for  the 
welfare  of  the  family,  feels  a  responsibility  in 
regard  to  it,  and  makes  sacrifices  of  self  indul- 
gences, and  puts  forth  vigorous  efforts  in 
household  labors  and  duties,  the  heart  and  the 
mind  and  the  character  will  be  improved. 
But  when  the  daughter  is  only  a  boarder  in 
her  father's  house,  feeling  no  responsibility 
in  regard  to  the  household  affairs,  and  conse- 
quently, taking  no  deep  interest  in  them, 
performing,  regularly  and  systematically,  no 
part  of  the  labors,  she  loses  the  benefit  which 
God  has  designed  for  her  in  this  holy  rela- 
tion. She  might  as  well  be  aboarder  in  some 


84  YOUNG  LADY'S   AID. 

public  house,  there  to  be  waited  upon  by 
others,  there  to  live  in  idleness,  or  in  those 
merely  frivolous  employments,  which  require 
no  effort  and  call  for  no  self-sacrifices.  I 
have  often  been  surprised  to  witness  the  differ- 
ent effects  upon  the  heart  and  the  character, 
resulting  from  the  different  courses  I  have  al- 
luded to.  If  you  learn  the  characters  of 
young  ladies,  who  have  been  merely  board- 
ers in  their  father's  houses,  feeling  no  respon- 
sibility, taking  no  interest,  performing  no 
labors,  making  no  sacrifices,  you  will  be  sur- 
prised to  find  how  vain,  frivolous  and  selfish, 
they  are.  They  seem  not  to  have  acquired 
the  power  of  reflection.  They  seem  to  be 
utterly  indifferent  to  each  other's  happiness. 
But,  on  the  contrary,  if  you  become  acquain- 
ted with  the  characters  of  young  ladies,  who 
have  struggled  with  the  other  members  of 
their  families,  making  sacrifices,  performing 
labors,  and  thus  cherishing  feelings  of  interest 
and  responsibility,  you  will  be  surprised  to 
find  how  much  their  powers  of  thought  and 
reflection  have  been  strengthened  and  devel- 
oped, and  how  pure  and  ardent  and  self' sac-. 

9 


DUTY    BEFORE    PI.EASTRK..  85 

rificing  are  their  affections  for  those,  for  whom 
they  have  made  sacrifices,  and  with  whom 
they  have  labored  and  struggled. 

You  will  perceive,  from  these  remarks, that 
I  would  have  every  young  lady,  while  under 
her  father's  roof,  and  before  being  called  to 
other  and  different  scenes  and  duties,  regard 
the  household  labors  of  the  family  as  a  part 
of  her  appropriate  and  continued  duty,  not 
merely  as  a  branch  of  education,  to  be  attend- 
ed to  for  a  season  and  then  neglected,  but  as 
her  regular  appropriate  duties,  assigned  by 
God,  in  the  very  constitution  of  the  family 
circle,as  the  best  means  to  develope  and  form 
female  character.  In  this  view,  they  will 
not  be  neglected  during  the  years  devoted  to 
books,  and  while  acquiring  the  knowledge, 
which  is  to  prepare  the  mind  for  future  self- 
improvement.  But,  as  this  plan,  of  leaving 
all  attention  to  these,  until  school  education 
is  completed,  is  so  specious,  it  may  be  well 
to  ask  how  it  is  in  fact.  Suppose,  then,  that 
the  young  lady  has  neglected  these,  while  at- 
tending school.  And  now  she  returns  from 
school,  with  a  confirmed  habit  of  neglect,  and 


80  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

an  acquired  reluctance  of  feelings,  in  regard 
to  all  this  class  of  duties.  She  has  formed 
the  habit,  it  may  be,  of  seeking  only  her  own 
pleasure,  instead  of  living  for  duty.  Will 
not  these  habits  and  this  reluctance,  do  much 
to  prevent  her  engaging  heartily  and  with 
.interest  in  these  labors?  But,  still  further, 
she  has  now,  among  her  school  mates,  a  large 
circle  of  acquaintances.  And  to  keep  up 
these  acquaintances,  there  must-bo  a  contin- 
ual round  of  morning  calls  and  afternoon 
visits  and  evening  parties,  to  take  up  the 
time  and  attention.  And,  it  may  be,  that  the 
young  lady  has  a  circle  of  acquaintances 
among  the  young  gentlemen,  for  whose  calls 
she  must  ever  be  in  full  dress,  as  it  would  be 
highly  improper  to  have  them  suppose  that 
she  employed  herself  in  hard  and  useful  labor 
at  times,  and  dressed  according  to  her  occupa- 
tion. Taking  these  circumstances  into  ac- 
count, I  ask,  if  there  is  any  probability  that 
there  will  be  a  hearty  interest  taken  in  house- 
hold labors,  and  a  hearty  devotion  to  them,  as 
the  appointed  and  appropriate  duties  of  life  ? 
I  cannot  believe  there  is.  This,  then,  is  the 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  87 

last  step,  I  can,  at  this  time,  notice,  in  the 
formation  of  the  evil  habit,  of  which  1  have 
been  speaking.  And,  you  learn  from  what  I 
have  said,  what  I  mean  by  living  for  pleasure 
rather  than  for  duty.  I  do  not  confine  my 
remarks  to  those,  who  live  in  the  extreme  of 
lolly  and  fashion.  No;  I  would  extend  them" 
to  all  who  are  seeking  for  pleasure  instead  oi 
asking  what  is  duty. 

And  now  I  will  point  out  the  effect  of  this 
habit.  And  fust,  it  is  die  source  of  great  un- 
happiness,  frivolity  and  extravagance.  It  is 
the  source  of  great  uuhap'piness.  God  has 
created  us  for  duty,  for  virtue,  and  not  for 
mere  enjoyment.  He  has  indeed  attached 
happiness  to  the  performance  of  duty.  But 
the  question,  which  he  would  have  us  ask  in 
regard  to  any  course  of  conduct,  is  simply  the 
question,  'Is  it  duty?'  When  we  have  once 
satisfied  ourselves  that  any  course  of  conduct 
is  our  duty,  he  would  have  us  to  press  reso- 
lutely forward  in  its  performance.  Are  there 
obstacles  to  overcome?  He  would  have  us, 
not  shrink  before  them,  but  call  forth  stronger 
resolutions  and  put  forth  more  vigorous  efforts. 


88  YOUNC  LADY'S  AID. 

Is  the  course  unpleasant?  Still  it  is  duty, 
and  he  would  have  us  press  forward,  regard- 
less of  its  unpleasant  circumstances,  with  the 
feeling  that,  all  we  have  to  do  is,  to  ascertain 
and  perform  duty,  without  once  asking  wheth- 
er the  course  before  us  be  pleasant  or  not. — 
And  he  has  so  constituted  us,  that  the  inward 
satisfaction  of  having  performed  even  unpleas- 
ant duties,  will  give  peace  and  happiness.  But 
if,  on  the  contrary,  we  ask  only  what  will  be 
pleasant,  and  seek,  in  our  various  courses,  only 
for  enjoyment,  we  shall  find  ourselves  disap- 
pointed in  our  expectations,  while  the  thought 
of  having  neglected  duty  in  our  search  for 
pleasure,  will  give  to  our  disappointment  ten- 
fold poignancy.  This  living  for  pleasure  rath- 
er than  for  duty  is  the  source  of  great  unhap- 
piness.  It  is  the  source  of  frivolity  and  ex- 
travagance. What  is  it,  I  ask,  but  this,  that 
leads  young  ladies  to  the  novel,  to  a  blind 
subserviency  to  fashion,  to  seek  for  display  in 
dress  and  furniture?  Is  it  not,  that  they  are 
seeking  for  pleasure  from  these?  And,  as 
they  have  left  the  path  pointed  out  by  God, 
is  it  strange  that  they  should  fall  into  a  thous- 


DUTY    BRFOHE    PLEAST'RE.  O\) 

and  vain  and  extravagant  notions?  Certainly 
siot.  This  living  (or  pleasure  rather  than  for 
duty  is  the  source  of  unhappiness,  of  frivolity 
and  of  extravagance.  Nay  more,  it  opens  a 
wide  door  to  temptation  and  sin.  if  yon  will 
look  over  the'dark  catalogue  of  female  de- 
pravity^ and  will  question  the  individuals  there 
named  as  to  the  course  they  have  pursued 
and  the  cause  of  their  ruin,  they  must  answer, 
if  they  answer  truly,  that  they  early  formed 
the  habit  of  living  for  pleasure,  that  they  soon 
become  vain  and  frivolous  in  rnhd,  weak  in 
principle  and  extravagant  in  their  desires.  And 
that  to  gratify  their  vanity,  their  love  of  finery 
and  display,  they  yielded  to  the  temptations, 
which  assailed  them,  and  fell  the  victims  of  sin 
and  of  moral  ruin.  Such,  in  nine  cases  out 
of  ten  must  be  the  answer. 

]>ut  again,  this  habit  of  living  for  pleasure 
rather  than  for  duty  utterly  unfks  our  young 
ladies  for  all  the  exigencies  and  emergencies 
of  future  life.  Suppose  your  parents  are  now 
wealthy.  Are  there  not  constantly  recurring 
events,  in  this  kind,  of  a  character  to  teach 
the  uncertainly  of  wealth,  the  frequency  of 


90  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID 

change?     IIo\v  often  do  we  see  those  wl.o  are 
on  the  very  pinnacle  of  wealth,  one  day,  hurl- 
ed, on  the  next,  to  the  deepest  poverty  !    And 
most  surely,  with  so  many  constantly  recurring 
instances  around  you,    you   cannot   feel    safe, 
you  cannot  feel  that  the  riches  of  your  parents 
are  certain.      Suppose   then,    that   a  change 
should  come  over  the    circumstances    of  your 
parents,  what  would  be  your  condition.     With 
no  means,  art  or  power,  for  your  self-support, 
with  no  mental  vigor  orstrength  of  moral  prin- 
ciple, with  an  extravagant  love   of  finery    and 
show  and  parade,   a    slavish   subserviency    to 
the  opinions  of  others  and  the  whims  of  fashion, 
having  been  accustomed  to  seek    for  pleasure 
rather  than  to  live  for  duty,  would  you  not  be 
most  wretched,  and    would    not  the    sight    of 
your  wretchedness  add  tenfold  to  the  anguish 
of  the  father  and    mother,   who,  in   mistaken 
kindness,  have  made  you  a    pet   and    trained 
you  to  vanity  and  extravagance. 

Again,  suppose  you  are  left  to  wend  your 
way  through  the  world  alone,  either  with  or 
without  property.  Will  not  this  habit  render 
you  wretched  in  yourself,  and  the  cause  of 


PUTT    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  91 

unhappiness  to  all  around  you?  Seeking  only 
for  pleasure,  you  are  continually  disappointed 
and  continually  unhappy.  Having  been  ac- 
customed to  the  services  and  attentions  of 
others,  you  will  be  continually  vexed  at  their 
indifference  to  your  wishes.  You  will  soon 
become  a  burden,  and  all  the  service  and  at- 
tention you  can  command,  will  be,  not  the 
service  of  friendship,  rendered  cheerfully  and 
affectionately,  but  the  mere  mercenary  atten- 
tions of  the  hireling,  rendered  in  cold  indiff- 
erence, and  only  for  pay.  Not  having  been 
accustomed  to  seek  out  ways  of  making  your- 
self useful  to  all  around  you,  your  society 
will  be  avoided,  or,  at  best,  only  endured. 
Your  friendship  will  be  dreaded.  Not  being 
accustomed  to  depend  upon  yourselves,  you 
will  be  compelled  to  feel  that  you  must  de- 
pend upon  those,  who  have  no  affectionate 
regard  for  you,  while  you  live,  and  who,  you 
are  satisfied,  will  rejoice  when  you  are  dead. 
But,  still  further:  suppose  that,  in  the  pro- 
vidence of  God,  you  assume  the  relation  of 
wife.  How  will  you  ba  prepared  for  the 
solemn  responsibilities,  nnd  important  duties, 


92  YOUNG  I.AKY'S  AID. 

and  peculiar  trial?  of  that  relation.?  You  hr.ve 
formed  the  habit  of  living  only  for  pleasure, 
and  not  for  duty.  You  have  accustomed 
yourself  to  a  round  of  frivolity,  vanity  nnd 
fashion.  You  have  become  utterly  dependent 
upon  the  services  of  others,  for  the  most  com- 
mon attentions  of  Jife;  you  have  not  accus- 
tomed yourselves  to  the  duties  of  the  house- 
hold, ond  have  acquired  a  reluctance  for  its 
labors.  If  you  enter  the  marriage  relation 
with  these  habits  and  these  feelings,  you  must 
either  begin  at  once  entirely  anew,  breaking 
up  all  your  old  habits  and  feelings  and  associ- 
ations,and  commencing  the  formation  of  habits 
and  the  cultivation  of  feelings  of  an  entirely 
different  character,  based  on  different  princi- 
ples, and  aiming  at.  different  objects.  You 
must  do  this,  I  say,  or  you  will  be  utterly 
wretched  in  yourselfand  the  source  of  wretch- 
edness in  your  husband.  He  will  soon  learn 
that  he  has  not  found  a  companion,  that  he 
has  obtained  only  a  toy,  an  expensive  toy 
too,  for  it  must  be  gaily  dressed,  and  carefully 
served  by  two  or  three  hired  domestics.  Is 
he  in  doubt?  He  cannot  ask  counsel,  for  you 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  93 

have  not  been  accustomed  to  think  and  reflect 
and  cannot  therefore  give  counsel.  Is  he  in 
trouble?  He  dreads  to  communicate  his  dif- 
ficulties to  the  wife  of  his  bosom,  lest,  instead 
of  summoning  up  energy  and  coming  [to  his 
relief,  by  your  retrenchment  and  reform,  you 
will  be  only  like  a  spoiled  child,  rendered  dis- 
consolate at  the  loss  of  your  accustomed  in- 
dulgences. You  see  then,  my  young  friends, 
that  this  habit  is  not  only  the  source  of  un- 
bappiness,  frivolity  and  vanity,  but  that  it 
tends  to  destroy  all  energy  and  nerve  of  char- 
acter, and  utterly  unfit  you  for  the  stations, 
duties  and  emergencies  of  future  life. 

Still  further,  this  habit  of  living  for  pleas- 
ure rather  than  for  duty,  exerts  a  preventive, 
or  a  deleterious  influence  upon  religious  im- 
provement and  Christian  character.  The  hab- 
it, you  will  bear  it  in  mind,  is  that  of  seeking 
for  pleasure.  Does  a  young  lady  attend  the 
house  of  worship,  under  the  influence  of  this 
habit?  You  might,  almost  as  well,  hope  to 
make  an  impression,  by  speaking  to  the  winds, 
ns  addressing  her.  And  why?  Because  let 
her  be  as  deeply  interested  as  she  may,  it  is 


94  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

only  her  own  pleasure,  which  she  seeks, her 
own  enjoyment  of  which  she  speaks.  Could 
}  ou,  with  the  power  of  Almighty  truth,  and 
the  eloquence  of  angelic  tongues,  speak  so  as 
to  move  the  very  stones  about  you,  still  she  is 
the  same,  seeking  only  pleasure,  and  speaking 
only  of  her  enjoyment  of  the  powerful  thrill 
sent  through  her  frame.  Nay^  more,  seeking 
only  pleasure,  she  has  no  reverence  for  the 
place,  the  services,  or  the  being  worshiped. 
And  even  in  the  most  solemn  parts  of  the  ser- 
vice, if  an  amusing  sight  presents  itself,  or  an 
amusing  thought  is  suggested,  you  see  her  at 
once  indulging  in  laughter,  speaking  to  others 
and  disturbing  many.  What  hope  is  there 
from  the  most  earnest,  faithful  and  serious  dis- 
course, addressed  to  such  aone?  ThankGod 
there  is  hope,  but  not  in  the  power  of  man, 
it  is  only  in  the  influences  of  God's  spirit,  1 
say  then,  that  this  habit  exerts  a  preventive 
influence  upon  religious  improvement. 

But  suppose  one,  who  is  under  the  influ- 
ence of  this  habit,  becomes  interested  in  reli- 
gion, this  same  feeling  of  selfishly  seeking 
pleasure,  pervades  her  religious  character.  Is 


DUTY    EKFOIli:   PLKASL'KI-:.  9-3 

any  outward  effort  to  be  m-ide,  or  any  noble 
project  started?  You- will  find  her  all  zeal 
and  ardor.  But,  vvben  difficulties  arise,  when 
obstacles  oppose,  then  this  zeal  and  ardor 
evaporate.  -  Is  there  any  religious  exercise, 
in  which  she  feels  deeply  interested,  and  from 
which  she-hopes  for  much  pleasure,  she  will 
make  every  effort  to  attend.  But  is  she  dis- 
appointed, she  Is  rendered  uncomfortable  and 
unhappy,  shewing,  that  still,  though  under  the 
form  of  religious  exercises,  she  is  selfishly 
seeking  her  own  enjoyment,  that  she  is  still 
living  for  pleasure,  not  for  duty :  that  her  in- 
terest in- religious  exercises,  is  only  a  love  for 
self  gratification,  that  she  has  not  learned  the 
very  .first  principle  in  practical  godliness^ 
which  is  an  unreserved  and  self-sacrificing  de- 
votion to  duty,  to  the  will  of  God.  Thus  you 
perceive  that  this  habit  exerts  a  powerfully 
deleterious  influence  upon  the  Christian  char- 
acter, generating  self-deception,  preventing  or 
cripling  Christian  efforts,  and  quenching  the 
influences  of  God's  spirit. 

I  have  thus,  my  young  friends  pointed    out 
a  prevailing  habit,  which    as  I    sincerely    be- 


06  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

lieve,  stands  in  the  way  of  your  social,  intel- 
lectual and  moral  improvement,  a  habit,  which 
as  I  have  said,  must  be  broken  through,  be- 
fore we  can  hope  that  you  will  be  prepared 
for  future  happiness,  for  future  duties,  or  fcr 
Christian  improvement;  the  habit  of  living  for 
pleasure  rather  than  for  duty.  I  have  endeav- 
ored to  prove  the  existence  of  this  habit,  to 
point  out  its  origin,  and  to  describe  its  evil 
effects. 

It  remains  only,  that  in  a  few  closing  remarks 
I   suggest    the   remedies.     Are    there    those 
among  the  readers  of  these    pages,    who    be- 
long to   the  wealthier   circles   of  society,    to 
them  I  would  say,  great    responsibility,  upon 
this  subject,  rests  with  you.     It  is   for  you  to 
set  the  example  of  living  for  duty  rather  than 
for  pleasure.     It  has  been  with  those  of  your 
circle,  that  this  evil  of  regarding   the    perfor- 
mance of  ordinary  labor  and  the  conscientious 
devotion  to  every  day  duties  as  ungenteel  and 
vulgar.     Indeed  it  is  with  some  of  your  cir- 
cle that  the  evil   has   commenced,  if  we  go 
still  further  back,  in  establishing  gentility  and 
not   duty    as   the    standard.     And    say,  my 
8 


DTL'Y    BKKORK    PLEASURE.  97 

friends,  shall  not  the  remedy  of  the  evil  com- 
mence with  you?     God  grant  that  it  may. 

Are  there  those  among  the  readers  of  these 
pages,  who  belong  to  the  middling  classes  in 
society,  or  those  who  are  in  more  indigent  cir- 
cumstances, to  them  I  would  appeal,  I  would 
exhort  them  to  act  in  independence  of  the 
foolish  notions  which  may  prevail  around  them. 
Dare  to  despise  that  which  is  of  no  worth. 
Dare  to  appear  as  you  are,  and  to  serve  your 
God  by  a  right  performance  of  the  duties  of 
your  situations,  unmoved  by  the  sneers  or  the 
practices  of  others.  Dwell  in  thought  upon 
your  relation  to  God,  and  you  will  be  strength- 
ened to  withstand  the  sneers  of  men,  especial- 
ly when  you  consider  that  these  sneers  come 
only  from  the  light  minded  and  frivolous, 
whose  respect  is  not  worth  possessing. 

Are  there  those  among  the  readers  of  these 
pages,  who  sustain  the  solemn  and  responsi- 
ble relation  of  mothers.  To  them  I  would 
appeal.  Look,  my  friends  upon  those,  your 
fair  daughters.  God  committed  them  to  your 
trust  and  training.  In  that  trust  you  are  ac- 
countable. The  results  of  that  training  must 


98  YOUNG    LADY'S  AID. 

be  exhibited  before  God.  He  committed 
them  to  your  reasonable,  social  immortal  be- 
ings. And  now,  I  say,  will  you  return  them 
to  him,  with  feelings  made  selfish,  with  minds 
rendered  powerless,  and  with  hearts  filled 
with  frivolity  and  vanity,  with  desires  con- 
fined to  parade  and  dress  and  fashion,  shall 
such  be  the  character  of  these  precious  trusts, 
as  you  return  them  to  him,  who  gave  them? 
Oh,  no;  God  forbid.  I  call  upon  you,  then, 
to  exert  all  the  energies  of  your  souls,  to 
turn  the  attention  of  fern*  le  mind  away  from 
the  never  ending  search  for  pleasure,  and  to 
direct  it  to  an  unreserved,  self-sacrificing  de- 
votion to  duty.  The  evil  begins  while  your 
daughters  are  under  your  dictation  and  influ- 
ence. To  you  then,  I  appeal  in  their  behalf. 
Oh,  sacrifice  not,  I  beseech  you,  on  the  altars 
of  vanity  and  fashion,  those  immortal  spirits 
committed  to  your  trust.  Consider  that  it  is 
your  highest  duty,  and  that  it  will  be  your 
highest  honor,  that  you  have  trained  them  up 
to  live  for  duty,  and  consequently  for  happi- 
ness and  for  heaven. 


DUTY    BEFORE    PLEASURE.  y9 

But,  young  ladies,  the  greatest  responsibil- 
ity, after  all,  rests  upon  yourselves.  For, 
whatever  may  be  the  opinions  and  the  practi- 
ces around  you,  and  whatever  may  have  been 
your  early  training,  when  you  are  .capable  of 
reflection,  you  are  called  upon  to  act  for  your- 
selves, upon  your  own  responsibility,  and 
with  the  thought  that  you  are  yourselves,  to 
bear  the  consequences  of  your  conduct. — 
To  you  then  young  ladies,  1  appeal.  And 
shall  I  appeal  to  you  in  vain,  when  I  appeal 
in  behalf  of  yourselves,  and  of  your  highest 
happiness  and  greatest  improvement.  It  can- 
not be.  Consider  then,  I  beseech  you,  the 
high  powers  which  are  bestowed  upon  you, 
the  elevation  and  usefulness  of  whichyou  are 
capable,  and  say,  shall  all  this  be  forfeited  in 
your  silly  chase  for  pleasure?  Consider  that 
you  have  immortal  spirits,  committed  to  you, 
that  you  may  train  and  fit  them  for  heavenly 
joys.  Consider  what  God  and'  Christ  has 
done  for  you.  And  shall  all  this  have  been 
done  in  vain?  Oh,  no.  Is  there  one  young 
lady  who  may  read  these  pages,  who,  as  she 
looks  onward  to  the  emergencies  of  future 


100  YOUNG  LADY'S   AID, 

years,  to  future  character,  and  still  further  ou 
ward  to  the  spiritual  world,  is  there  a   young 
lady,  I  would  ask,    who   will  not,   as   these 
thoughts  are  suggested,  resolve   that  she    will 
no  longer  live  for  pleasure,  but  for  duty. 


LETTER  IV.   . 

INTELLECTUAL,  IMPROVEMENT. 

Reasons  for  introducing  tha  subject  — first,  wrong  no- 
tions upon  the  subject  ofeducation  prevalent — second 
but  few  perceive  the  connection  there  is  between  intel- 
lactual  education  and  moral  and  spiritual  improve 
ment — Wrong  notions — Education  supposed  to  denote 
not  the  development  of  mind  but  the  acquisition  of  a 
positive  amount  of  knowledge — Education  means  to 
draw  the  powers  out  into  active  exercise — the  studies 
of  school  to  be  regarded  as  means — the  mental  strength 
and  development  secured  the  object  aimed  at — This 
object  secured  by  the  actual  exercise  of  the  mind — 
without  much  regatd  to  the  objects  about  which  it  is 
exercised;  Those  who  enjoy  ad  vantages  should  remem- 
ber that  their  being  well  educated  depends  not  so 
much  upon  the  advantages  enjoyed,  as  upon  the  man- 
ner in  which  they  are  improved,  those  not  favored 
with  advantages  may,  by  the  right'  exercise  of  their 
minds  upon  their  duties  and  trials,  secure  tho  result 
aimed  at  in  the  pursuit  of  studies — mental  develop- 
ment and  strength — Intellectual  development  has  n 
most  important  connection  with  moral  and  spiritual 
improvement — Thw  proved  and  illustrated — All  edu- 
cation is  for  eternity — VV-hat  are  usually  regarded  as 
results  are,  in  this  view,  to  be  regarded  as  means  of 
further  advancement  and  progress — This  thought  cal- 
culated to  "exert  a  poweiful  influence  npoti  the  feel- 
ings and  the  dibits. 

9* 


102  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

MY  YOUNG  FRIENDS: 

I  have,  already,  as  you  will  remember, 
urged  upon  you  the  claims  of  Christianity  to 
your  affections,  to  that  faith  which  is  of  the 
heart,  and  which  is,  consequently,  a  faith 
unto  righteousness,  and  unto  salvation.  And 
then  I  have  urged  upon  you  the  importance  of 
adding  to  your  faith  virtue,  the  importance  of 
commencing,  under  the  influence  and  the  guid- 
ance of  religion,  a  course  of  moral  and  reli- 
gious self-cultivatian.  I  have  also  endeavored 
to  remove  the  obstacles  in  the  way  of  your 
progress,  by  cautioning  you  again:t  the  danger 
to  which  you  are  all  exposed,  of  forming  the 
habit  ef  living  for  pleasure  rather  than  for 
dut}'.  The  way  is  now  open  for  urging  upon 
you  the  importance  of  adding  to  your  virtue, 
knowledge,  of  connecting  with  your  efforts 
for  moral  and  religious  self-cultivation,  cor- 
responding efforts  for  intellectual  improve- 
ment. I  am  about  to  address  you  therefore, 
my  young  friends,  upon  the  subject  of  intel- 
lectual improvement.  It  is  a  subject  upon 
which  I  conceive  it  to  be  of  the  utmost  impor- 
tance to  speak  in  this  connection,  and  that 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPOVEMENT.      103 

for  two  reasons.  In  the  first  place,  there  are 
prevalent  among  young  ladies,  many  wrong 
notions  upon  the  subject  of  education,  notions 
too,  which  prevail,  perhaps,  to  as  great  an 
extent  among  those  who  are  conscientiously 
seeking  for  moral  and  religious  improvement, 
as  among  others.  And  in  the  second  place, 
but  few  have  so  reflected  upon  the  subject  as 
to  perceive  the  connection  there  is  between 
intellectual  cultivation  and  moral  improvement 
and  the  importance  of  both  intellectual  and 
moral  cultivation  as  aids  to  spiritual  progress. 
And  first,  I  have  said  there  are  wrong  no- 
tions prevalent  upon  the  subject  of  education. 
We  often  hear  it  said  of  a  young  lady,  that  she 
has  completed  her  education.  Does  not  this 
expression  imply  that  education  is  regarded 
as  the  acquisition  of  a  certain  amount,  a  posi- 
tive and  definite  amount  of  knowledge  and 
accomplishments?  A  young  lady  has  com- 
pleted her  education!  And  why?  Because 
she  has  acquired  the  amount  of  knowledge 
usually  acquired^by  young  ladies  of  her  stan- 
ding, and  is  as  accomplished  as  others  of  her 
age  and  station;  or  because  she  has  acquired 


104  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

as  much  knowledge,  attended  to  t!«e  study  of 
as  many  different  branches,  as  \vou!d  be  con- 
venient in  her  circumstances  and  with  her 
time.  Therefore  her  education  is  to  her 
completed.  I  am  confirmed  in  the  opinion 
that  such  are  the  ideas  attached  to  the  term 
education,  from  another  expression  we  often 
hear.  We  often  hear  it  said  that  such  a 
young  lady  has  acquired  a  good  education, 
and  that  the  education  of  another  lady  is  de- 
fective. And  why  so?  Because  the  one  has 
acquired  a  greater  amount  of  knowledge,  has 
attended  to  more  branches  of  study  and  is  fa- 
miliar with  a  greater  number  of  what  are  corn- 
rnonly  regarded  as  accomplishments,  than  the 
other.  And  does  not  this  mode  of  speaking 
iniply,  that  the  term  education  is  regarded  as 
denoting  a  definite  and  positive  amount,  either 
greater  or  less,  of  knowledge?  This,  it  seems 
to  me,  is  a  wrong  notion,  but  what,  you  will 
ask,  are  we  to  understand  by  the  term  edu- 
cation? In  answer,  I  would  say,  that  the 
original  word  from  which  the  term  education 
is  derived,  means  to  lead  forth  or  draw  out. 
The  term  education  then,  properly  means  the 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     105 

drawing  out  of  the  various  capacities  of  our 
nature  into  full  and  free  exercise.  And  it  is 
applied  more  especially  to  the  various  studies 
and  exercises  of  childhood,  because  these  are 
regarded  as  the  instruments  of  drawing  forth 
and  exercising  the  various  powers  of  body 
and  mind,  and  thus  developing  and  strength- 
ening them.  You  have  often  heard  the  im- 
portance of  physical  education  spoken  of. 
Some  years  ago  gymnastics  were  recommend- 
ed to  young  gentlemen,  and  calisthenics  to 
young  ladies  as  useful  means  of  physical  edu- 
cation. But  why  so?  Not  because  it  was  of 
any  great  practical  importance,  to  know  how 
to  perform  the  various  movements  and  ex- 
ercises, to  which  the  attention  was  direct- 
ed, or  even  to  be  skilled  in  their  perform- 
ance. But  because  thesn  exercises  were 
thought  to  be  instrumental  in  drawing  forth 
the  bodily  strength,  in  exercising  the  bodily 
powers,  in  developing  and  strengthening  the 
bodily  system.  I  point  out  this  distinction, 
between  bodily  exercise  as  the  means  and 
bodily  health  and  strength,  as  the  end  to  be 
obtained,  in  order  to  guard  against  a  mistake, 


106  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

into  which  men  fall  in  regard  to  this,  as  in  re- 
gard to  almost  every  other  subject,  the  mistake 
of  regarding  means  as  the  essential  thing,  to 
the  neglect  of  the  end  to  be  obtained  by  the 
use  of  these  means. 

There  were  some,  for  example,  who  would 
conclude  at  once,  that  the  lady  who  had  ne- 
glected calisthenics,  or  the  prescribed  walks 
and  rides  attended  to  by  others,  had  entirely 
neglected  all  physical  education.  And  yet  it 
maybe  true,  that  a  young  lady,  by  a  diligent 
and  faithful  performance  of  household  duties, 
has  actually  been  pursuing  a  most  profitable 
course  of  physical  education,  and  has  actual- 
ly acquired,  by  these  labors,  bodily  health  and 
strength. 

So  in  regard  to  intellectual  education.  The 
various  studies,  to  which  the  attention  is  di- 
rected, are  regarded  as  the  means  of  educa- 
tion, because  they  are  supposed  to  aid  in 
drawing  out  the  iitellectual  powers  into  free 
and  full  exercise,  and  so  developing  and 
strengthening  them.  You  will  notice  here 
that  the  various  studies  of  childhood  are  the 
means  to  be  employed,  intellectual  strength 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.      107 

and  development  are  the  objects  to  be  attain- 
ed. It  is  frequently  the  case,  that  you  see 
a  person,  who  has  enjoyed  but  few  opportuni- 
ties for  an  acquaintance  with  books  and  with 
the  studies  of  childhood.  And  such  a  one  is 
often  spoken  of  as  a  person  of  little  or  no  ed- 
ucation. And  yet,  if  you  look  at  the  intellec- 
tual character,  you  will  find  that  the  mental 
powers  are  in  full  and  free  exercise,  and  have 
acquired  great  strength  and  development. 
The  result,  aimed  at  in  all  studies,  has  actu- 
ally been  obtained,  although  the  mode  of  ob- 
taining it  has  been  different  Irom  that  usually, 
prescribed.  And  how,  it  is  asked, is  this?  I 
answer,  the  result  is,  in  all  cases,  obtained  by 
the  exercise  of  the  mind.  It  does  not  de- 
pend upon  the  particular  subject,  about  which 
the  mind  is  exercised.  For  example,  one 
young  lady  is  a  pupil  in  a  high  school,  and 
her  attention  is  directed  to  the  study  of  Gram- 
mar, Rhetoric,  Logic,  Mathematics,  and,  it 
may  be,  to  ancient  and  modern  languages. 
But  why  is  her  attention  directed  to  these? 
One  reason  is,  that  the  knowledge  acquired 
by  these  studies  is  itself  important.  The 


108  rouNO  LADY'S  AID. 

knowledge  of  Grammar  and  Rhetoric  will  en- 
able her  to  understand  more  fully,  and  to  ap- 
preciate more  justly  the  beauties  of  what  she 
may  afterwards  read.  And  so  all  the  various 
branches  are  valuable  in  reference  to  future 
improvement.  But,  still,  the  principal  reason 
is,  that,  while  engaged  in  these  studies,  she  is 
exercising,  strengthening  and  developing  the 
mental  powers.  In  the  pursuit  of  these  stu- 
dies, the  judgment  is  exercised,  discrimina- 
tion, nice  and  careful  discrimination  is  called 
for — the  individual  is  accustomed  to  think, 
to  weigh,  to  examine,  to  judge.  And  then, 
too,  the  taste  is  refined  and  purified;  in  this 
\vay  valuable  results  are  secured.  But  anoth- 
er young  lady  is  deprived  of  these  high  priv- 
ileges and  cannot  attend  to  these  important 
studies.  She  is  comparatively  in  indigent 
circumstances.  She  is  called  upon  to  plan 
and  contrive,  in  order  to  make  a  little  go  as 
far  as  it  can,  to  make  the  best  appearance 
which  can  be  made  with  limited  means,  to  ex- 
ercise her  own  taste  in  regard  to  her  dress. 
The  consequence  is,  that  she  thinks,  exam- 
ines, weighs,  judges;  her  discrimination,  her 
7 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPOVEMENT.     109 

forethought  are   called    into  exercise.     Her 
sense  of  propriety,  her  tastes  are   exercised. 
She  is  accustomed  to  self-reliance,  to  put  forth 
and  to  depend  upon  her  own  individual  ener- 
gy.    In  this  way,  it  often  happens,   that    the 
most  valuable  results  are  obtained,  the  essen- 
tial object,  a  well  developed  and  well  balanc- 
ed mind,  is  secured,  although  she  has  not  been 
permitted  to  attend    to  the   various    branches 
of  school  study.     Nay,  more,  I    have   often 
noticed,  that  some  ladies,  who   have  not  en- 
joyed the  advantages  of  a  school  and   a   book 
education,  have,  in  the  duties  and  actual   em" 
ergencies  of  after  life,  manifested  a  more  ap^ 
propriate    developement  of  mind,  a  greater 
strength  of  judgement,  and  discrimination, and 
self-reliance,  and  self-guidance  than  many  oth^ 
ers,  who  have    enjoyed  the    best  advantages,, 
and  pursued  the  greatest  number  of  studies. 
And  why  so  ?     Because  their  minds  had  been 
exercised  in  early  life  upon  its  trials  and  dutiea 
in  precisely  the  same  way  in  which  they  wero 
railed  to  exert  themselves    in  after  life.     But 
those  with  whom  they  have  been    compared, 
although  they  have  attended  to  many  studies,, 
10 


110  YOUNG   LADY'S  AID. 

have  not  attended  to  them  in  the  most  profit- 
able manner,  they  have  relied  too  much  upon 
authority  and  exercised  their  own  discrimina- 
tion and  self-reliance  too  little.  Thus,  you 
perceive  that  in  its  true  and  proper  sense  ed- 
ucation means  the  drawing  out  into  free  and 
full  exercise,  the  developing  in  a  proper  de- 
gree, and  in  just  proportions  the  various  pow- 
ers and  capacities  of  our  natures,  and  that  if 
this  be  actually  dbne,  it  is  not  essential  by 
what  studies  and  exercises  it  be  accomplish- 
ed, whether  by  the  studies  of  school  or  by  the 
various  trials  and  duties  and  efforts  of  actual 
life. 

But  why,  you  may  ask,  do  I  say  all  this  ? — • 
Am  I  decrying  an  education  at  school  and 
by  means  of  books?  By  no  means.  I  have 
made  the  remarks,  which  I  have  thus  far  of- 
fered, for  two  reasons.  First,  while  I  would 
have  every  young  lady  avail  herself  of  all  the 
advantages  which  may  be  within  her  reach, 
in  the  way  of  schools  and  books,  I  would  have 
her  understand  that  her  improvement  does 
not  depend  solely  upon  these  books  and 
schools  and  teachers,  but  upon  the  manner 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.      Ill 

in  which  she  exercises  her  own  mind  in  re- 
gard to  them.  A  young  lady  may  have  the 
advantage  of  the  best  schools  in  the  land,  and 
may  pass  over  a  great  variety  of  the  most  val- 
uable and  important  studies,  and  yet  be  but 
poorly  educated  at  last.  Because  she  may 
depend  too  much  upon  authority,  may  take 
things  upon  trust,  and  exercise  only  her  mem- 
ory. She  may  not  think  for  herself,  or  form 
habits  of  reflection.  She  may  not  discrimi- 
nate nicely  and  judge  carefully.  Thus,  you 
perceive,  that  such  a  one  may  not  only  pass 
over  a  great  variety  of  important  studies,  but 
so  far  as  mere  recitations  and  examinations 
are  concerned,  she  may  be  distinguished — 
may,  by  her  parrot-like  rehersal  from  memory 
and  by  rote,  actually  excel,  and  yet  be  at  last 
but  poorly  educated.  My  first  reason  for  the 
remarks,  which  I  have  offered,  I  repeat,  is  to 
impress  upon  the  minds  of  those  young  ladies 
who  are  now  favored  with  high  privileges,  the 
importance  of  a  right  manner  of  improving 
them.  It  depends,  young  ladies,  on  your- 
selves and  not  on  the  reputation  of  the  school 
you  may  attend,  on  the  manner  in  which  you 


112  YOUNG 

pursue  your  studies,  rather  than  on  the  par- 
ticular studies  themselves  which  you  may  pur- 
sue, whether  you  shall  be  well  educated  or 
not.  Do  you  study  English  Grammar  ?  You 
should  remember  that  this  is  only  a  key  to  un- 
lock all  the  philosophy  of  language,  and,  that 
the  philosophy  of  language  is  only  an  outward 
manifestation  of  the  philosophy  of  mind.  If 
then  you  study  English  Grammar,  as  it  should 
be  studied,  and  look  from  the  technical  forms 
of  Grammar  into  all  the  peculiarities  of  lan- 
guage, and  from  these  into  the  various  opera- 
lions  of  the  mind,  which  are  thus  manifested, 
you  will  be  studying  in  reality  the  philosophy 
of  the  human  mind.  You  will  be  taught,  as 
you  do  this,  to  turn  your  thoughts  inward  and 
watch  the  operations  of  your  own  minds,  as 
indicated  by  the  language  you  use,  and  to  ex- 
ercise the  habit  of  observation  in  regard  to 
the  mental  processes  of  others  as  you  listen 
to  their  conversation. 

In  this  mode  of  studying  English  Grammar, 
you  perceive  you  will  be  exercising  and  de- 
veloping your  own  mind.  But  there  is  a  dif- 
ferent way  of  pursuing  this  study.  I  have 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     1  13 

seen  those,  who  professed  to  be  skilled  in 
this  department,  and  who  yet  never  appeared 
to  have  thought  of  the  philosophy  of  either 
language  or  mind.  They  look  upon  the  rules 
of  Grammar,  not  as  the  simple  expression  of 
the  principles  involved  in  the  very  philoso- 
phy of  mind  and  of  language,  but  as  the  arbi- 
trary creations  of  man;  and  the  application  of 
these  principL-s  they  regarded  as  the  clipping 
and  paring  down  and  shaping  of  language  to  a 
correspondence  with  these  arbitrary  creations. 
I  have  alluded  to  a  single  and  a  common 
branch  of  study  to  illustrate  my  position. — 
And  here  again  I  would  ask  you,  my  young 
friends,  to  remember,  and  to  practice  upon 
the  remembrance,  that  it  depends  upon  your- 
selves and  not  on  others,  on  the  manner  in 
which  you  pursue  your  studies,  rather  than 
on  the  studies  pursued — whether  your  school 
education  shall  be  to  you  valuable  or-  not. — 
And  this,  I  repeat,  is  the  first  reason  for  the 
remarks  which  I  have  offered.  My  second 
reason  is,  to  encourage  those  who  are  not  fa- 
vored with  opportunities  for  long  attendance 
at  school.  lam  aware,  my  young  friends, 

10* 


114  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

that  there  are  many  such  in  the  community. 
Young  ladies  of  fine  minds,  of  ardent  desires, 
and  these  desires  directed  to  intellectual  im- 
provement, but  who  are  compelled,  from  cir- 
cumstances, to  neglect  schools  and  books. — 
Such,  in  the  despair  of  their  souls,  are  ready 
to  give  up  all  efforts  at  self-improvement.  To 
all  such  I  would  speak  a  word  of  encourage- 
ment. Remember,  young  ladies,  that  the  re- 
sults and  not  the  means  of  education  are  the 
essential  things,  that  the  great  and  most  im- 
portant question  to  be  asked,  has  regard  to 
the  actual  development  of  the  mind,  and  not 
so  much  to  the  particular  branches  of  study 
employed  in  this  development.  Are  you 
called  to  the  continual  and  careful  exercise  of 
your  mind  for  your  own  support,  in  the  va- 
rious adjustment  of  efforts  to  ends,  in  all  the 
nicer  minutiae  of  household  duties?  Sustain 
yourselves  by  the  thought,  that  the  mental  ex- 
ercise, called  forth  by  these  particular  duties 
and  trials,  is  an  important  and  valuable  pro- 
cess of  education,  that,  if,  in  all  cases  you 
endeavor  to  discriminate  nicely,  and  to  exam- 
ine carefully,  and  to  judge  properly,  you  are 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     115 

exercising  and  developing  your  mind  in  a 
profitable  and  proper  manner.  And,  to  take 
the  illustration  already  employed,  the  study  of 
English  Grammar — suppose  you  have  had  no 
time  nor  opportunity  to  attend  to  its  techni- 
calities, yet,  by  reflecting  upon  what  you 
read,  comparing  one  passage  with  another,  by 
watching  the  peculiarities  and  beauties  of 
style,  and  of  thought,  you  may  become  most 
intimately  acquainted  with  the  philosophy  of 
language  and  of  thought.  You  may  have 
your  thoughts  turned  in  upon  your  own  men- 
tal operations,  and  the  results,  obtained  by  the 
study  of  English  Grammar,  may  be  yours. — • 
You  have  reached  them,  it  is  true,  by  a  dif- 
ferent process,  and  may  not  be  able  to  ex- 
press yourself,  in  regard  to  them,  in  technical 
language.  Yet  the  results,  the  knowledge  of 
the  philosophy  of  language  and  of  mind,  the 
exercise  and  development  of  your  own  men- 
tal powers,  may  be  yours.  Let  no  young  la- 
dy then,  be  discouraged  because  she  cannot 
pursue  the  same  courses  of  study  with  many 
of  her  mates.  She  has  a  mind,  the  improve- 
ment of  which,  although  it  may  be  advanced. 


116  YOUNG  LADY'S  AIO. 

yet  does  not  wholly  depend  upon  a  particular 
course  of  studies.  That  mind  she  carries 
with  her  wherever  she  goes,  and  she  can  ex- 
ercise it  upon  whatever  may  present  itself  to 
her  notice.  And  by  so  exercising  her  mind, 
she  can  strengthen,  develope  and  train  it  up 
for  usefulness  and  happiness.  Be  not  then,  I 
repeat,  discouraged.  Avail  yourselves  of  the 
privileges  that  may  be  within  your  reach,  im- 
prove carefully  the  opportunities  with  which 
you  may  be  favored,  and  ever  employ  your 
minds  upon  the  various  subjects  presented, 
whether  they  be  studies,  duties,  or  trials,  with 
much  care,  and  an  earnest  desire  for  improve- 
ment. In  this  way,  although  circumstances 
may  seem  adverse,  you  will  be  daily  improv- 
ing in  those  things  which  are  the  objects  of 
education.  But  I  hasten  to  my  next  topic. 

To  jne  it  seems  that  intellectual  develop- 
ment has  a  most  intimate  and  important  con- 
nection with  moral  and  spiritual  progress.  This 
connection  I  will  now  endeavor  to  poin  t  out. 
And  \\hat  is  moral  improvement,  on  what  is 
it  based,  and  how  is  it  promoted?  Moral 
improvement  is  improvement  in  the  right 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.       117 

understanding  of  moral  duties,  in  the  due  ap- 
preciations of  the  motives  which  may  move 
us  to  the  right  performance  of  these  duties, 
and  in  such  an  entire  devotion  to  them,  as 
will  result  in  the  skilful  performance  of  them. 
But  on  what  are  moral  duties  based?  Do 
they  not  grow  out  of  the  natures  we  have  re- 
ceived at  the  hands  of  God  and  of  the  relations 
which  we  sustain  to  our  fellow  men?  On 
what,  for  example,  is  the  duty  to  be  temper- 
ate in  all  things  based?  The  duty  of  govern- 
ing and  restraining  our  appetites  and  passions? 
Do  not  these  duties  grow  out  of  the  circum- 
stance that  we  are  created  moral  and  spiritual 
beings?  Experience  and  observation  prove 
that  indulgence  in  the  appetites,  not  only  be- 
numbs our  intellectual  powers,  but  blunts 
and  deadens  our  moral  sensibilities.  Such 
indulgence,  then,  is  wrong,  is  sinful.  For  it 
is  wrong  to  unfit  ourselves  by  the  indulgence 
of  our  appetities,  for  the  high  moral  efforts 
and  moral  purposes  for  which  we  were  creat- 
ed. Again,  experience  and  observation  prove 
that  the  indulgence  of  our  appetites,  deadens 
our  spiritual  capacities  and  affections.  Can 


118  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

you,  I  ask,  go  at  once  from  a  surfeiting  feast, 
to  your  closet  of  prayer,  with  any  well  groun- 
ded hope  that  you  will  be  enabled  to  engage 
in  that  exercise  with  true  fervor  and  heartfelt 
devotion.  Most  surely  not.  God  has  creat- 
ed us  with  animal  appetites.  These  are  giv- 
en us  as  the  means  of  guiding  us  to  those 
things  which  will  promote  the  health  of  our 
bodies.  He  has  created  us  with  intellectual 
capacities,  these  were  given  us  that  we  may 
study  out  and  understand  our  natures,  our 
rflations,  the  work?  and  ways,  the  character 
and  purposes'of  God.  He  has  created  us 
with  social  affections.  These  were  given  us 
*hat  we  may  enjoy  and  impart  both  happiness 
and  improvement  in  our  intercourse  with 
friends.  He  has  created  us  with  moral  sen- 
sibilities. These  were  given  us  to  guide  us 
into  the  path,  and  to  urge  us  on  to  the  faith- 
ful performance  of  duties.  He  has  created 
us  with  spiritual  capacities.  These  were  giv- 
en us  that  we  may  hold  communion  with  the 
father  of  our  spirits.  In  the  perfect  character 
these  are  all  developed  in  their  due  and  pro- 
per proportions,  and  preserve  towards  each 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.  119 

other  their  proper  relations — and  consequent- 
ly the  improvement  of  each  tends  to  the  more 
appropriate  and  rapid  improvement  of  all  the 
others.  The  animal  appetites,  if  rightly  and 
properly  indulged,  promote  health  of  body, 
and  thereby  strengthen  us  for  greater  social 
enjoyment,  and  for  higher  intellectual  efforts. 
The  social  enjoyments  and  intellectual  efforts, 
when  indulged  in  and  put  forth  in  a  proper 
degree,  being  under  the  guidance  of  moral 
principles  and  susceptibilities,  afford  to  these 
appropriate  exercise,  and  consequently  serve 
to  develope  and  strengthen  them.  And  where 
the  tenderness  of  moral  susceptibilities  is  cul- 
tivated, and  the  strength  of  moral  principles 
is  increased,  and  purity  of  moral  character  is 
secured,  there  the  spiritual  and  devout  and 
holy  affections  rise  up  into  a  more  close  and 
intimate  communion  with  the  Father  of  spir- 
its. You  perceive,  therefore,  that  where 
the  appetites  are  indulged  to  excess,  the 
individual  is  unfitted  for  the  higher  and  holier 
exercises  of  his  spiritual  nature.  The  young 
lady  who  employs  her  intellectual  powers 
upon  vain  and  frivolous  pursuits,  unfits  her- 


120  YOUNG  LADY'S  MD. 

self  for  the  higher  enjoyment  of  spiritual  com- 
munion with  God.  Where  social  enjoyment, 
or  mere  intellectual  improvement,  are  made 
the  great  objects  of  life,  moral  improvement 
and  spiritual  progress  will  be  retarded.  But 
how  are  these  principles  of  human  nature  and 
their  mutual  relation  known?  Is  it  not  by  a 
process  of  intellectual  improvement?  Most 
surely  it  is!  And  now  what  is  the  effect  of 
this  intellectual  improvement?  Here  is  a 
devout  and  conscientious,  but  exceedingly  ig- 
norant Christian.  She  may  be  faithful  in  the 
discharge  of  duty,  because  she  fenrs,vvith  slav- 
ish dread,  that  positive  punishment  may  be 
indicted.  Suppose  her  to  be  enlightened  by 
a  process  of  intellectual  education.  Suppose 
her  to  understand  the  constitution  of  the  hu- 
man soul,  and  Jo  see  clearly  in  what  way  the 
faithful  performance  of  duty  promotes  spiritu- 
al improvement,  and  that  misery  is  not  an 
arbitrary  infliction  of  an  angry  sovereign,  but 
the  result  of  a  wise  and  merciful  adjustment 
of  the  constitution  of  our  natures.  Will  she 
not  see,  in  all,  the  work  of  infinite  love,  and 
seeing  this,  will  not  her  obedience  be  more 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.    121 

free  from  restraint,  from  slavish  dread?  Will 
she  not  be  now  drawn  to  the  faithful  perform- 
ance of  duty,  by  the  cords  of  love?  And  is 
not  this  a  more  powerful,  as  well  as  a  more 
pleasant  motive,  than  slavish  fear?  Tiius  you 
perceive,  that  the  simple  branch  of  school 
studies,  English  Grammar,  leading,  as  it  does, 
if  pursued  aright,  to  a  knowledge  of  the  phi- 
losophy of  mind,  aad  leading,  still  further,  as, 
by  reflection  and  personal  examination  it  may 
do,  to  a  knowledge  of  the  operations  of  your 
own  mind,  may  be  instrumental  in  producing 
a  greater  reverence  for  your  own  spiritual  ca- 
pacities, a  better  understanding  of  the  grounds 
of  personal  duty,  and  in  presenting  new  and 
more  powerful  motives  to  faithfulness  and 
obedience,  may  thus  be  instrumental  in  pro- 
moting your  moral  improvement  and  your 
spiritual  progress. 

Take  another  class  of  duties,  belonging  to 
the  same  connection,  the  duties  of  love  and 
charity  to  others,  and  especially  to  those, who 
may  differ  from  you  in  religious  opinions. — 
The  ignorant  Christian,  who  is  conscientious- 
ly obedient  to  her  Master's  instructions,  will 
11 


122  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

undoubtedly  strive,  and  that  most  strenuously, 
to  perform  these  duties.  But  they  will  he 
performed  out  of  regard  to  what  is  considered 
a  positive  and  an  arbitrary  command.  But  if 
the  same  person  should  make  valuable  intel- 
lectual acquirements,  she  will  see  the  reason- 
ableness of  this  commanded  duty.  She  will 
understand  how  it  is,  that  from  the  differences 
in  the  construction  of  different  minds,  from 
early  education  and  prejudice,  from  viewing 
the  same  subject,  as  many  are  com  pelled  to 

view  it,  from  different  directions  minds  equal- 

•>fec 
ly  desirous  of  understanding   arid  obeying  the 

truth,  equally  honest,  sincere  and  devout,  in 
all  their  inquiries,  may,  and  often  do,  arrive 
at  different  conclusions.  Still  further,  she 
will  find  some  who  have  embraced  what  she 
regards  the  true  views  of  Christian  duty, 
holding  this  truth  in  unrighteousness.  And 
she  will  find  that  many,  whose  views  of 
Christian  truth  are  apparently  extremely  defec- 
tive, are  led  by  what  little  of  truth  they  do 
embrace,  to  maintain  pure  and  holy  lives. 
Now,  with  this  knowledge,  will  she  not  per- 
ceive the  rensonableness  of  the  duty?  Mill 


INTELLECTUAL,  IMPROVEMENT.     123 

not  her  motives  be  much  stronger  than  before? 
Thus  you  per^ye  that  those  branches  of 
knowledge,  which  relate  to  the  nature,  oper- 
ations and  philosophy  of  the  human  mind, 
may  be  instrumental  of  moral  improvement 
and  spiritual  progress. 

And  now  turn  your  thoughts  to  natural  sci- 
ence. Suppose  two  young  ladies  walk  out, 
and  as  they  walk,  their  attention  is  directed 
to  the  glorious  luminary  of  day,  or  to  the 
fair  queen  of  night,  with  her  starry  hosts. 
The  one  is  ignorant.  She  only  gazes  upon 
these  wonderful  objects  with  a  wild  stare  of 
amazement  —  wiih  feelings  of  superstitious 
dread,  or  "in  utter  indifference  ,  as  at  some- 
thing common,  every  day  occurrence,  and 
not  worthy  of  particular  attention.  The  oth- 
er young  lady  has  acquired  some  good  degree 
of  acquaintance  with  the  science  of  astrono- 
my, and  to  her,  every  change  in  the  appear- 
ance of  the  sun  or  moon, every  twinkliugstar, 
is  instinct  with  life,  light  and  intelligence.  She 
looks  upon  them  all  as  the  handy  works  of 
God,  and  she  understands  something  of  the 
wonderful  manifestation  there  is  in  them,  of 


124  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID 

wisdom,  power  and  goodness.  It  lias  been 
said  by  the  Royal  Psalmist  of  Israel,  that  'ihe 
heavens  declare  the  glory  of  God.'  To 
which  mind,  I  ask,  to  the  ignorant  or  to  the 
instructed  mind,  do  these  works  most  fully  de- 
clare this  glory?  Can  there  be  any  doubt? 
While  the  ignorant  young  lady  is  staring  in 
amazement,  or  tinning  away  in  indifference) 
the  mind  that  is  instructed,  is  filled  with  the 
thoughts  of  God,  her  affections  are  carried  up 
to  the  former,  and  sustainer  and  governor  of 
all  worlds,  and  she  is  ready, under  the  prompt- 
ing impulses  of  her  own  devout  feelings,  to 
exclaim  with  the  poet,  'An  undevout  astrono- 
mer is  mad.' 

Again,  suppose  our  heavens  to  be  spanned, 
as  they  sometimes  have  been,  by  the  beautiful 
arches,  or  the  earth  bathed  in  the  beautiful 
hues  of  the  Aurora  Borealis,  with  what  widely 
different  feelings  are  these  phenomena  view- 
ed by  the  ignorant  and  the  instructed.  The 
ignorant  gaze  with  mute  indifference  or  su- 
perstitious dread.  To  minds  nninstructed, 
these  things  may  appear  only  as  indications  of 
divine  wrath  and  portentious  omens  of  fulure 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.          125 

calamity.  But  the  mind  that  is  instructed, 
sees  in  these  same  phenomena,  only  a  beauti- 
ful and  heart  stirring  testimony  of  divine  love. 
Instead  of  shrinking  away  in  superstitious 
dread,  the  heart  leaps  for  joy — goes  forth  to 
meet  in  holy  meditation  the  God  in  whose 
hands  are  the  lightnings  of  heaven,  who  ri- 
deth  upon  the  whirlwind  and  governeth  the 
storms.  But,  if  the  science  of  astronomy 
thus  gives  to  the  mind  instructed  in  its  truths, 
such  clear,  forcible  and  vivid  views  of  God, 
as  the  ruler  of  all  worlds,  and  calls  forth  lively 
feelings  of  gratitude — it  must,  of  course,  pro- 
mote moral  improvement  and  spiritual  pro- 
gress. For  our  strongest  motives  to  the  per- 
formance of  moral  duties  are  those,  which 
are  based  upon  love  and  gratitude  to  God.  It 
must  promote  spiritual  progress,  for  it  calls 
Into  lively  and  active  exercise  the  very  feeling 
which  constitute  a  part  of  our  spiritual  exer- 
cises. And  the  sair.e  may  be  said  of  all  the 
natural  sciences.  To  her  who  is  acquainted 
with  entomology,  or  the  history,  characters 
and  habits  of  insects — every  fly  that  buzzes, 
every  insect  that  crawls,  every  spider  that 


120  YOUNG    LADY  S    AID. 

spins  its  web,  is  an  object  of  deep  interest, 
an  object  of  careful  observation,  an  object 
which  conveys  to  the  mind  much  instruction. 
To  her  who  is  acquainted  with  the  science  of 
botany,  every  flower  she  may  rear,  every  plant 
she  may  tend,  nay  mere,  every  worthless 
weed,  as  it  is  called  by  others,  is  an  object  of 
deep  interest,  and  of  heavenly  instruction. 
Those  beautiful  plants,  which  in  summer 
adorn  your  yards,  and  in  winter  your  parlors, 
may  not  only  contribute  to  the  gratification, 
of  a  pure  and  healthy  taste,  they  may  even 
become  living  mementos  for  God,  living  min- 
isters of  good,  ever  presenting  to  you  new 
and  more  beautiful  proofs  and  manifestations 
of  God's  continued  presence,  agency  and 
goodness.  Thus  you  perceive  that  knowl- 
edge may  promote  moral  improvement  and 
spiritual  progress.  I  do  not  say  that  knovv  1- 
edge,  simply  in  itself  considered,  will  neces- 
sarily or  naturally  do  this.  What  I  say,  is  that 
when  viewed  through  a  Christian  medium,  it 
will  do  this.  And  you  will  remember,  that  I 
do  not  bring  forward  the  cultivation  of  knowl- 
edge as  a  preliminary  and  commencing  step, 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     127 

hut  as  what  should  he  added  to  the  essentials, 
faith  and  virtue,  as  what  is  to  be  cultivated  as 
next  in  importance  to  giving  the  heart  to  God, 
and  devoting  the  energies  to  moral  and  relig- 
ious self  cultivation.  In  this  subordinate 
place,  I  do  conceive  that  it  may  be  instru- 
mental in  promoting  our  moral  improvement 
and  our  spiritual  progress.  I  do  most  sin- 
cerely and  heartily  believe  that  the  more  our 
knowledge  is  increased,  the  deeper  and  strong- 
er and  more  influential  will  be  our  faith,  our 
trust,  our  devotion,  and  the  more  unreserved, 
free  and  cheerful,  will  be  our  obedience. — 
And  this  for  a  very  plain  and  obvious  reason. 
The  whole  universe  will  furnish  ministers  to 
our  religious  improvement.  Every  insect 
that  crawls,  every  bird  that  flies,  every  beast 
that  moves,  every  fish  that  swims,  every  flow- 
er that  blooms,  every  plant  that  grows,  every 
pebble  beneath  our  feet,  the  ocean  that  rolls, 
the  wind  that  blows,  the  clouds  that  fly  and 
drop  their  fatness  r.s  they  pass,  the  sun,  the 
moon,  the  stars  that  shine,  all,  all  these  come 
fraught  with  a  message  from  God  to  the  soul 
of  man.  But  ignorance,  on  the  other  hand, 


128  YOUNG    LADV's    AID. 

closes  all  these  streams  at  once,  and  shuts 
out  from  the  ear  the  still  small  but  powerful 
voice  of  natural  objects  and  mental  truths. 

I  have  thus,  my  friends,  endeavored  to  cor- 
rect some  wrong  impressions  upon  the  sub- 
ject of  education,  and  to  point  ont  the  con- 
nection between  intellectual  improvement  and 
moral  and  spiritual  progress.  It  remains 
that  I  direct  your  attention  to  one  thought 
more,  before  I  close,  a  thought,  which  might 
have  been  connected  with  my  first  position, 
but  which  I  preferred  to  reserve  for  this  sep- 
arate consideration,  that  so  I  might  give  it,  if 
possible,  a  more  distinct  representation,  and 
cause  it  to  make  a  deeper  and  more  vivid  im- 
pression. The  thougkt  is  this,  that  all  edu- 
cation is  for  eternity,  and  that  consequently 
there  is  no  limit  to  the  period  of  acquiring 
an  education  on  earth,  but  the  limit  of  life. 
No  one  has  completed  her  education  until 
she  has  closed  her  life.  This  thought  is 
highly  important  in  one  particular  aspect.  It 
shews  that  what  are  usually  regarded  even  as 
the  results  of  education,  are  to  be  looked  upon 
only  as  the  means  and  instruments  of  still  fur- 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPHOVEMENT.     129 

thcr  advances  eilhor  intellectual,  or  moral  and 
spiritual.      Are  you,  my    young    friend  about 
to  leave  school  with  the  thought  that  your  ed- 
ucation is  completed  ?     Let    me  show    you 
your  mistake,  and,  that,  instead  of  being  com- 
pleted, it  is  but  just  commenced.      What  have 
you  done  at  school  ?     You    have   acquired   a 
knowledge  of   language.     And    what   is    lan- 
guage,  but    the    manifestation  of  thought? — 
Words  without  thoughts  are  unmeaning  sym- 
bals.     We   value    words    because,    by   some 
strange  property  of  the  mind,  we  can,  as  we 
look  upon  the  printed  page,  learn    what  were 
the  thoughts  that  passed  through  another  mind 
in  past    ages  or   in  distant   lands.     Language 
then  is  the  instrument,  by    which    we    are  to 
make  ourselves  acquainted  with  the   thoughts 
of  those  who  lived  before  us  and  who  are    ab- 
sent from  us.     But,  in   studying    and    under- 
standing language  at  school,  a  young  lady  has 
only  learned  how  to  use  the  instrument.     Sup- 
pose, for  example,  that  a  young  lady  has  made 
herself  acquainted  will)  the  French    language 
at  school.     The  great  advantages  of  that  sc- 
nuisition    are   two.     8ho    has  exercised    her 


130  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

mind  in  a  peculiar  way  and  acquired  a  peculiar 
menial  habit,  and  then  she  has  learned  the  use 
of  a  key,  which  may  unlock  to  her  the  wealth 
of  the  whole  French  literature  and  science,  the 
wealth  of  minds  rich  in  thought  and  skilled  in 
science.  Now,  here  is  what  is  usually  regard- 
ed as  one  result  of  study.  The  result  is  that 
the  young  lady  is  acquainted  with  the  French 
language.  But  this  result,  you  perceive,  is 
to  be  regarded  only  as  the  means  of  still  far- 
ther advances,  only  as  the  means  of  an  ac- 
quaintance with  the  wide  range  of  French  lit- 
erature and  science.  But  here  you  may  say 
is  the  end  of  the  process  the  ultimate  and  fi- 
nal result.  By  no  means.  Of  what  value  is 
a  knowledge  of  French  literature  ?  Is  it  not 
that,  in  that  knowledge  we  find  food  for  our 
own  thoughts  and  inquiries  ?  By  our  own 
thoughts,  inquiries  and  reflections  we  find  our 
minds  strengthened  and  developed.  We  may 
correct,  in  our  own  conclusions,  errors  which 
we  discover  in  theirs. — We  may  follow  out 
trains  of  thought,  suggested  hy  them.  We 
may  advance  beyond  their  farthest  limits  in 
our  own  discoveries,  being  aic'ed  by  what  v\e 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.  131 

Inve  learned  of  their  discoveries.  In  this 
way,  you  perceive  that  a  knowledge  of  French 
science  and  literature,  which  by  many  would 
be  regarded  as  a  result,  is  in  reality  to  be  look- 
ed upon  only  as  a  means  for  further  progress 
and  higher  advances.  But,  to  carry  this  same 
branch  still  farther,  how  will  the  mental  im- 
provement, which  we  have  been  enabled  to 
make  by  our  knowledge  of  French  literature, 
serve  ns  a  means,  of  still  farther  advance- 
ment ?  I  answer  thai  the  individual,  who 
has  rna.le  this  improvement,  has  learned  much 
ol  the  nature  and  operations  of  the  human 
mind,  and  of  the  relations  which  are  sustained 
towards  the  infinite  and  eternal  spirit.  Con- 
sequently, she  can  see  more  clearly  the  vari- 
ous reasons  of  the  duties  required,  and  can 
feel  and  understand  the  force  of  the  obliga- 
tions which  are  upon  her.  She  has  more 
comprehensive  and  influential  views  of  God's 
wisdom  and  goodness.  She  sees  and  feels 
more  deeply  the  affinity  of  spirit  with  spirit, 
the  connection  of  the  finite  with  the  infinite. 
In  this  way,  all  her  own  mental  actions  and 
intellectual  improvement  may  be  the  means 


132  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

of  higher  moral  advances  and  greater  spiiit- 
ual  progress.  But  perhaps  you  may  say, 
young  ladies,  that  you  will  never  have  oppor- 
tunities for  following  out  a  particular  branch 
of  study  to  so  great  an  extent..  Perhaps  not. 
Let  us  take  then  an  illustration  of  a  different 
character.  Suppose  you  have  enjoyed  very 
few  advantages  for  intellectual  improvement, 
have  been  obliged  to  confine  your  attention  to 
household  duties  or  to  dirf-i  it  to  some  ap- 
propriate art  for  your  support  ?  Have  you 
confined  your  attention  to  household  duties 
and  become  skilled  in  ll  c:r  performance  ? — 
You  have  probably,  in  doing  this,  learned  to 
regard  these  as  duties,  n:;<!  have  formed  the 
habit  of  performing  well  all  duties.  Here 
then,  in  the  very  outset,  you  have  acquired 
the  means  of  further  improvement.  For, 
should  your  circumstances  change  as  they  un- 
doubtedly would,  and  your  "duties  undergo  a 
corresponding  change,  the  habit  which  you 
have  formed  while  about  your  household  du- 
ties, will  go  with  you  through  these  changes 
and  will  be  the  means  of  your  making  great 
and  rapid  improvement  from  the  various  chan- 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.  133 

• 

ges,  in  scenes  and  duties,  through  which  you 
may  pass.  Still  further,  your  correct  and  ap- 
propriate performance  of  household  duties, 
gives  you  the  power  of  conferring  pleasure  up- 
on others  and  of  contributing  to  their  happi- 
ness and  improvement.  It  may,  therefore,  be 
put  forth  as  a  manifestation  of  your  own  kind- 
ness of  heart,  and  by  exercising,  may  strength- 
en your  own  benevolent  feelings  and  affec- 
tions. In  addition  to  this,  there  is  in  the  dis- 
charge of  even  household  duties,  to  one  who 
strives  to  perform  them  in  the  best  possible 
manner,  a  good  and  healthy  exercise  of  the 
mind,  of  examination,  forethought,  reflection 
and  judgement.  Thus  you  see  that  knowl- 
edge and  skill  in  regard  to  household  duties, 
may  be  instrumental  of  intellectual,  moral  .and 
spiritual  advancement.  And  from  these  il- 
lustrations I  trust  that  you  will  perceive  that 
every  branch  and  every  step  of  education, 
while  it  may  be  regarded  as  the  result  of  the 
steps  which  precede,  should  also  be  regarded 
as  the  means  of  reaching  the  steps  which  are 
before,  and  instrumental  of  still  further  and  still 
higher  advances,  and  still  greater  progress. 
12 


134  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

In  this  respect,  the  thought  which  I  have 
last  suggested,  is  truly  important,  that  all  ed- 
ucation is  for  eternity;  that  no  education  is 
complete  until  this  life  is  swallowed  up  of 
death.  And  I  might  with  propriety  add,  that 
in  the  view  of  Christian  character  and  eternal 
happiness,  there  is  a  suhordination  in  the  dif- 
ferent parts  of  education.  The  true  Chris- 
tian will  desire,  and  strive  earnestly  for  intel- 
lectual improvement.  But  she  will  ever  val- 
ue intellectual  improvement,  not  so  much  on 
its  own  account,  as  because  it  may  he  the 
means  of  moral  improvement.  She  will  strive 
strenously  for  the  improvement  of  her  moral 
character.  But  it  will  be  principally  because 
she  is  satisfied  that  the  more  pure  her  moral 
character  msy  become,  the  higher  will  her 
devout  affections  and  spiritual  aspirations  rise; 
and  the  greater  will  be  her  religious  progress. 

Yes,  my  friends,  ihe  thought  that  all  edu- 
cation is  for  eternity,  is  one  of  vast  impor- 
tance, and  it  gives  to  all  the  parts  and  branch- 
es and  modes  of  pursuing  education,  a  vast 
importance,  an  importance,  which  may  be 
felt,  but  which  cannot  be  described.  You 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.  135 

have  all  read  of  the  accession  to  the  throne 
of  England  of  Princess  Victoria,  and  of  the 
care  with  which  her  mother  educated  her,  in 
view  of  her  possible  elevation  to  that  rank. 
Now,  would  you  not  all  feel,  that  the  cir- 
cumstance, that  a  young  lady  is  to  be  placed 
in  so  important  a  station,  gave  to  all  the  parts 
and  branches  and  modes  of  pursuing  her  ed- 
ucation a  vast  importance?  Would  you  not 
feel  that  whatever  others  who  were  preparing 
only  for  the  ordinary  walks  of  life  might  do, 
it  would  be  of  the  utmost  importance  for  her 
to  be  educated  in  the  most  perfect  manner 
possible?  But  what  is  the  throne  of  England, 
with  all  its  elevation,  and  splendor  and  influ- 
ence, so  far  as  the  individual  is  concerned, 
compared  with  the  eternal  interests  of  an  in- 
dividual's own  soul?  Is  it  not,  then,  much 
more  important  that  she,  who  is  educating  her 
soul  for  eternity,  should  endeavor  to  train  it 
up  in  the  most  perfect  manner?  This,  young 
ladies,  is  a  view  which  may  be  brought  home 
to  your  own  cases.  When  you  think  only  of 
the  future  duties  of  life,  you  may  say  in  re- 
gard to  any  branch  or  any  mode  of  pursuing 


136  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

your  education,  this  is  of  no  great  importance, 
it  lias  reference  only  to  the  unimportant  scenes 
and  duties  of  ordinary  life.  With  this  feeling 
you  will  be  in  danger  of  neglecting  your  in- 
tellectual improvement,  or  of  pursuing  it  in 
an  improper  and  unprofitable  manner.  But 
when  you  consider  that  carelessness  in  the 
studies  of  intellectual  education,  may  induce 
liabits  of  carelessness  in  regard  to  moral  char- 
acter, and  that  carelessness  in  regard  to  moral 
character,  may  utterly  prevent  all  spiritual  im- 
provement, and  that  the  want  of  spiritual  im- 
provement will  unfit  for  the  enjoyment  of 
heavenly  happiness,  then  will  you  feel  that  it 
is  of  infinite  importance  to  avoid  this  careless- 
ness in  the  studies  of  intellectual  education. 
Oh,  then,  dwell  upon  the  thought  which  I 
have  presented,  that  all  education  is  for  eter- 
nity. For,  if  you  dwell  upon  this  thought, 
you  cannot,  you  will  not  waste  the  precious 
season  with  which  you  are  favored.  You  will 
ever  and  in  all  circumstances  of  life,  be  seek- 
ing intellectual,  moral  and  spiritual  improve- 
ment. And  are  any  of  you,  my  friends,  so 
circumstanced  that  the  study  of  books  must  be 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.      137 

neglected?  Consider  I  beseech  you,  that  in 
every  struggle  with  trial  and  difficulty  and  temp- 
tation, your  intellectual  power  is  increased, 
while  at  the  same  time  and  by  the  same  effort, 
your  moral  principles  are  strengthened  and 
your  heavenward  aspirations  rendered  more 
fervent.  So  if,  in  the  face  of  opposition  un- 
der temptation^  or  indeed  in  any  circumstances 
you  persevere  in  the  performance  of  duty,  you 
will  find  your  mental  poweis,  your  moral  sen- 
sibilities strengthened.  You  will  be  contin- 
ually making  perceptible  progress  and  at  each 
step  you  wiJ|l  gain  strength  for  still  further  and 
more  vigorous  efforts.  Thus  your  intellectual, 
moral  and  spiritual  education  will  be  continual- 
ly making  progress.  They  will  go  on  hand 
in  hand  in  mutual  hacmony,  and  with  mutual 


12* 


LETTER  V. 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT. 

Recapitulation  of  the  last  letter — the  importance  of 
acquiring  a  taste  for  reading — Improvement  by  read- 
ing depends  not  so  much  upon  the  amount  read  as 
upon  the  manner  of  reading — Important  to  read 
slowly — with  much  thought  and  reflection,  and  self- 
application — Improvement  in  reading  depends  not 
so  much  upon  the  amount  as  upon  the  character  of 
what  is  read — Five  specific  objections  against  novel 
reading — Works  of  imagination  sometimes  impor- 
tant to  verify  general  conclusions,  or  to  illustrate 
abstract  truths — Reviews  and  other  light  reading  of 
the  kind  should  be  taken  up  only  occasionally — The 
principle  reading  should  be  of  a  solid  character — 
The  reading  of  the  Bible  urged — Some  hints  in  re- 
gard to  the  manner  of  reading  the  sacred  volume — 
Importance  of  the  habit  of  observation — Suggestions 
on  amusements  and  their  influence  upon  intellectual 
and  moral  improvement — Conclusion. 

My  YOUNG  FRIENDS: 

In  my  last  letter,  I  endeavored  to    point 
out  what  I  conceived  to  be  important    princi- 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     139 

pies  upon  the  subject  of  intellectual  improve- 
ment, and  to  shew  the  connection  between 
intellectual  development  and  moral  and  spir- 
itual progress.  The  particular  suggestions 
of  my  letter  were  these  three.  First,  that 
the  great  object  of  education  is  to  draw  out, 
exercise  and  develope  the  various  faculties  of 
our  nature,  that  books  and  studies  are  the 
means  of  accomplishing  this  object,  but  that, 
as  the  strength  and  development  of -the  men- 
tal powers  depend  upon  the  actual  exercise  of 
the  mind  itself,  rather  than  upon  the  particu- 
lar studies  and  subjects  about  which  the  mind 
is  exercised,  it  sometimes  happens,  that  those 
who  are  deprived  of  books  and  of  study,  do, 
by  a  similar  exercise  of  their  minds  upon  the 
actual  duties  and  trials  of  life,  obtain  the  same 
or  similar  valuable  results  with  others,  and, 
consequently,  that  those  young  ladies  who  en- 
joy great  advantages  should  remember,  that 
the  value  of  their  education  will  depend  upon 
their  own  faithfulness  in  the  right  exercise  of 
their  minds,  rather  than  upon  the  high  char- 
acter of  the  advantages  which  they  enjoy, 
while  those,  who  are  deprived  of  these  priv- 


|4Q  XOCNC  LADY'S  AID 

ileges,  may  be  encouraged  to  seek  for  the 
same  results,  in  rightly  meeting  the  trials  and 
rightly  discharging  the  duties  of  life.  This  I 
say,  was  the  first  suggestion. 

My  second  was,  that  all  knowledge,  and  all 
intellectual  improvement,  if  looked  upon  in 
the  light  of  Christianity,  aiad  applied  under 
the.  influence  of  Christian  principle,  may  be- 
come the  instrument  of  aioral  improvement' 
and  spiritual-  progress,  by  making  known  to  us 
the  gBou-ndiS  of  duly,  and  setting  before  us 
stronger  motives  for  its  performance.  Such  was 
my  second  suggestion. 

My  third  was,  that  all  education  is  educa- 
tion for  eternity,  and  that,  consequently,  the 
intellectual  development  and  the>  intellectual 
acquirements,  which  are  usually  regarded  as 
the  results  of  education,  are  to  be  regarded, 
in  view  of  eternity,  but  as  the  means  and  in- 
struments of  still  further  progress  in  intellectu- 
al, moral  and  spiritual  improvement,  and  that 
there  is  no  limit  en.  earth  to  the  period  of  ac- 
quiring an  education,  but  the  close  of  life  itself. 

I  propose,  in  this  letter,  to  speak  of  the 
means  of  securing  intellectual  improvement, 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.          141 

and  of  some  of  the  hindrances,  which  are  to 
be  encountered  in  (he  attempt.  And  I  would 
first  offer  some  remarks  upon  the  suhject  of 
reading  in  its  influence  upon  intellectual  im- 
provement. I  feel  that  I  ought  to  urge  upon 
your  attention  the  importance  of  acquiring  a 
taste  for  useful  reading,  as  one  of  the  greatest 
safe-guards  to  your  future  character,  one  of 
the  most  fruitful  sources  of  happiness  and  im- 
provement. I  have  seen  young  ladies,  who 
had  heen  so  accustomed  to  live  upon  outward 
excitement,  that  they  were  most  miserably 
wretched,  when  left  to  themselves.  They 
were  in  possession  of  no  inward  resources  of 
happiness.  They  had  been  accustomed  to 
look  without  for  all  their  enjoyment,  and  con- 
sequently, all  within  was  an  empty  void.  In 
society  they  are  perhaps  the  liveliest  of  the 
lively.  All  with  mem,  at  such  times,  is  noisy 
rnirth  and  boisterous  merriment.  They  are 
not  only  full  of  life  and  animation  themselves, 
but  they  breathe  life  and  animation  into  all 
around  them,  they  are  the  life  of  the  whole 
circle  where  they  are.  Such  they  are,  when 
placed  amid  outward  circumstances  calculated 


142  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

to  excite  them.  But  when  by  themselves, 
when  left  alone,  all  this  life  and  animation 
gives  place  to  uneasiness,  to  murmuring  and 
fretting,  or  settled  gloom.  They  seem  not  to 
know  that  there  may  be  happiness  in  quiet 
cheerfulness,  that  it  is  possible  for  one  to  find 
sources  of  happiness  iu  her  own  reflections 
and  meditation  and  reading.  And,  having 
secured  no  resources  of  happiness  within 
themselves,  they  are  ever  wandering  abroad 
in  its  pursuit.  Gadding,  calling,  visiting,  or 
receiving  visits,  any  thing  is  welcomed  as  a 
relief  from  the  tedium  of  mental  vacuity. 
Such  young  ladies  I  have  seen.  And  when  I 
have  seen  them,  I  have  felt  the  importance 
of  securing  resources  of  happiness  within  one's 
self.  I  would,  then,  urge  the  importance  of 
acquiring  a  taste  for  useful  reading  with  this 
view,  as  a  resource  of  happiness  within  your- 
selves. If  you  acquire  this  taste  for  useful 
reading,  you  need  not  often  be  alone.  Your 
companions  of  your  own  age,  your  ordinary 
associates  may  be  far  away.  But  still,  you 
may  ha*e  vrith  you  the  writings  of  the  distin- 
guished of  past  ages.  Sages  and  philosophers, 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     143 

wise  men  and  devout  men,  may  thus  be  your 
companions,  your  associates  in  these  solitary 
hours,  as  they  are  usually  called.  With  their 
minds  you  may  hold  communion.  You  may 
listen  to  their  communications  and  meditate 
upon  their  instructions.  You  need  not  be 
alone.  You  never  need  lack  for  resources  of 
happiness  within  yourselves.  Then,  too,  use- 
ful reading  furnishes  pure  and  profitable 
thoughts  to  the  mind,  and  excites  amiable, 
and  pleasant,  if  not  holy  affections  in  the  heart, 
and  thus  furnishes  you  with  an  ever  ready 
source  of  enjoyment  and  improvement.  A 
striking  thought,  for  example,  may  be  sugges- 
ted, which  will  give  rise  to  a  long  train  of  re- 
flections, and  thus,  hours  may  be  pleasantly 
and  profitably  spent  in  company  with  the  good 
thoughts  of  others.  So  a  pure  emotion  may 
be  excited,  which  is  connected  with  a  long 
train  of  pure  and  holy  affections,  and  thus  time 
may  be  passed  pleasantly  and  profitably,  in 
comrnunings  of  soul  and  heart,  with  the  wise 
and  pure  of  p;ist  ages,  when  you  are  prevent- 
ed from  enjoying  the  society  of  companions 
of  your  own.  I  would  then  urge  upon  every 


144  YOUNG    LADY'S  AID. 

young  lady,  who  may  read  these  pages,  the 
importance  of  acquiring  a  taste  for  useful  read- 
ing, as  a  resource  of  happiness,  independent, 
in  some  degree,  of  outward  associates.  You 
cannot  expect  always  to  be  placed  amid  out- 
ward excitement.  There  must  be  times, 
when  you  will  be  by  yourselves,  and  when,  if 
you  have  no  resources  of  happiness  within 
yourselves,  you  must  be  most  miserably 
wretched,  And  then,  too,  if  you  could  hope 
to  live  always  amid  outward  excitement,  it 
would  lose  its  power  over  you.  Should  you 
be  spared  to  old  age,  you  must  then  be  wretch- 
ed. If  then,  my  young  friends,  you  would 
have  resources  of  happiness  within  yourselves 
so  as  to  be  independent,  in  some  degree,  of 
outward  circumstances — if  you  would  lay  up 
a  fund  upon  which  you  may  draw  in  seasons 
when  you  are  left  solitary — and  especially 
when  the  period  of  old  age,  with  all  its  de- 
crepitude and  helplessness,  shall  arrive — ac- 
quire, I  beseech  you,  a  taste  for  useful  reading. 
I  might  say  more  upon  the  importance  of  this 
— but  I  hope  to  set  forth  that  importance  in  a 
more  discriminating  manner,  in  the  further 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPUOVE3IEXT.  145 

and  more  definite  remarks  I  propose  to  ofTer, 
upon  the  most  profitable  modes  of  reading. 

I  would  remark  then,  that  the  real  improve- 
ment, to  be  derived  from  reading,  does  not 
depend  so  much  upon  the  amount  which  you 
read,  as  upon  the  manner  in  which  you  read. 
There  is  a  taste  for  reading  and  a  habit  of 
reading,  which  are  of  no  great  value  eithur  as 
the  means  of  improvement  or  as  a  resource  of 
happiness.  A  person  may  have  acquired  such 
a  taste  for  reading  as  to  devour  greedily  and 
rapidly  every  hook  that  may  fall  in  her  way. 
And  consequently  she  may  be  able  to  tell,  at 
the  close  of  the  year,  of  the  vast  amount  of 
her  reading.  She  may  be  deeply  interested 
while  she  reads,  and  may  even  remember, 
with  a  good  degree  of  accuracy,  what  she  has 
read.  And  yet,  if  this  be  all,  she  may  derive 
no  great  profit  from  her  reading.  Its  cfTect 
may  be  that  of  mere  passive  excitement,  ai.d 
the  impression  made,  tray  he  only  upon  ihc 
memory.  Indeed,  I  have  sometimes  thouplir. 
that  improvement  is  as  often  prevailed  by 
reading  too  much,  ashy  reading  too  little.  It 
was  once  said,  by  a  distinguished  legal  gcn- 
13 


140  YOUN«  LAC*'*  in>. 

tleman,  in  giving  hints  to  a  student,  that  he 
had  not  himself  read  one  tenth  part  as  much 
law  as  an  inferior  lawyer  to  whom  he  referred, 
and  that  if  he  had  read  as  much,  he  should  iri 
all  probability  have  been  no  more  distinguish- 
ed than  the  gentleman  to  whom  he  alluded. — 
Whether  the  gentleman  ever  made  the  remark 
or  not  there  is  much  of  truth  and  sound  wis- 
dom in  the  remark  itself.  And  why  so  ? — - 
Because,  I  answer,  the  profit  derived  from 
books,  the  real  substantial  profit,  results,  not 
from  the  act  of  reading,  not  from  the  pleasure 
with  which  we  read,  not  even  from  the  accu- 
racy with  \\hichwe  remember  what  we  have 
read,  but  from  our  own  reflections  upon  the 
subjects  and  thoughts  presented  in  reading. 
Let  me  illustrate.  Here  are  two  young  ladies 
engaged  in  reading  the  memoirs  of  some  one 
of  distinguished  worth,  of  their  own  sex. — 
This  memoir,supposeit  to  be  those  Miss  Han- 
nah More,  or  of  Mrs.  Hemans,  this  memoir 
consists  of  a  narration  of  the  circumstances  and 
events  of  her  life,  of  the  various  changes 
hi  feeling  and  character  through  which  she 
p«s«ed,  end  of  the  various  scenes  in  which  she 


1NTKLLKCTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.  147 


mingled,  and  of  the  various  influences  to 
which  she  was  subjected.  The  simple  narra- 
tion, whether  it  be  in  the  words  of  the  com- 
piler or  in  the  correspondence  of  the  lady  her- 
self, is  interesting  to  both,  perhaps  to  both 
alike.  But  one  of  these  young  ladies  is  satis- 
fied with  this  interest,  which  has  been  excited 
<  —  with  the  mere  passive  pleasure,  which  she 
has  enjoyed.  Or,  if  she  goes  farther  than 
this,  she  is  satisfied  with  being  able  to  remem- 
ber and  relate  what  she  has  read.  She  reads 
rapidly  and  is  soon  ready  to  lay  aside  the  book 
and  pass  with  equal  zest  to  another  and  a  dif- 
ferent one.  The  other  reads  slowly,  she  will 
wish  to  keep  the  book  weeks  instead  of  days. 
She  is  pleased  as  she  reads,  but  then  she 
wishes  to  pause,  from  time  to  time,  and  reflect 
upon  what  she  reads.  She  makes  the  sub- 
stance of  her  reading  the  subject  of  much  and 
frequent  thought  after  she  has  closed  her  book. 
jshe  scans  in  her  own  mind  the  various  parts 
of  the  character.  She  traces  actions  back  to 
motives,  and  notices  the  manner,  in  which  cir- 
cumstances and  motives  peculiarly  effect  the 
subject  of  jthe  memoir,  in  consequence  of  |iej; 


145  YOUNG  LADY'S  AJD. 

peculiar  natural  temperment,  or  early   educa- 
tion, or  acquiretl  prejudicies.     She  compares 
the  character,  of  which  she  is    reading,  with 
others  of  which  she  has   before  read,  or  with 
those,  with  which  she   has  been   acquainted. 
And  finally,  she  applies  what  she  reads  to  her- 
self,  to  her  own  circumstances,  temperment 
and  duties.     As  she  has  done  this,    she    has 
taken  up  the  book,  and  again  and  again  turned 
to  passages,  to  see  if  her  recollection  of  them 
be  accurate  and  her  inferences  from  them  just. 
She  does  all  this,   not  by  a  regular  process  of 
daily  devotion  to  reading  for   hours  at  a  time, 
but,  while  about  her  ordinary   household   du- 
ties.    It  may  be,  that,  after  the  morning  la- 
bors, she  finds  a  few   moments   to  read,  that, 
as  she  sits  plying  her  needle  of  an  afternoon, 
she  occasionally  turns  to  the  book  by  her  side 
to  re-examine  a  passage,   upon  which  she    is 
thinking,  or  that,  just  before    she   retires   she 
spends  a  few    moments  with   her    book.     In 
this  way,  although  she  may  read  slowly,   may 
seem  to  be  making  scarcely   perceptible   pro- 
gress, and  although  her  companion  may  have 
read  many  volumes  during  the  time,  yet   she 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.  149 

has  derived  great  profit  from  what  she  has 
read.  And  why  so  ?  Because,  I  answer, 
she  has  made  what  she  has  read  the  subject  of 
careful  thought,  long  continued  meditation, 
and  deep  reflection  after  she  has  closed  the 
book-  Thus,  my  friends,  you  perceive  that 
the  real,  substantial  profit  to  be  derived  from 
reading  depends,  not  so  much  upon  the  amount 
of  what  you  read,  as  upon  the  manner  in 
which  you  read,  in  other  words,  it  depends 
not  so  much  upon  reading  many  hooks,  as  it 
does  upon  your  making  the  substance  of  what 
you  read  the  subject  of  your  thoughts  after  the 
book  is  closed.  I  have  dwelt  the  more  care- 
fully upon  this  point,  because  I  am  address- 
ing those,  who  in  all  probability,  will  not  have 
time  and  opportunity  for  reading  many  books, 
and  who  are  sometimes  in  danger  on  that  ac- 

o 

count  of  neglecting  to  make  the  best  possible 
improvement  of  the  few  books  which  they  can 
read,  and  because  I  wished  to  give  instruction 
adapted  to  your  future  circumstances.  Situ- 
ated as  most  of  you  probably  will  be,  so  that 
you  cannot  read  much,  with  minds  often  dis-. 
tracted  by  household  cares,  and  with,  b.o,dies 


150  TOUN.O  LADY'S  AJD 

fatigued  by  household  labors,  still,  if  you  are 
faithful  to  yourselves,  you  can  read  a  small 
portion  each  day,  and  by  making  the  sub- 
stance of  what  you  read  the  subject  of  muf-h 
thought  and  reflection-,  you  may  be  every  clay 
securing  much  real  and  substantial  profit  from 
what  little  you  do  read. 

I  must  here,  however,  guard  against  a  mis- 
take, into  which  my  remarks  may.  lead  you. — 
The  mistake  is,  that  of  reading  a  little  in  a 
great  variety  of  books.  You  may  under  the 
influence  of  this  mistake,  read  a  little  in  one 
book,  in  the  morning,  a  little  in  a  different 
book  in  the  afternoon,  and  a  little  in  a  third 
book  in  the  ev.ening.  And  these  different 
books,  it  may  be,  will  treat  of  entirely  dif- 
ferent subjects.  If  this  be  the  course  pur- 
sued, your  reading  will  distract  your  thoughts, 
and  you  will  be  prevented  from  that  long  and 
close  and  serious  reflection  upon  what  you 
read,  which  will  make  your  reading  profitable. 
Suppose,  for  example,  that  you  are  reading 
either  of  the  memoirs  to  which  I  have  allu- 
ded, let  it  be  the  principal  subject  of  your 
reading,  and  thought  and  reflection  until  you 


IKTILJLECTU^i.    UtPIiOVliMBHT,  151 

have  finished  the  book,  and  by  reflection  have 
inwardly  digested  what  you  have  read,  until 
you  have,  in  your  own  minds,  some  clear  and 
connected  views  of  the  character,  in  all  its 
peculiarities  and  principles,  until  you  have 
discovered  some  mode  of  applying  the  instruc- 
tion you  have  gathered  up,  to  the  improve- 
ment of  your  own  character.  So,  if  you  are 
reading  a  work  upon  morals,  upon  practical 
religion,  or  doctrinal  theology,  confine  your 
attention  and  your  thoughts  principally  to  that 
for  the  time  being.  You  may  read  but  little 
each  day,  but  by  thinking  and  reflecting  upon 
what  you  read,  your  reading  will,  from  day 
to  day,  be  connected,  and  by  having  well  di- 
gested what  you  have  read  upon  one  day,  you 
will  be  prepared  for  reading  more  profitably 
on  the  next.  Thus  much  would  I  say  in  re- 
gard to  the  manner  of  reading  and  of  making 
the  most  improvement  of  what  you  read. 

I  remark,  in  the  second  place,  that  the  in- 
tellectual and  moral  improvement,  to  be  de- 
rived from  reading,  depends,  not  so  much  up- 
on the  amount  of  your  reading,  as  upon  the 
character  of  what  you  read.  And  here  I 


153  YOUNO  LADY'S   AID 

would  enter  my  most  solemn  protest  against 
that  most  foolish  and  dangerous  practice,  into 
which  young  ladies  often  fall,  the  indiscrimi- 
nate reading  of  novels.  This  class  of  books 
is  so  rapidly  enlarged,  and  our  circulating  li- 
braries are  to  so  great  an  extent  filled  with 
them — for  circulating  libraries  must  be  filled 
with  what  the  public  taste  demands— that  they 
crowd  themselves  upon  the  attention,  always 
presenting  something  new,  and  for  the  most 
part,  something  fascinating,  and  many  fall  vic- 
tims to  their  evil  influences.  But  what,  you 
may  ask,  are  the  specific  objections  to  novel 
reading  ?  I  answer, 

1st.  That  the  representations,  which  they 
give  are  too  highly  wrought.  Their  scenes  of 
distress  are  entirely  different,  in  degree  at 
least,  from  any  thing,  which  you  see  in  real 
life.  The  virtues,  which  they  depict,  are  dis- 
tinguished, signal,  striking  virtues,  such  as 
you  do  not  meet  with,  in  the  common,  every 
day  scenes  of  life.  And,  consequently,  the 
knowledge  which  you  get,  or  suppose  you  are 
getting  of  mankind  and  of  human  nature,  is 
only  a  knowledge  of  the  pictures  of  the  wri- 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     153 

ter's  imagination,  it  is  not  a  knowledge  of 
mankind,  and  of  human  nature,  as  it  appears 
around  you,  in  the  common  and  every  day 
walks  of  life.  The  effect  of  this  is,  that  it 
lends  your  mind  off  upon  a  wrong  tract,  in  a 
a  wrong  direction,  excites  unfounded  expec- 
tations in  regard  to  human  nature,  and,  thus 
shuts  up  the  mind  against  a  simple  and  profit- 
able observation  of  men  as  they  appear  around 
you.  This,  then,  is  my  first  objection  to  ihe 
indiscriminate  reading  of  novels. 

2d.  My  second  objection  is,  that  they 'are 
the  most  difficult  books  to  read  profitably.  I 
have  pointed  out  what  I  conceive  to  be  the 
most  profitable  way  of  reading,  that  is,  to  read 
slowly  and  pause  often,  and  reflect  long  upon 
what  you  read.  And  now,  I  appeal  to  those 
of  you  who  are  familiar  with  novel  reading, 
and  ask  if  your  own  experience  does  not  tes- 
tify that  novels  are  the  most  difficult  of  all 
books  to  be  read  in  this  way  ?  Does  not 
your  highly  excited  interest  in  the  plot,  your 
anxiety  to  know  the  issue — do  not  these,  I 
ask,  carry  you  forward  with  great  rapidity  ? 
Is  it  not  often  the  case,  that  your  reading  is 


154  rouxo    LADY'S  AID. 

only  skipping  along  from  place  lo  place,  read- 
ing just  enough  to  catch  the  story?  And, 
when  you  have  closed  the  book,  what  is  fixed 
in  your  memory,  the  simple  outlines  of  the 
story  merely,  or  the  peculiarities  and  princi- 
ples of  character  ?  Do  these  books  excite 
and  aid  you  to  form  habits  of  reflection  ?  I 
am  well  satisfied  that  any  young  lady  who 
really  wishes  to  read,  in  the  way  which  I  have 
pointed  out,  with  much  thought  and  reflection 
will  find  it  more  difficult  to  effect  this,  in  read- 
ing novels  than  in  reading  any  other  books. 
She  will  find  it  somewhat  difficult  to  form  this 
habit  under  any  circumstances  and  with  all 
the  helps  she  may  obtain.  But  she  will  find, 
lhat  the  indiscriminate  and  excessive  reading 
of  novels,  will  not  only  afford  her  no  assistance, 
but  will  exert  a  powerful  influence  in  opposi- 
tion to  this  habit,  And  this  is  my  second  ob- 
jection to  this  kind  of  reading, 

3d.  My  third  objection  is,  that  they  e^- 
ciie  a  distaste  for  reading  of  a  more  seriona 
and  profitable  character,  and  unfit  the  mind  far 
a  right  improvement  of  serious  reading  nnd 
conversation.  How  often  is  it  the  case,  that 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.        153 

Ihe  novel  reader  lays  down,  in  disgust,  or  only 
yawns  over  the  most  serious  and  valuable 
books  than  can  be  put  into  her  hands,  books 
rich  in  thought  and  beautiful  in  style,  books 
calculated  to  excite  thought  and  afford  food 
for  meditation.  Nothing  but  what  will  pro* 
duce  an  almost  feverish  excitement,  and  carry 
her  with  railroad  rapidity,  over  the  course, 
has  any  charms  for  her.  And  should  she,  by 
dint  of  perseverance,  read  a  serious  book, 
there  will  be  no  habits  of  reflection,  no  trains 
of  association,  that  are  in  accordance  with 
what  she  reads.  And  consequently,  she  will 
derive  but  little  profit  from  her  reading.  And 
this  is  my  third  objection,  that  it  produces  a 
distaste  lor  more  serious  and  profitable  read- 
ing. Perhaps  the  difficulty  here  lies  deeper 
and  extends  wider  than  even  the  distaste  for 
serious  reading.  It  may  be,  that  the  habit  is 
formed  of  seeking  for  pleasure  rather  than  for 
irnprovememt  in  reading,  a  habit,  which,  if 
once  fixed,  will  in  all  probability  extend  its 
withering  influences  over  the  whole  character, 
exciting  the  search  for  pleasure  rather  than 
inducing  devotion  to  duty. 


156  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

4th.     My  fourth  objection  is  that  the  indis- 
criminate  and    excessive    readinf  of  novels, 

t  O 

blunts  aud  deadens  the  finer  sensibilities  of 
our  nature.  I  will  illustrate  by  a  reference  to 
our  benevolent  feelings.  In  novels,  scenes  of 
distress  are  described,  highly  wrought,  deeply 
affecting.  The  heart  of  the  reader  is  moved, 
and  with  many,  tears  even  flow  readily  as 
they  read.  But  they  are  not  moved  by  their 
feelings  to  action;  It  all  evaporates  in  mere 
feeling.  And  these  persons,  who  will  weep 
profusely  over  the  pages  of  a  novel,  will  look 
with  utter  indifference  upon  the  real  distresses 
of  actual  life,  of  a  .friend  or  a  neighbor.  Now 
it  is  a  fact  in  the  philosophy  of  the  human 
mind,  that  wherever  the  better  feelings  of  our 
nature  are  excited  upon  any  subject,  and  are 
suffered  to  evaporate  in  mere  feeling,  to  pass 
away  without  producing  action,  the  feelings 
themselves  are  either  blunted  and  deadened, 
or  are  cherished  only  for  the  passive  luxury  of 
the  mere  indulgence  of  feeling.  If  a  preach- 
er, for  example,  is  in  the  habit  of  attempting  to 
move  his  hearers  by  terror,  although  he  may 
succeed  for  a  time,  vet  &oon  his  terrific  Ian- 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPOrSMENT.      157 


guage  loses  its  power  over  his  hearers  and 
they  will  listen  to  it  with  perfect  indifference. 
They  undoubtedly  felt,  and  felt  deeply  at  first 
but  they  did  not  act  in  accordance  with  their 
feelings.  Consequent!  v,  they  now  either  do 
not  feel  or  their  feelings  have  lost  all  power 
over  their  conduct.  So  it  is  with  the  readers 
of  novels.  Their  feelings  are  at  first  excited, 
hut  there  is  no  opportunity  for  them  to  act  in 
accordance  with  their  feelings.  Consequent- 
ly, they  either  cease  to  feel  or  their  feelings 
are  entirely  seperated  from  their  conduct  and 
have-  lost  all  control  aver  it.  In  this  way  the 
indiscriminate  and  excessive  reading  of  novels 
blunts  and  deadens  the  finer  sensibilities  of 
our  nature. 

5ih.  My  fifth  objection  to  novel  reading 
and  the  last  which  I  shall  now  notice,  is  that 
they  tend  to  magnify  and  render  too  promi- 
nent the-  passion.  of  love,  and  to  teach  the 
most  absurd  and  dangerous  notions  in  regard 
to  it.  If  ever  you  have  become  acquainted 
with  one  who  is  under  the  influence  of  the  nov- 
el reading  mania,  you  must  have  observed  that 
the  passion  of  love,  its  symptoms,  its  peculiar 
14 


1  59  TOCKG  LADY'I  AJD. 

feelings  and  pleasures,  have  become  il:e  en- 
grossing topic  ofher  conversation,  the  theme 
of  her  daily  thoughts,  and  the  suhject  of  her 
midnight  dreams.  And  then  too,  she  gathers 
foolish  and  absurd  and  dangerous  notions  from 
reading,  in  regard  to  the  nature  and  proper 
influence  of  this  passion.  It  is  connected  in 
her  mind,  not  principally  with  the  truly  esti- 
mable and  lovely  qualities  of  the  mind  and 
the  heart,  but  with  bright  eyes,  and  elegant 
proportions,  and  fair  looks,  and  soft  flattering 
speeches.  It  is  regarded, not,  like  any  of  the 
other  passions  of  our  nature,  as  what  must  be 
watched  and  governed  by  reason  and  religious 
principle,  for  whose  influenceover  us  \ve  must 
give  accouiit.  No,  it  is  regarded  as  omnipo- 
tent, and  uncontrolable.  Tha  idea  of  asking, 
in  regard  to  the  object  of  attachment,  whether 
he  be  worthy  or  not,  whether  our  attachment 
itself  be  proper  or  not,  when  one  has  fallen  in 
Jove,  would  be  regarded,  by  a  novel  reading 
young  lady,  as  the  very  height  of  absurdity. 
In  this  way,  reasonable,  sensible,  religious 
people  sometimes,  under  the  evil  influence  of 
this  evil  practice,  become  thorough  fatalists 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.    153 

in  the  articlo  of  love.  And  that  most  holy 
of  all  earthly  unions,  that  close  and  intimate 
relation,  which  more  nearly  and  more  per- 
manently affects  happiness  and  character  than 
any  other,  is  often  formed  without  the  least 
exfrcise  of  reason,  judgement,  or  principle, 
but  in  blind  subserviency  to.  the  passion  of 
love. 

I  have  thus  enumerated  some  of  the  more 
prominent  objections  against  novel  reading, 
indiscriminate  and  excessive  novel  reading. 
They  are  that  the  representations,  with 
which  the  mind  is  familiarized,  are  too 
highly  colored,  that  they  usually  so  hurry  the 
mind  along  and  so  excite  the  feelings  as  to 
prevent  thought  and  reflection  upon  what  is 
read,  that  they  excite  a  distaste  for  reading  of 
a  more  serious  and  profitable  character,  that 
they  blunt  and  deaden  the  finer  sensibilities  of 
our  natures,  and  that  they  magnify  into  undue 
importance  the  passion  of  love  and  teach  ab- 
surd and  dangerous  notions  of  its  nature  and 
influence  and  proper  place  among  the  princi- 
ples of  our  nature. 

But,  here  you  will  ask,  if  I  intend  to  object 


160  TOUNQ  LADY'S  AID. 

to  the  reading  of  all  fictitious  writings  ?  By 
no  means.  The  expressions  I  have  used, 
have  been  the  indiscriminate  and  excessive 
reading  of  novels.  But  I  would,  if  possible, 
point  out  a  distinction  between  fictitious  wri- 
tings, which  are  profitable  and  those  which 
are  not  so.  And  here  I  go  back  to  the  para- 
bles of  our  Savior  for  the  distinction  which  I 
would  notice.  Our  Savior  spake  in  parables. 
What  were  these  parables  ?  They  were 
scenes  and  stoiies,  pictured  forth  in  the  im- 
agination, for  the  purpose  of  illustrating  moral 
truth.  But  the  purpose  is  kept  distinctly  in 
view.  You  see  that  the  moral  truth,  which 
he  would  illustrate,  is  the  object  upon  which 
his  mind's  eye  is  fixed.  Nay  more,  you  per- 
ceive that  the  object,  for  which  he  is  laboring 
is  to  present  that  moral  truth  more  vividly  to 
the  minds  of  his  hearers.  The  parables, 
therefore,  are  not  true  as  stories,  but  the  in- 
struction conveyed  by  them,  is  truth,  real, 
valuable  truth.  As  illustrations,  they  do  rep- 
resent the  truth  more  clearly  and  vividly,  than 
it  could  otherwise  have  been  done.  Now 
there  may  be,  and  there  are,  fictitious  wri- 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.    161 

tings,  corresponding  in  some  humble  degree, 
with  these  parables.  In  reading  even  these, 
you  may  indeed  be  interested  in  the  mere 
story.  And  you  may  so  read  as  only  to  re- 
member the  story.  But,  if  you  exercise  one 
moment's  thought,  you  must  see  that  the 
minds  of  the  writers  are  fixed  upon  moral 
truth,  and  that  the  great  object  for  which  they 
are  laboring,  is  to  set  that  truth  distinctly  and 
vividly  before  the  minds  of  the  readers. 

For  this  kind  of  fictitious  writing  there  is  a 
strong  call,  a  deep  foundation  in  our  very  na- 
ture. For  instance,  I  wish  to  make  you  see 
and  feel  the  value  of  Christian  faith.  Suppose 
I  tell  you  in  set,  formal,  abstract  terms,  what 
it  is  and  what  are  its  effects.  You  may  be- 
lieve, what  I  say,  but  you  do  not  see  it,  and 
feel  it.  But,  if  I  say  here  is  a  neighbor  who 
is  under  the  influence  of  this  faith,  and  it  has 
made  him  more  upright  in  his  dealings,  more 
kind  in  his  family,  more  devoted  to  all  that 
is  pure  and  good,  that,  in  seasons  of  tempta- 
tion it  nerves  him  to  withstand,  that,  when 
friends  are  taken  in  death  he  is  calm  and  cheer- 
ful ;  suppose,  I  say,  that  I  describe  all  this  in 
14* 


163  YOtrjro  LADY'S  AJD. 

true  colors,  then  you  would  not  only  believe, 
you  would  see,  and  feel  and  desire  to  possess 
it.  Nay  more,  suppose  that  I  state  an  ab- 
stract conclusion  and  state  it  in  general  terms, 
what  process  do  you  go  through  in  order  to 
verify  the  truth  of  my  statement  ?  Do  you 
not  by  the  power  of  imagination,  bring  up  to 
your  mind's  eye  the  individual  cases,  from 
which  the  general  rule  was  drawn,  and  go 
through  all  the  steps  and  follow  the  process  by 
which  the  conclusion  is  verified.  That  is  in 
order  to  make  the  truth  your  own  you  must 
go  through  the  process  which,  he  who  states 
the  truth,  has  gone  through.  He  has  become 
acquainted  with  a  certain  class  of  facts,  and, 
from  these,  he  draws  a  general  conclusion. 
To  verify  that  conclusion,  and  make  it  your 
own,  you  rmist,  by  the  power  of  imagination, 
summon  up  a  similar  class  of  facts  and  trace 
the  steps  by  means  of  which  the  conclusion 
\vas  formed.  There  is  then  a  call  in  nature 
for  the  exercise  of  the  imagination  in  suppo- 
sing cases  for  the  illustration  of  abstract 
truths. 

But  I  consider  this  elass  of   fictitious    wri- 


liVTELLEOTUAL    IJIPROYEMKXT.  103 

tings  as  entirely  and  widely  separated  from 
another  ami  a  much  larger  class.  A  class 
where  the  imagination  of  the  writer  is  suffer- 
ed to  run  wild,  where  the  great  object  is  to 
excite  deep,  thrilling  interest  in  the  plot, 
while  there  is  manifest  no  distinct  and  visible 
moral  truth  as  the  object  to  be  set  forth  and 
illustrated.  While  the  former  class  may  be 
read  with  profit,  if  read  with  care  and  reflec- 
tion, the  latter  unfits  the  mind  for  all  serious 
thought,  all  self  sacrificing  devotion  to  duty. 

And  finally,  I  would  say,  when  you  read 
fictitious  writings,  even  of  the  better  class, 
watch  carefully  their  influence  upon  your  own 
mind.  Ifthey  aw;, ken  a  more  earnest  desire 
for  improvement,  and  you  lenve  them  with  a 
more  earnest  devotion  to  a  right  performance 
of  all  the  duties  of  life,  then  may  you  hope 
they  have  been  useful  and  profitable.  But 
when  they  excite  only  thrilling  emotions, 
which  render  the  detads  of  duty  dry  and  dull, 
then  may  you  doubt  as  to  their  influence,  then 
may  you  pause  and  hesitate  in  your  devotion 
to  them.  Thus  much  upon  novel  reading. 
I  have  spoken  plainly  and  more  at  length  than 


VOUNG  LADY'S  AID 

I  should  have  done,  had  I  not  known  how  fas- 
cinating are  these  woiks,  and  how  prone  young 
ladies  are  to  seek  in  them  only  for  the  passive 
luxury  of  excited  feelings.  I  would  then 
most  earnestly  warn  you,  m.y  young  friends, 
against  these  enticing  but  dangerous  hinderan- 
ces  to  your  intellectual  and  moral  improve- 
ment. 

But,  you  will  remember  the  general  princi- 
ple upon  which  I  am  speaking,  that  your  prof- 
it from  reading  will  depend  not  upon  die 
amount  of  what  you  read  but  upon  the  charac- 
ter of  what  you  read.  Besides  novels,  there 
is  a  vast  amount  of  other  light  reading  against 
which  you  should  ever  he  on  your  guard.  In 
reviews,  and  especially  in  those  periodicals 
designed  expressly  for  ladies,  there  is  much 
of  this  light  reading,  which,  though  pleasant 
for  the  time,  unfit  the  mind  for  serious  studies, 
and  for  grappling  successfully  with  the  duties 
and  trials  of  life.  These  may  be  occasionally 
read  for  recreation.  But  the  great  body  of 
your  reading  should  be  of  a  serious  and  a  sol- 
id character,  works  which  may  excite  thought 
and  awaken  reflection.  1  have  not  here  time 


U.    IMPBOTKMKNT.          165 

to  point  out  the  books  which  may  be  most 
profitably  read,  nor  would  this  be  well.  P'or 
minds  are  differently  constituted,so  that  books, 
which  may  be  more  profitable  to  one  would 
be  less  profitable  to  another. 

But  I  cannot  refrain  from  naming  one  book, 
which,  if  read  aright,  must  be  read  with  pro- 
fit by  all.  I  refer  to  the  sacred  Scriptures. 
Tiiis  book  contains  a  great  variety — history, 
poetry  and  perceptive  instructions.  It  re- 
lates to  high  and  holy  subjects.  It  teaches 
us  concerning  God,  a  holy  and  improving  ob- 
ject of  thought,  concerning  our  Savior,  a  per- 
fect example  of  what  all  should  strive  to  be- 
come. It  lays  open  to  us  our  own  natures, 
teaches  us  what  we  are,  what  we  are  capable 
of  becoming,  and  what  we  are  required  to  be. 
How  vast  the  subjects  of  thought  and  reflec- 
tion laid  open  to  view  in  this  Holy  volume; 
how  extensive  and  various  the  range,  and  how 
well  adapted  to  all  the  changing  circumstances 
of  our  condition.  Are  you  in  prosperity? 
Here  are  subjects  of  thought  adapted  to  this 
state.  Are  you  in  affliction?  Here  are  hopes 
and  promises,  which  are  adapted,  if  made  the 


16G  TOUNO  LADY'S  AID. 

subjects  of  thought  and  reflection,  to  soothe 
the  afflicted  soul.  And  so  of  every  circum- 
stance, condition  and  relation  in  life. 

But  the  rule  I  have  laid  down  in  regard  to 
profitable  reading,  is  peculiarly  applicable  to 
this  most  sacred  of  books,  it  should  be  read 
with  much  thought  and  reflection,  with  much 
self-examination  and  self  application.  You 
read  the  expression,  'God  is  love.'  It  is  but 
a  short  and  simple  sentence.  But  what  un- 
told depths  of  meaning  are  hidden  under  these 
few  words,  God  is  love.  A  condensed  de- 
scription of  his  whole  character  and  his  whole 
government.  You  may  read  it  hastily  and 
not  be  profited.  You  may  make  it  the  theme 
of  thought  and  reflection  for  years,  and  con- 
nect with  it  all  your  observations  of  God's 
dealings  in  the  works  and  laws  of  nature,  and 
in  the  events  of  his  providence,  and  the  more 
}ou  think,  reflect  and  enquire,  the  more  will 
the  meaning  of  this  simple  sentence  be  un- 
fulded  to  your  minds.  And  there  will  be  con- 
tinually rising  up  some  new  view  to  enrich 
your  hearts,  to  enlarge  your  minds,  and  to  fill; 
your  souls  with  all  that  is  great  and  ennobling. 


INTELEdVAI.    IMPKOVEMENT.  167 

Would  you  then  secure  intellectual  improve- 
ment, would  you  render  your  judgment  cor- 
rect and  sober,  would  you  gain  clear  and  cor- 
rect notions  of  man,  of  yourselves,  of  human 
nature  and  human  duties  and  human  destiny? 
Make  the  Bible  the  volume  of  your  daily  pe- 
rusal. I  have  been  surprised  to  find,  as  1 
have  conversed  with  others,  with  those  who 
have  enjoyed  but  few  privileges  for  intellec- 
tual improvement,  and  have  read  but  little, 
I  have  been  surprised  to  find  how  well  devel- 
oped were  their  minds,  how  much  strength- 
ened and  improved  their  mental  powers,  how 
well  regulated  their  imaginations,  how  sober 
their  views,  and  how  natural  and  correct  their 
judgments.  I  have  asked  for  the  reasons. 
I  have  found  them  to  be  readers  of  the  Bible, 
persons,  who  read  slowly  indeed,  but  reflect 
much  upon  what  they  read.  If  then  you  have 
no  fondness  for  the  reading  of  the  Bible,  you 
have  no  reason  to  suspect  the  purity  and  cor- 
rectness of  your  taste,  you  have  reason  to 
fear,  either  that  your  heart,  your  affections  or 
your  moral  feelings  are  not  what  they  should 
be.  And  should  you  find  that  novels  and 


168  YOUNG  LADY'S 

light  readiua  are  taking  off  your  affections 
from  the  Bible,  and  destroying  your  interest 
in  its  perusal,  you  have  reason  to  (ear  from1 
their  influence  upon  your  tastes,  atnl  upon  in- 
tellectual improvement  and  moral  good. — • 
Young  ladies,  to  say  nothing  of  moral  and 
spiritual  improvement,  I  would  say,  would  you 
improve  your  minds  by  reading,  read  the  Bi- 
ble, read  it  daily,  road  it  carefully.  Think, 
reflect  much  upon  what  you  read.  Read  it 
with  prayer.  Read  it  with  much  application 
of  its  principles  and  instructions  to  your  own 
hearts  and  lives.  If  you  will  read  the  Bible, 
and  read  it  in  this  v/ay,  I  am  confident  that 
3'our  intellectual  improvement  will  be  much 
promoted,  that  your  Imagination  will  be  prop- 
erly regulated,  your  menial  powers  much  in- 
vigorated, your  judgment  rendered  sober, 
and  your  views  of  man  and  his  relations,  du- 
ties and  interests  rendered  just,  correct  end 
improving.  Indeed,  could  1  hope  that  in  all 
the  various  suggestions  contained  in  the  series 
of  letters,  I  am  now  addressing  to  you,  this 
single  one  would  be  practically  observed  by 
the  young  ladies  who  may  read  tviiat  I  write, 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPUOVKMENT.  1C9 

1  should  leel  that  I  had  done  much  to  pro- 
mote your  intellectual  improvement,  and  to 
render  that  intellectual  improvement  the  in- 
strument of  moral  and  spiritual  progress.  — - 
Could  I  hope  that  those  young  ladies,  who 
may  read  these  letters,  would,  from  this  time 
forward,  make  the  reading  of  the  Bible  a  daily 
practice,  1  should  have  good  reason  to  hope 
that  I  had  done  much  to  remove  from  female 
society,  frivolity,  vanity,  devotion  to  dress, 
pleasure  and  mere  amusement,  and  to  aid 
them  in  becoming  worthy  of  themselves,  and 
of  their  own  intellectual  and  spiritual  natures, 
worthy  of  God's  approbation.  I  repeat  then 
my  suggestions,  and,  where  I  upon  my  death 
bed,  just  about  to  enter  the  presence  of  try 
God  and  my  Saviour,  and  surrounded  by  a 
family  of  daughters,  or  a  circle  of  sisters,  and 
with  the  thought  upon  my  mind,  that  the  so- 
lemnity of  the  scene  would  give  to  what  I 
might  then  say  a  lasting  influence  upon  the 
characters  and  happiness  of  those  around  me, 
were  I,  undcjr  such  circumstances,  and  whh 
such  thoughts  upon  my  mind,  asked  to  give 
the  single  direction,  which  might  be  more 
15 


170  YOUNG  KADT'S  AID. 

important  than  all  others,  I  would  say,  daugh- 
ters, sisters,  read  the  Bible — read  it  with  much 
care,  with  much  thought  and  reflection,  with 
fervent  prayer — daughters,  sisteis,  read  the 
Bible. 

Is  there  one  among  the  readers  of  these 
pages,  who  will  say,  I  feel  no  interest  in  the 
Bible.  It  is  to  me  a  dull  book,  a  sealed  book. 
When  I  read  it,  it  is  from  a  sense  of  duty  and 
not  from  the  prompting  of  interest?  If  there 
be  such  a  one,  to  her  I  would  offer  a  few  sug- 
gestions, by  way  of  aiding  her  to  acquire  a 
deeper  interest  in  this  best  of  all  books.  It 
may  be,  my  friend,  that  your  want  of  interest 
arises  from  your  having  used  the  scriptures  in 
your  childhood,  as  a  school  book.  It  was 
then  a  task,  assigned  you,  to  read  a  certain 
portion.  You  read  it,  not  for  the  purpose  of 
learning  its  instructions.  You  read  it,  siwipiy 
for  the  purpose  of  pronouncing  aright  and 
with  the  proper  accents,  emphasis  and  pauses 
the  words  of  the  book.  You  blundered  over 
your  lesson,  you  were  corrected  upon  it,  you 
cast  your  book  aside,  in  careless  indifference, 
as  a  class  book  nearly  on  a  rank  with,  and  to 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPUOVEMENT.    171 

be  used  the  same  as  any  other  class  hook. 
In  all  ihis  you  lost  your  reverence  "for  the 
book,  you  acquired  a  disrelish  for  it.  And 
now,  when  you  take  it  up,  something  of  the 
same  feelings  come  over  you.  At  least  your 
indifference  has  become  so  settled  and  con- 
firmed, that  it  is  almost  impossible  to  break  it 
up.  Whether  the  supposition,  which  I  have 
made  be  applicable  to  yourselves  or  not,  I 
cannot  tell.  But  of  this  I  am  fully  satisfied, 
that  the  reading  of  the  scriptures  in  school,  as 
a  class  book,  for  the  simple  purpose  of  learn- 
ing to  read,  has  been  productive  of  incalcu- 
lable evils,  in  the  indifference  to  the  sacred 
contents  of  the  book,  which  is  so  often  in  af- 
ter life  lamented.  Do  you  ask  if  I  would 
have  the  book  banished  from  our  schools? 
By  no  means.  I  would  give  it  a  prominent 
place  in  them.  I  would  not  lay  it  side  by  side 
wiih  other  books.  I  would  elevate  it  above 
them.  I  would  have  it  used  in  our  schools 
as  a  peculiar  book  and  used  for  a  peculiar 
purpose.  At  the  opening  and  the  close  of 
of  the  school,  I  would  have  all  other  books 
laid  aside,  and  \\ie  school  should  be  hushed 


179  TOUNG   LADY'S  AID. 

and  silent.  Then  let  the  Bible  be  taken  out. 
Let  the  teacher  say  a  few  words  upon  the 
character  of  the  book,  as  containing  the  re- 
cords of  a  communication  from  God.  Let  a 
passage  be  read  either  by  the  teacher  or  by 
some  of  the  pupils.  And  then  let  a  few 
words  more  be  added,  explaining,  and  apply- 
ing the  instruction  of  the  passage  read.  And 
let  all  this  be  accompanied  by  acts  of  devo- 
tion, by  a  prayer  on  the  part  of  the  teacher,  or 
by  the  repetition  in  concert  of  the  Lord's 
prayer  by  the  whole  school.  Tn  some  such 
way  as  this,  I  would  have  the  Bible  used  in 
our  schools.  And  then  should  I  hope  that 
the  effect  would  be,  to  excite  rather  than  de- 
stroy interest  in  the  book.  You  will  pardon 
me  for  this  digression,  which  seemed  neces- 
sary to  prevent  a  misunderstanding  of  my 
previous  remarks. 

It  may  be,  I  have  said,  that  your  want  of 
interest  in  the  Bible,  is  the  result  of  your  hav- 
ing used  it  as  a  class  book  in  school  :  or  it 
may  be,  that  your  want  of  interest  arises  from 
other  circumstances.  The  Bible  is  often  read 
as  a  single  book,  composed  at  one  time,  and 


INTJBLLKCTUAL    IJdPROr JEMEM1.  173 

all  for  one  purpose.  And  being  read  in  this 
way,  it  is  often  read  without  interest.  The 
circumstances  under  which  each  portion  was 
written,  and  the  object  for  which  they  were 
severally  prepared,  are  often  unknown  to  the 
reader.  And  then  the  division  into  chapters 
and  ver.-es,  although  convenient  for  reference, 
does  much  to  break  up  and  render  obscure 
the  sense  and  general  tenor  of  the  whole.  It 
may  be,  that  your  want  of  interest,  like  that  of 
many  others,  may  have  arisen  from  some  one 
or  from  all  of  these  causes. 

But,  from  whatever  causes  it  may  have 
arisen,  the  great  question  is,  how  shall  this  in- 
difference be  broken  up  ?  And  on  this  ques- 
tion I  would  remark,  first,  that  it  is  a  general 
law  of  the  human  mind  that  interest  will  be 
excited  in  almost  any  subject  to  which  we  pay 
strict  and  devoted  and  continued  attention. 
Have  you  no  interest,  for  example,  in  paint- 
ings ?  Go  visit  daily  a  gallery,  where  are  ex- 
hibited the  works  of  the  best  masters,  attend 
carefully  to  the  paintings  before  you,  exam- 
ine all  their  peculiarities,  study  out  all  their 
beauties,  compare  them  with  one  another. — 
15* 


174  TOUNO    I,ADY*g    AID, 

As  you  do  this,  you  will  find  an  interest  in 
these  paintings  gradually  growing  upon  you  ? 
Have  you  no  interest  in  sacred  music.  Go 
vjsit  those  places  where  you  may  listen  to  the 
purest  and  best  exhibitions  of  skill  and  taste  in 
the  department.  Attend  carefully  to  what 
you  hear,  watch  the  peculiarities  of  each  part, 
voice,  or  piece,  and  compare  one  with  anoth- 
er. In  this  way,  although  you  may  never  be* 
come  a  skilful  critic  in  the  technicals  of  sa- 
cred music,  yet  you  will  find  a  glowing  inter- 
est in  these  performances  creeping  over  you. 
You  will  soon  take  pleasure  in  them.  You 
perceive  that,  by  devoted  and  continued  at- 
tention to  a  subject,  you  may  acquire  an  inter- 
est in  that  subject.  This  same  law  of  human 
nature  will  apply  to  the  sacred  scriptures, 
By  devoted  and  continued  attention  to  them, 
you  may  acquire  an  interest  in  them. 

But  how,  you  ask,  shall  you  proceed  in 
your  attention  to  them  ?  I  would  not  advise 
you  to  undertake  to  read  the  Bible  through  in 
course  as  a  matter  of  duty,  But  I  would  say 
take  each  book  by  itself,  as  a  separate  vol- 
ume, just  as  though  it  were  not  bound  in  the 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.    175 

• 

came  volume  with  die  other  books.  Read 
each  separate  book  through,  just  as  you  would 
any  similar  volume.  In  doing  this,  it  will  be 
of  some  assistance,  if  you  can  avail  yourself 
of  some  short  introduction  to  the  several 
books,  such  as  the  Bible  Companion,  a  work 
puplished  a  year  or  two  since  in  Philadelphia. 
Here  you  will  learn  something  of  the  circum- 
stances under  which  the  several  books  were 
written,  together  with  the  objects  for  which 
they  were  written.  Here  too  you  will  find 
some  little  analysis  of  the  contents  of  each 
book,  which  may  aid  you  in  mapping  out 
these  contents,  if  1  may  so  speak,  in  your  own 
mind,  so  as  to  be  able  to  remember  the  places 
of  important  and  interesting  topics.  And  this 
I  think  very  important.  You  should  try  to 
have,  in  your  mind,  some  clear  views  of  the 
different  places  in  the  sacred  books,  where 
these  important  topics  may  be  found.  In  this 
way,  by  reading  the  Bible  in  order  to  under- 
stand, you  will  be  prepared  for  the  more  prof- 
itable, devotional  and  practical  reading  of  the 
book.  Do  you  wish  to  refresh  your  mind  at 
uny  time,  upon  some  point  of  duty,  you  will 


176  TODNO    LADT'S    AID. 

know  where  to  turn  for  the  instruction  which 
you  desire.  Do  you  wish  to  find  language  to 
express  your  penitence,  your  humility,  or  your 
thanksgivingv  you  will  know  where  to  turn  for 
such  language.  Are  you  on  a  bed  of  sick- 
ness, you  can,  with  this  knowledge  of  the 
scriptures,  direct  your  friend  to  such  passages 
as  may  best  comport  with  your  feelings,  and 
best  adapted  to  your  wants. 

Then  too,  I  would  advise  the  reading  of  the 
Bible  in  this  way,  by  selections  of  passages 
appropriate  to  your  peculiar  wants  and  feel- 
ings. I  need  not  dwell,  I  trust,  upon  the  im- 
portance of  making  yourself  acquainted,  as 
far  as  you  may  be  able,  with  the  manners  and 
customs,  with  the  peculiarities  of  thought  and 
speech,  and  with  the  natural  history  of  the 
times  and  regions  spoken  of  or  alluded  to  in 
the  Bible,  The  importance  of  this  you  will 
at  once  perceive.  Nor  need  I  urge  you  to 
compare  scripture  with  scripture.  The  very 
process  which  1  have  recommended,  of  map- 
ping out  the  .scripture  in  your  own  minds,  will 
be  the  most  effectual  method  of  doing  this.  I 
would  simply  repeat,  then,  what  I  have  al« 


IWTKI.LECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.  1?7 

ready  said.  Read  the  Bible,  daily,  carefully, 
with  much  thought,  with  ferven:  prayer,  and 
you  will,  I  trust,  soon  find  yourself  becoming 
deeply  interested  in  its  contents. 

But  here,  it  may  be,  that  another  and  a  dif- 
ferent objection  will  arise.  Some  young  lady, 
as  she  reads  what  I  have  just  now  written, 
may  say,  I  arn  wholly  indifferent  to  serious 
things.  Why  then  should  I  read  the  Bible  ? 
Does  not  thedilligent  reading  of  the  Bible  im- 
ply an  interest  in  serious  things,  and  ought  I 
not,  therefore  to  wait  until  I  feel  this  inter- 
est ?  To  such  a  one,  I  would  say,  the  read- 
ing of  the  Bible,  in  the  way  in  which  I  have 
suggested,  is  the  very  way  to  become  interes- 
ted i.i  serious  things.  It  is  a  knowledge  of 
the  truth  which  excites  emotions  and  feeling. 
Were  it  my  desire  to  interest  you  in  the  causa 
of  the  slave,  I  must  set  before  you  the  truth 
upon  the  subject,  before  I  could  reasonably 
expect  that  you  would  become  interested. 
Do  I  wish  to  awaken  in  you  an  interest  in  the 
subject  of  temperance  ?  I  must  set  before 
you  the  truth  upon  the  subject.  And  the 
truth,  when  onca  clearly  perceived  will  excita 


178  YOUNG    LADl'i    AID, 

emotion.  So,  if  you  will  devotedly,  perse- 
veringly  read  the  Bible,  you  will  then  be  mncle 
acquainted  with  those  truths, in  regard  to  God 
and  the  Saviour,  in  regard  to  the  evils  of  sia 
and  the  way*  of  salvation,  in  regard  to  the  du- 
ties and  the  destiny  of  man,  which,  when  ful- 
ly perceived,  can  hardly  fail  of  exciting  emo- 
tion and  interest,  of  leading  you  to  seek  and 
pray  for  the  quickening  and  renewing  influen- 
ces of  God's  spirit.  Would  you  then  become 
religious  ?  Read  the  Bible. 

1  have  spoken  of  reading  as  a  means  of  in- 
tellectual improvement  and  have  offered  such 
suggestions  as  seemed  to  me  important  upon 
the  subject.  As  another  means  of  intellectu- 
al improvement  I  would  mention  the  impoc' 
tance  of  a  habit  of  observation.  The  means 
pf  exciting  thought  and  reflection;  resources  for 
intellectual  nourishment  are  not  confined  to 
books. — Nor  is  intellectual  progress  confined 
to  the  study  of  books.  The  whole  world, 
both  of  nature  and  of  man,  is  full  of  instruct- 
ion, and,  if  studied,  it  will  not  only  fill  the 
mind  with  knowledge,  but  will  afford  that  in- 
tellectual exercise,  which  will  promote  intellec- 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     1 

tual  development. — If  then  you  have  formed 
the  habit  of  observation,  you  will  never  be  at 
a  loss  for  employment  for  your  thoughts. 
Every  person  you  meet,  will,  in  the  peculiar* 
ities  of  character  presented,  afford  food  for 
thought — every  event  of  providence,  and  ev^ 
ery  object  of  nature,  will  thus  be  the  means  of 
intellectual  development.  But  what  is  the 
habit  of  observation  ?  tt  is  not  merely  the 
habit  of  looking  at  things*  B  ut  ihe  habit  of 
thinking  and  reflecting  upon  what  you  see. 
The  man  of  observation  is  not  the  man 
who  has  actually  seen  the  greatest  number 
and  greatest  variety  of  objects  ;  he  is  the  man 
who  has  reflected  the  most  carefully  upon 
what  he  has  seen,  and,  in  this  way,  derived 
the  most  valuable  instruction  from  them. 
What  I  would  have  you  seek,  is  the  habit  of 
inquiry  and  thought  and  reflection,  in  regard 
to  every  object  which  may  be  presented  to 
your  notice,  seeking  the  peculiarities,  inquir- 
ing for  the  causes,  learning  the  effects  and 
tracing  the  relations  and  connections  of  one 
circumstance,  event  or  object  with  another 
In  this  way,  you  will  be  constantly  making 
improvement — your  intellectual  powers  will 


VOINO   LADY'S  AID.  180 

be  constantly  acquiring  new  strength  and 
greater  freedom  and  more  full  developement. 
Form,  then,  the  habit  of  close,  accurate  obser- 
vation, and  you  will  be  possessed  of  a  power- 
ful instrument  for  intellectual  improvement. 

Nay  more,  this  habit  will  have  a  further 
and  more  extensive  influence.  If  you  can 
em |  loy  your  minds  in  thinking  about  the  ob- 
jects you  have  seen,  you  can  also,  under  the 
influence  of  the  same  habit,  employ  them  in 
thinking  about  the  lectures  arid  discourses 
which  you  have  heard.  And  who  is  it  that 
derives  the  greatest  profit  from  what  she 
hears?  Not  she  who  hears  the  most,  not  she 
who  hears  with  the  deepest  interest  at  the 
time.  But  she  who  thinks  most  carefully 
upon  what  she  has  heard,  after  she  has  done 
hearing.  And  here  is  the  point  where  many 
fail,  and  the  reason  that  they  do  not  derive  so 
much  improvement  as  they  otherwise  mi^ht 
from  the  lectures  and  discourses  which  they 
hear.  They  hear  with  interest  and  with 
pleasure,  but,  when  they  have  done  hearing, 
they  turn  their  thoughts  to  other  things. — 
What  they  have  heard  is  soon  gone  from  their 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPRQTEMEX'T.  181 

minds,  and  no  distinct  and  lasting  impression 
is  left.  But,  if  they  would  think  over  what 
they  have  heard,  or  talk  it  over  with  their 
companions,  or  write  out  an  abstract,  they 
would  make  it  mere  entirely  their  own,  they 
would  gain  much  valuable  knowledge,  which 
they  now  let  slip,  and  they  would  acquire  by 
the  rnearts,  great  intellectual  strength  and  de- 
velopment. 

There  are  two  other  topics,  which  ought  to 
be  noticed  in  this  connection,  as  relating  to 
subjects  which  have  a  bearing  upon  intellectual 
and  moral  improvement,  the  topics  of  dress 
and  amusements  or  recreations.  Upon  these 
topics  1  will  offer 'a  few  words.  You  will  not 
expect  me  to  be  minute  in  my  remarks  upon 
dress.  I  cannot  lay  down  rules,  but  I  will 
endeavor  to  point  out  such  suggestions,  as 
have  been  the  result  of  much  observation. 
And,  first,  it  is  a  general  law  of  the  human 
mind,  that  the  employment  of  the  mental 
powers  upon  trifling  and  unimportant  objects, 
tends  to  weaken  the  mind  itself.  And  the 
same  result  is,  to  a  certain  degree,  witnessed 
whrn  thr««  trying  objects  are  exalted  to  »fe. 
16 


183  TOVN«    LA  m'i     AID. 

rank  in  our  estimation,  altogether  beyond  their 
intrinsic  worth,  or  their  comparative   deserts. 
The  operation  of  this  law  of  the  mind,  is  of- 
ten distinctly  exhibited  in  the  influence   upon 
intellectual  character, exerted  by  too  great    a 
devotion  to  dress.     I  have  seen  those,  whose 
whole  souls  seemed  to  be    absorbed   in    their 
devotion  to   dress.     They   judged  nf  others 
by    the    dress.      They    were    distressingly 
and  foolishly  anxious  in  regard  to    their  own 
dress.     Hours  would  be  spent,  thoughts    and 
anxieties  would  be  wasted,  upon   this   subject 
to  the  neglect  of  other    and    more    important 
subjects  of  attention.     And    then,    any   little 
deficiency  would  be  the  source  of  more   un- 
liappiness   than   a    much  greater    intellectual 
and  moral  deficiency.     The  result  of  all  this 
has  been, that  the  capacities  of  the  mind  seem- 
ed to  have  lost  their  vigor,  their  power  for  the 
comprehensive  grasp  of  an  important  subject. 
Mental  imbecility  has  been  the    consequence. 
The   correctness  of  this  view   you    will   at 
once  perceive,  if  you  take  an  extreme   case. 
Suppose  a  young  lady,  even  of  a   bright    and 
powerful  rnind,  to  be  employed    to   years  of 
maturity,  in  all  the  nicities  of  baby  house  up- 
holstery, and  doll  dressing  finery.     She  may 
excel   in   these  trifling   employments.     But 


INTELLECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT.          183 

would  she  not  lose  all  the  vigor  and  energy  of 
her  mind?  Would  not  her  mental  powers 
be  rendered  dwarfish,  and  their  growth  and 
development  be  entirely  prevented?  Such 
would  be  the  inevitable  result.  And  the  same 
result,  exhibited  in  a  less  striking  degree, 
may  be  expected  by  every  young  lady,  who 
devotes  undue  attention  to  the  subject  of  dress. 
1  would  not  inculcate  carelessness  nor  indiff- 
erence in  regard  to  dress.  For  this  would 
be  injurious  in  a  mental  and  moral  point  of 
view.  We  are  so  constituted,  that  we  can- 
not be  careless  and  indifferent  in  regard  to 
what  we  may  esteem  comparatively  trifling, 
without  the  danger  of  becoming  careless  in 
regard  to  more  important  matters.  She  who 
is  careless  in  regard  to  dress,  therefore,  will 
be  in  great  danger  of  becoming  careless  in  re- 
gard to  her  mental  and  moral  habits.  So,  too, 
she  who  exercises  no  taste  in  regard  to  dress, 
will  soon  neglect  to  exercise  taste  in  regard 
to  other  matters. 

Dress,  then,  should  receive  that  attention 
which  its  intrinsic  merits  and  its  comparative 
importance  demands.  The  care  should  be, not 


rouxa  LADYS  AID. 

to  exalt  it  to  an  undue  prominence,  not  to  be- 
stow upon  it  exclusive  or  undue  attention. 
There  should  be  perfect  neatness,  there 
should  be  the  exercise  of  nice  taste,  and  a 
careful'study  of  what  is  becoming.  But  there 
should  be  no  mere  love  of  finery  and  display, 
there  should  be  no  great  attention  bestowed 
upon  the  subject  as  of  importance  in  itself. 
What  I  would  impress  upon  your  minds  is, 
that  dress  should  be  regarded  as  subsidiary 
to  mental  and  moral  improvement.  And  I 
would  have  you  ever  bear  it  in  mind,  that 
in  the  degree  and  manner  of  your  attention 
to  this  subject,  you  are  forming  mental  and 
moral  habits,  which  will  exert  a  powerful  in- 
fluence upon-.character.  If  this  thought  is  on- 
ly borne  in  mind, there  will  be  no  need  of  par- 
ticular rules  and  direct'ions  upon  the  subject. 
Your  own  good  sense,  and  delicate  taste,  and 
nice  discernment  of  propriety  will  be  your 
best  guide.  Thus  much  have  I  felt  bound  to 
say  upon  the  subject  of  dress,  in  its  influence 
upon  intellectual  habits  and  moral  character. 
In  regard  to  amusements  and  recreations, 
iihave  sometimes  thought  that  we  overlooked 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     185 

or  forgot  the  refreshment  which  may  be  de- 
rived from  a  mere  change  of  pursuits.  Con- 
sequently, we  often  fatigue  and  unfit  ourselvei 
for  mental  efforts,  and  destroy,  for  the  time, 
our  moral  energies,  by  the  exciting  nature  of 
our  amusements.  A  young  lady  is  often  so 
engrossed  in  the  anticipations  of  a  ball  or  as- 
sembly, so  absorbed  in  thought  r.nd  feeling 
while  prepared  for  it,  and  so  highly  excited 
amidst  its  scenes,  that  she  is  unfitted  for  any 
vigorous  and  profitable  intellectual  efforts  for 
days  after.  And,  then  too,  in  the  fatigue 
which  follows,  her  moral  energies  are  prostra- 
ted. Had  this  young  lady  simply  danced  at 
home,  with  her  brothers  and  sisters,  or  with 
friends  and  neighbors  who  might  be  present, 
without  any  previous  feverish  anticipations, 
or  any  fatiguing  preparations,  it  would  have 
been  a  healthful  and  refreshing  amusement. 
So  if  a  young  lady  is  fatigued  with  long  con- 
tinued study,  or  feels  that  she  is  in  danger  of 
neglecting  to  take  sufficient  exercise  for  her 
health,  let  her  leave  for  a  while  her  studies, 
and  bestir  herself  in  useful  household  labors, 
and  she  will  find  herself  much  refreshed.  I 


YOUNG  LADYS  AID. 

am  aware  that  some  young  ladies  endeaver  to* 
secure  the  exercise  necessary  for  health,  while 
at  school,  by  walking..  Walking  is  indeed  good 
exercise.  And  then  it  is  in  the  open  air,  which 
is  another  advantage.  But  the  danger  is, 
that,  while  taking  exercise  in  this  way,  she 
will  take  it  simply  as  exercise,  without  having 
her  mind  diverted  from  herself  by  her  interest 
in  some  other  object,  which  will  diminish  its 
good  influence,  or  else  she  will  contract  a  habit 
of  gadding,  and  acquire  an  uneasiness  amid 
the  ordinary  round  of  duties  and  pleasures  at 
home,  and  will  imperceptibly  fall  under  the  in- 
fluence of  a  love  of  outward  excitement. 
Young  people  are  not  aware  how  soon  tastes 
are  acquired  and  habits  formed  in  this  respect, 
nor  of  the  power  which  such  tastes  and  habits 
exert  over  the  character..  Let  a  young  lady 
walk  out  regularly  every  afternoon,  for  the 
sake  of  exercise  and  although  she  may  be 
strictly  conscientious,  may  takr,  her  walks  simp- 
ly for  the  purpose  of  promoting  her  health, yet 
it  will  be  but  a  very  short  time,  before  she  will 
feel  uneasy  to  remain  at  home  of  an  afternoon. 
I^et  your  walks  for  exercise  then,  b«  occasion- 


INTELf.ECTUAL    IMPROVEMENT  187 

al  only,  and  not  regular,  and  seek  for  health 
in  the  regular  discharge  of  your  appropriate 
duties.  The  very  change  from  study  to  house- 
hold duties,  will  be  refreshing.  On  this  sub- 
ject, as  in  regard  to  dress,  what- 1  wish  is  to. 
impress  upon  your  minds  the  thought  that,  the- 
degree  of  attention  which  you  may  devote  to« 
them  and  the  manner  in  which  you  may  at- 
tend to  them,  are  exerting  a  powerful  influ- 
ence in  the  formation  of  mental  and  moral 
habits.  If  you  will  bear  this  thought  in  mind 
and  ever  inquire  carefully  for  the  influence 
which  your  amusements  and  recreations  are 
exerting  upon-you,  your  own  judgment  will 
be  your  best  guide  in  regard  to  them.  If  you. 
find  that  they  are  engrossing  your  affections,, 
are  unfitting  you  for  sober  thought,  serious 
reading,  or  vigorous  effort  in  the  discharge 
of  incumbent  duties,  you  have  great  reason 
to  fear  the  result.  In  regard  to  recreation 
and  refreshment  then,  I  would;  say,  seek  it 
often  in  a  mere  change  from  one-  useful  em- 
ployment to  another  of  the  same  character.. 
And  when  you  engage  in  scenes  of  mere 
amusement,  avoid  those  which  ar«  exciting 


188  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

and  fatiguing,  and  seek  those  which  are   purer 
simple  and  consequently  healthful. 

One  word  more  and  I  will  close.     I    have 
in  this,  and  in  the  proceeding  letter,  as  indeed1 
I  have  all  along,  addressed  you  as  beings  pos- 
sessed of  minds  of  a  high  order,  minds  capa- 
ble of  improvement,  in  all   that    is  great  and 
good,  minds  which  entitle   you-  to-  deep    and 
heartfelt  respect,  and  which*  are   worthy   of 
your  own  most  assiduous  care  in  their  cultiva- 
tion.    I  wish  you  to   feel  that  you  are  not 
mere  toys  to  be  played    with,   decked   out, 
flattered  and  amused,  but  that  you  are   capa- 
ble of  great  intellectual  and  moral    power.    I 
wish,  if  possible,  to  inspire  you  with   a    deep 
feeling  of  self-respect,    a   self-respect,    which' 
as  it  is  based  upon  die  capacities  God  has  be* 
stowed  upon  you,  will  make  you  humble   in 
view  of  your  attainments,  and  will  deter  yoir 
from  any  course   of  conduct  derogatory   to 
your  high    capacities,    from   yielding-  to  that 
vanity  and  frivolity   which    may  retard    your 
highest  mental  and  moral  development.    Nay 
more,  I  wish,  if  possible,  to  awaken   in   you 
the  feeling  that  all  your  capacities  are  treas- 


INTELLECTUAL  IMPROVEMENT.     1£9 

tires  committed  to  you  upon  trust,  for  the 
right  improvement  and  cultivation  of  which 
you  are  accountable  to  God.  I  wish  to  do 
this  in  the  hope  that,  if  these  feelings  are 
once  awakenqd- within  you,  they  w-iil  prompt 
you  to  efforts  in  your  own  intellectual,  moral 
and  religious  self-cultivation,  proportioned  to 
your  respective  capacities,  and  in  accordance 
with  your  respective  peculiarities  of  circum- 
stance and  condition.. 


LETTER    VK 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE. 

The  fact  stated  that  every  one  exerts  some  influence 
— that  we  are  accountable  for  the  character  of  the 
influence  which  we  exert — Female  influence  to  be 
exerted  indirectly,  by  the  cheerful  and  appropriate 
discharge  of  private  and  domestic  duties — The  rea- 
sons of  this  opinion — what  it  is  right  for  one  to  do 
it  is  right  for  all  similarly  situated  to  do — The  ques- 
tion not  whether  they  have  a  rign.1  but  whether  it  is 
right  for  them — if  females  choose  te  leave  the  quiet 
scenes  of  private  life  and  enter  the  arena  of  con- 
tention and  public  effort,  they  must  be  willing  to 
abide  by  the  natural  cons«quences  of  their  conduct 
In  all  civilized  society  two  classes  of  duties,  the  du- 
ties of  the  house  and  the  cares  and  labors  of  business 
females  cannot  conduct  the  latter — pziblic  efforts  con- 
nected more  directiy  with  the  latter,  therefore  these 
are  inappropriate  to  woman — Jesus  Christ  called  no 
temales  to  I>3  of  the  number  of  his  appostles — Paul's 
opinion  of  the  sphere  of  female  efforts.  Suggestions 
as  to  the  proper  mode  of  influence— The  Christian 
daughter  and  sister  to  let  religion  appear  in  its  good 
influences  upon  her  own  character  if  she  would  in- 
flueace  fatlxer  or  brothers — Females  cart  promote 


FEMALE    INFLfKNCE  191 

moral  reform — by  elevating  their  own  characters — 
by  shewing  a  marked  regard  for  worth  of  character- 
by  giving  countenance  to  amusements  which  are 
pure  and  healthful — advised  to  have  nothing  to  do 
with  moral  reform  societies — Suggestions  upon  the 
subject  of  temperance  movements — upon  the  subject 
of  slavery,  abolition  petitions — Females  may  do  good 
by  visiting  the  sick — the  poor — educating  the  young 
— engaging  in  Sunday  school  instruction,  Conclusion. 

MY  YOUNG  FRIENDS: 

In  urging  upon  you  the  claims  of  Christi- 
anity, I  stated  that  she  asked  two  things  of 
each  one  of  you;  first,  that  you  would,  each  of 
you,  strive  to  form  your  characters  in  accor- 
dance with  her  instructions  and  her  spirit,  and, 
second,  that  you  would  endeavor  to  exert  an 
influence  in  promoting  the  spread  of  truth  and 
piety,  the  reign  of  peace  and  holiness  around 
you.  I  have  already  dwelt,  as  you  know,  upon 
several  particulars  in  regard  to  your  individual 
moral  and  intellectual  improvement.  I  am  now 
to  urge  upon  you  the  claim  of  Christianity  to 
your  influence. 

This  claim  is  in  perfect  accordance  with  your 
natures  and  your  relations.  It  is  said  in  scrip- 
lure  that  'none  of  us  livelh  to  himself.'  An<l 


192  TOUNC  LADY'S  AIB. 

these  words  express  a  most  solemn  and  impor- 
tant truth.  We  are  created  with  social  affec- 
tions. We  are  bound  together  in  society  by 
the  strong  bonds  of  mutual  dependence,  recip- 
rocal interests  and  personal  attachments.  And 
these  bonds  bring  us, 'to  a  greater  or  less  de- 
gree, under  each  other's  influence.  There  is 
no  man,  woman  or  child  living,  that  is  not,  to  a 
greater  or  less  degree,  under  the  influence  of 
some  other  human  being.  So  too,  there  is  no 
man,  woman  or  child  living,  who  does  not  ex- 
ert some  influence,  for  good  or  for  evil,  over 
some  other  human  being.  This  I  am  aware  is 
a  strong, 'it  may  seem  to  you,  a  startling  posi- 
tion. And  yet  I  am  satisfied,  that  it  is  as  true 
as  it  is  strong  or  startling.  I  repeat  the  asser- 
tion, for  I  wish  it  to  be  impressed  upon  your 
hearts  and  indelibly  fixed  in  your  memories. 
There  is  no  man,  woman  or  child,  who  does 
not  exert^some  influence,  for  good  or  for  evil, 
over  some  other  human  being.  Do  you  doubt 
the  truth  of  the  assertion?  Do  you  ask  how  it 
is  possible  for  a  child,  a  mere  infant,  to  exert 
influence?  Come  with  me.  See  that  father, 
«!>pt,  mnthpr,  as  they  look,  with  sweet  cornpla- 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE  193 

cency,  upon  their  smiling  babe.  Have  not 
new  feelings  been  excited  in  their  hearts,  at 
the:  birth  of  that  child?  Have  not  new  resolu- 
tions been  formed,  and  slumbering  energies 
been  aroused?  If  they  are  persons  of  the  least 
reflection,  must  they  not  feel  that  a  solemn  re- 
sponsibility now  rests  upon  them,  that  new 
dignity  is  added  to  their  characters,  and  new 
importance  is  attached  to  all  their  conduct,  in 
the  circumstance  that  to  them  is  committed 
the  training  of  an  intellectual  and  moral,  a  spir- 
itual and  an  immortal  being?  The  very  pres- 
ence, then,  the  very  thought  of  that  child,  al- 
though the  child  itself  is  not  accountable,  will 
not  be  without  its  influence  upon  parental 
hearts  and  parental  characters.  And  the  char- 
acter of  this  influence^  too,  will  vary  with  the 
differing  characteristics  of  the  child.  If  the 
child  be  weak  and  puny,  or  even  idiotic,  what 
an  influence  of  a  peculiar  character  will  be  felt. 
Parents,  under  the  trial,  will  bcome  either  more 
patient  or  more  pevish. 

Every  child  th«n,  that  lives,  exerts  an  influ- 
ence. And  is  not  this  tenfold  more  the  cas«,  in 
regard  to  those  who  have  advanced  beyond  the 
17 


194  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID 

years  of  childhood?  Have  you  not,  in  some  in- 
stances, seen  the  characters  of  young  ladies  en- 
tirely changed,  either  for  the  better  or  for  the 
worse,  through  the  influence  exei  ted  over  them 
by  the  characters  of  their  associates?  Have 
you  not  seen  the  characters  of  your  acquaintan- 
ces gradually  growing  better  or  becoming 
•worse,  in  consequence  of  the  character  and  in- 
fluence of  those  with  whom  matrimonial  con- 
nections have  been  formed?  I  wish,  my  young 
friends,  you  would  dwell  upon  this  fact  in  your 
condition.  Wherever  you  are,  in  whatever 
circumstances  you  may  be  placed,  you  are  ex- 
erting an  influence,  either  for  good  or  for  evil. 
You  have  each  one  of  you,  a  sphere  around 
you,  it  may  be  of  greater  or  of  less  extent,  in 
which  your  influence  is  all  powerful.  It  is  more 
powerful  than  you  imagine.  I  know  not  but 
I  might  say  more  powerful  than  you  can  con- 
ceive. It  operates  indeed  silently,  impercep- 
tibly it  may  be,  but  not  the  less  powerfully  on 
that  account.  Suppose  you  profess  to  be  in- 
terested in  the  subject  of  religion.  This  very 
fact  will  exert  a  powerful  influence  upon  the 
circle  of  your  friends  and  acquaintances.  If 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  195 

they  see  you  becoming  really  engaged,  in  the 
cultivation  of  your  own  spiritual  nature*,  less 
selfish,  more  kind  and  amiable  and  charitable, 
more  conscientious  and  devout,  they  \vijl  be  fill- 
ed with  respect  for  the  religion,  in  which  you 
profess  to  be  interested.  But,  should  they  see 
you  becoming  bitter  in  your  sectarian  feeling?, 
filled  with  spiritual  pride,  no  more  willing  to 
give  up  your  own  pleasures  for  the  happiness 
of  others,  they  will  begin  to  say,  within  them- 
selves, if  such  be  the  influence  of  religion, 
we  desire  not  to  be  its  subjects.  Thus  you 
perceive,  that,  while  you  have  been  entirely 
unconscious  of  the  fact,  an  influence  and  a 
powerful  influence  has  gone  forth  from  your 
conduct  for  £ood  or  for  evil.  Remember  then 

O 

that  it  is  not  for  you  to  say  wether  you  wilf 
exert  an  influence  or  not.  For  it  is  one  of  the 
inherent  laws  of  your  nature  that  yon  must  ex- 
ert influence  of  some  kind  and  to  some  degree 
upon  those  around  you.  The  only  question 
which  is  within  your  control,  relslcs  to  the 
character  of  that  influence.  And  it  is  this 
thought  which  renders  the  subject  so  impor- 
tant, the  thought  that  you  are,  each  o.f  you> 


196  YOUXC  LADY'S   AID. 

accountable  before  God  for  the  character  of 
the  influence  which  you  may  exert.  Every 
one  who  has  reached  such  a  decree  of  discre- 
tion as  to  know  good  from  evil,  right  from 
wrong,  is  an  accountable  being — accountable 
for  the  character  of  the  influence  which  he 
or  she  may  exert.  That  influence  is  the  nat- 
ural consequence  of  the  conduct  pursued. — 
And  conduct,  so  far  as  its  moral  character  is 
concerned,  is  the  result  of  voluntary  choice. 
If  you  choose  to  conduct  under  the  circum- 
stances in  which  you  are  placed,  in  one  way 
rather  than  in  another,  you  are  accountable 
for  all  the  influences  which  may  flow  from  the 
course  which  you  pursue.  You  cannot  es- 
cape this  accountability  if  you  attempt  to  stand 
neutral.  There  is  no  such  thing  as  moral  or 
social  neutrality.  But  I  trust  that  I  have  said 
enough  to  establish  my  position. 

Christianity  then  comes  to  you  just  as  you 
are,  and  puts  in  claims,  which  are  in  perfect 
accordance  with  your  natures.  She  sees  that 
from  the  very  constitution  of  human  nature — 
from  the  very  relations  in  which  you  are  pla- 
ced, you  must  exert  some  influence,  that,  for 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  197 

the  character  of  that  influence,  you  are  ac- 
countahle  before  God,  and  she  asks  that  you 
will  strive  to  exert  that  influence  in  her  be- 
half. She  asks  that,  since  you  must  exert  an 
influence,  either  for  or  against  her  you  will  en- 
deavor to  put  forth  that  influence  under  her 
guidance  and  for  the  more  rapid  and  widely 
extended  spread  of  her  spirit  and  principles. 
Will  you,  my  young  friends, comply  with  this, 
the  second  claim  of  Christianity?  I  trust  that  you 
will.  For  there  are  the  most  powerful  motives 
to  urge  you  to  this.  When  you  consider  that 
this  is  the  course  which  God  requires  of  you, 
when  you  think  of  what  your  Saviour  has  done 
for  you  and  that  this  is  what  he  asks  in  re- 
turn, when  you  feel  that  the  course  required, 
is  none  other  than  the  course  demanded  by  a 
regard  to  your  own  present  and  future  happi- 
ness, you  will,  I  trust,  comply  with  the  requi- 
sitions of  Christianity,  and  come  up  resolute- 
ly and  boldly  to  the  work  of  the  Lord. 

But  now  comes  the  question  as  to  the  man- 
ger in  which  you  are  to  comply,  the  proper 
mode  of  putting  forth  your  exertions,  the  ap- 
propriate sphere  of  female  influence.  An 


193  YOUNG  LADY'S   AID. 

here  I  would  remnrk  that  it  is  common,  at  the, 
present  day,  to  flatter  females,  with  glowing 
descriptions  of  the  vast  amount,  and  the  strik- 
ing character  of  the  influence  and  which  they 
are  capable  of  exerting,  and  which  they  are 
therefore  called  upon  to  exert.  The  heads 
of  some  females  are  turned  by  this  flattery — 
Having  heard  much  of  the  vast  amount  of  fe- 
male influence,  and  not  beholding  the  striking 
and  visible  results  of  their  own  efforts  in  the 
ordinary  sphere  of  their  duties,  they  believe 
themselves  called  upon  to  step  aside  from  this 
sphere  and  to  engage  in  more  open  and  direct 
efforts.  Consequently  we  now  see,  what  has 
seldom  been  seen  before,  ladies  leaving  the 
quiet  of  domestic  scenes,  and  wandering 
forth  as  public  speakers,  debaters  and  lectur- 
ers— the  public  agitators  of  the  community. 
Nay  more,  we  see  them  moving  forward  in 
bodies,  by  mean.?  of  their  petitions,  to  interfere 
with  the  appropriate  duties  of  legislation,  to 
dictate  upon  subjects  deeply  affecting  the  re- 
lations of  these  states  with  each  other  and 
with  neighboring  communities.  These  things 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE. 

I  say  we  see.     For,  strange  as  it  may  seem, 
I  allude  to  well  known  facts. 

And,  since  things  are  so,  it  is  necessary  for' 
me  to  speak  distinctly  and  plainly  of  the  ap- 
propriate sphere  of  female  influence.  You 
will  have  learned,  from  what  I  have  already 
said,  that  I  do  not  differ  from  others  so  much 
in  regard  to  the  amount,  as  in  regard  to  the 
character  of  female  influence,  and  the  way  in 
which  that  influence  is  to  he  exerted.  I  do 
most  sincerely  believe,  that  woman  can,  and 
that  woman  does,  exert  a  most  powerful  in- 
fluence upon  society.  But  I,  as  sincerely, 
believe  that  the  way  in  which  she  is  to  render 
her  influence  most  salutary,  as  well  as  most 
powerful,  is  by  the  cheerful  and  regular  and 
faithful  discharge  of  the  duties  of  private,  do- 
mestic and  social  life.  Her  influence  must 
come  upon  us,  not  with  a  mighty  rush,  like  a 
tornado — not  with  loud  professions  and  bois- 
terous appeals,  in  a  striking  and  visible  man- 
ner. If  it  does,  we  shall  nerve  ourselves  to 
withstand  its  power.  But,  if,  like  the  atmos- 
phere around  us,  it  is  silent  and  unobserved — 
sending  its  purifying  and  health-giving  influ- 


200  YOUNG    LADY'S  AID. 

ences  through  every  nerve  and  fibre  and  mus- 
cle of  the  social  system,  while  its  modes  of  op- 
eration are  unseen  and  unfelt,  then  shall  we 
yield  to  its  power  and  rejoice  in  its  salutary 
effects.  To  be  more  particular,  I  would  say 
that,  in  any  village,  town  or  city,  the  character 
of  female  society  will  exert  a  most  powerful 
influence  upon  the  general  social  character  of 
the  place.  Th«  more  solid  and  substantial, 
the  more  prudent  and  economical,  (he  more 
given  to  useful  reading,  improving  reflection 
and  industrious  habits  are  the  ladies,  in  any 
place,  the  more  will  the  general  social  char- 
acter of  that  place  be  improved  in  these  re- 
spects. In  short,  I  siocerly  believe  that  the 
more  there  is  of  sound  knowledge,  of  wise 
discretion,  of  pure  feeling,  of  refined  affection 
and  of  elevated  sentiment  among  the  ladies 
of  any  particular  community,  the  more  of 
these  there  will  be  in  the  general  social  char- 
acter of  that  community. — All  this  I  say  I  sin- 
cerely believe.  You  perceive,  therefore,  that 
I  am  strong  in  the  belief  that  every  lady,  as 
well  as  every  other  human  being,  must  exert 
some  influence,  either  for  good  or  for  evil,  and 
17* 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  201 

that  I  have  as  exalted  an  opinion,  as  any  one 
can  have,  of  the  amount  of  the  influence  which 
ladies  can  and  do  exert. 

But  I  believe,  most  fully,  that  female  influ- 
ence is  most  salutary,  most  powerful  and  most 
becoming  to  female  character,  when  it  ope- 
rates indirectly,  silently  and  without  any  strik- 
ing manifestations,  when  it  arises  from  the 
cheerful  and  regular  discharge  cf  private  and 
domestic  duties^  rather  than  from  any  open 
and  direct  and  public  efforts.  But  how  so, 
you  will  ask  ?  How  will  a  cheerful  discharge 
of  duties,  which  are  altogether  of  a  retired  and 
private  character,  exert  a  more  powerful  and 
salutary  influence  upon  the  community,  than 
more  open  and  direct  efforts  ?  I  will  answer 
by  an  illustration.  Suppose  that  three  fourths 
of  the  ladies  of  any  particular  place,  are  pro- 
fessors of  religion,  technically  so  called,  con- 
nected with  some  one  of  the  various  Christian 
churches  there  established. — Suppose  that 
many  of  these  have  fathers,  husbands,  broth- 
ers or  sons,  who  are  comparatively  indifferent 
to  ihe  subject  of  religion.  Suppose,  still  fur- 
iher,  that  facts  would  warrant  the  assertioi 


202  YOUNG  LADY'S   AID 

that  these  three  fourths  wore  by  far  the  most 
exemplary  Indies  in  the  place,  the  most  cheer- 
ful and  happy,  the  most  diligent  and  indns- 
Irious,  the  most  prudent  and  economical,  the 
most  discreet  in  all  their  language,  the  most 
obedient  daughters,  the  most  affectionate  sis- 
ters, the  most  devoted  wives,  the  most  faith- 
ful mothers.  Suppose,  I  say,  that  such  were 
the  marked  and  known  character  of  the  reli- 
gious portion  of  the  females.  Would  not  la- 
thers, I  ask,  and  husbands,  brothers  and  sons, 
be  filled,  by  this  circumstance,  with  deep  and 
heartfelt  respect  for  religion  ?  Would  they 
not  rejoice  in  its  institutions  and  influence, 
and  contribute  liberally  and  willingly  to  its 
support  ?  Nay  more,  would  they  not  be  pre- 
pared to  examine  with  candor  its  claims,  and 
would  they  not  be  moved  to  this  examination, 
when  they  perceived  that  it  was  operating  to 
make  better  daughters,  better  wives,  better 
sisters,  better  mothers  ?  And  would  there 
not  be  a  thousand  silent  and  unseen,  but  pow- 
erful streams  of  influence  constantly  flowing 
forth  from  this  general  character  of  the  reli- 
gious portion  of  the  female  community,  to  pu- 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  203 

rify  and  make  glad  the  place  of  their  resi- 
dence? Upon  this  supposition,  these  reli- 
gious females  are  exerting  a  salutary  and  a 
powerful  influence  upon  the  community.  And 
how  are  they  doing  this?  Simply  by  the 
cheerful  and  faithful  discharge  of  their  private, 
domestic  and  social  duties. 

Now  let  us  turn  to  another  picture.  Sup- 
pose that  these  three  fourths  become  deeply 
anxious  for  the  religious  improvement  of 
those  near  and  dear  to  them,  and  suffer  their 
anxiety  to  move  them  to  direct  and  open  ef- 
forts, in  order  to  produce  striking  and  visible 
results.  Suppose  that,  on  some  afternoon  of 
the  week  you  see  these  ladies,  young  and  old, 
married  and  unmarried,  assembling  from  all 
directions.  You  inquire  the  cause.  The 
answer  is,  these  are  our  Christian  ladies. 
They  are  assembling  to  unite  in  social  prayer 
for  their  unconverted  husbands,  fathers,  broth- 
ers, sons.  Suppose  that  when  these  husbands 
or  fathers  return  to  their  homes,  harrassed  and 
worn  down  with  the  cares  and  labors  of  their 
business,  they  find  the  ordinary  duties  of  the 
house  neglected,  domestics  unfaithful,  child* 


204  TOUNO  LADY'S  A.ID. 

ren  out  of  temper,  and  every  thing  in  confu- 
sion, and,  when  they  inquire  for  her,  vvhof 
should  guide  the  house,  are  told  that  she  is 
gone  to  the  prayer  meeting,  where  ladies  unite 
in  praying  for  their  unconverted  friends  and 
relatives.  Suppose,  siill  further,  that  when 
these  ladies  return,  it  is  with  hearts  overflow- 
ing with  zeal,  inflamed  by  the  exercises  in 
which  they  have  just  taken  part  and  address 
themselves  at  once  to  those  for  whom  they 
have  been  praying  iu  direct  and  earnest  exhor- 
tation. What,  suppose  you,  would  he  the  ef- 
fect of  these  direct  efforts  ?  Would  they  be 
productive  of  good  results?  Most  surely  not. 
And  yet,  in  all  this,  the  ladies  may  have  been 
actuated  by  pure  moiives,  and  may  have  been 
aiming  at  important  objects.  But,  by  not 
pursuing  the  right  course,  by  stepping  aside 
from  their  appropriate  duties,  and  attempting 
open  and  direct  efforts — they  would  fail  to  ac- 
complish the  good  which  they  otherwise  might 
have  accomplished.  And  you  thus  see  ho\v 
it  is,  that  I  suppose  a  cheerful  discharge  of  ap- 
propriate duties  will  do  more  for  the  regener- 
ation of  the  community  than  any  open  and  di- 
reel  efforts. 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE  205 

I  have  pointed  out  what  I  regard  as  the 
proper  sphere  of  female  influence,  retired  from 
public  view,  in  cheerful  employments  of  do- 
mestic and  social  life.  But  why,  you  will  ask 
do  I  regard  private  and  social  life  as  the  pe- 
culiar and  appropriate  sphere  of  woman?  To 
this  questron  I  have  two  answers  to  give,  for 
this  opinion  I  have  two  reasons  to  assign. 
But  hefore  stating  these  reasons,  it  is  neces- 
sary to  make  two  or  three  preliminary  remarks. 
And  first,  I  would  remark,  that  individual  ca- 
ses are  to  be  estimated  by  a  reference  to  gen- 
eral principles.  What  it  is  right  and  proper 
for  one  lady  to  do,  it  is  light  for  .all  ladies 
similarly  situated  to  do.  If  one  lady,  under 
peculiar  impressions,  may  go  forth  as  a  public 
herald,  every  other  lady,  under  the  same  im- 
pressions, may  go  forth  in  the  same  way, 
unless  some  peculiarity  in  their  situations 
should  point  out  a  different  course  of  duty. 
When  we  read  tint  Mrs.- -addressed  an  as- 
sembly, we  learn  that  she  may  be  a  wife.  It 
may  be  too,  that  she  is  a  mother.  If  so,  she 
lias  then  duties  to  perform  as  a  wife  or  a  moth- 
er, these  dutiss  she  must  neglect  while  ad- 
18 


206  PEMALK  INFLUENCE 

dressing  this  public  assembly.  When  we 
read  that  Miss addressed  a  public  assem- 
bly, we  know  that  she  is  a  daughter.  It  may 
bethat  she  is  a  sister.  If  so,  she  has  duties 
as  a  daughter  or  a  sister,  which  she  must  and 
does  neglect  while  addressing  the  public  as- 
sembly. If  it  is  right  that  these  individuals 
should  pursue  this  course, it  is  right  that  every 
other  wife,  mother,  daughter  or  sister,  under 
the  same  impressions,  and  in  the  same  circum- 
stances, should  pursue  the  same  course.  Now 
we  may  not  think  it  of  much  importance  if  a 
solitary  lady,  here  and  there,  pursues  these 
courses.  But  should  we  not  be  startled  at 
the  thought,  that  the  whole  face  of  society  is 
to  be  changed,  and,  that  the  majority  of  ladies 
are  to  step  forward  in  this  way?  Would  it  be 
fight,  would  it  be  proper?  Does  the  lady 
say  she  has  a  special  call  from  God?  Let  her 
make  it  appear.  The  call  is  generally  an  im- 
pression upon  her  own  mind.  It  may  be  a 
delusion.  There  is  no  evidence  that  it  is  from 
God  which  she  can  set  before  others.  Every 
one  else,  who  may  fancy  she  has  a  call, 
may  go  forth.  Does  the  lady  say  that  the 


FEMALE     INFLUENCE  207 

duties  which  she  neajects  are  performed  hy 
some  one  else?  It  may  be  so.  But  this  does 
not  relieve  her  of  her  responsibility.  It  was 
her  duty  to  perform  them  or  to  see  to  their 
performance,  for  they  were,  upon  the  suppo- 
sition, her  duties.  Does  the  lady  say,  as  I 
have  heard  a  mother  say,  that  she  can  per- 
form her  duties  to  her  children  and  her  family 
and  still  have  time  to  devote  to  other  and 
more  distant  public  matters?  I  answer,  that 
she  is  a  wonderful  woman,  that,  in  my  inter- 
course with  society,  I  have  seldom  found  a 
mother,  who  had  any  thing  like  a  true  con- 
ception of  the  vast  responsibilities  connected 
wiih  the  charge  of  a  single  child,  of  the  solemn 
nature  of  the  duty  of  training  up  a  single 
immortal  spirit,  as  it  should  be  trained,  for 
this  world  and  for  the  spiritual  and  eternal 
world.  I  fear,  therefore,  that  the  person  who 
would  make  such  a  remark,  has  never  thought 
or  felt  as  she  should  think  and  feel  in  regard  to 
the  trust  committed  to  her,  the  responsibili- 
ties imposed  upon  her. 

Does  the  individual  say,   I  feel  a    responsi- 
bility in  regard  to  these  great  and   important 


203  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

interests  ?  I  would  ask  if  God  has  imposed 
that  responsibiliiy  upon  her  in  particular  ? — if 
there  are  not"  other  responsibilities  nearer 
home,  which  she  is  neglecting — and  in  re- 
gard to  which  there  can  be  no  doubt  that  God 
imposed  them  upon  her  in  particular  ?  Does 
the  individual  point  to  female  scripture  char- 
acters, as  cases  where  females  were  called  to 
step  forward  before  the  public?  I  answer 
that  in  such  cases,  there  were  circumstances 
in  providence  which  marked  out  these  cases 
to  the  community,  as  exceptions  to  the  gener- 
al course  of  female  duty.  If  any  of  you  then, 
young  ladies,  feel  prompted  to  step  forth  be~ 
fore  the  public,  remember  that  you  are  doing; 
all  in  your  power  to  introduce  such  practices 
into  general  vogue  among  the  female  portico, 
of  the  community. 

I  would  remark,  in  the  second  place,  that 
the  question  is  not,  what  ladies  have  a  right  to 
do,  but  what  it  is  light  for  them  to  do.  La- 
dies have  a  ri^ht  to  speak  in  public.  There 
is  no  law  of  the  land  to  prevent  them.  Bui 
is  it  riyhf,  proper  and  expedient,  that  they 


YOUNC  LADYS  AID. 

should  do  this — and  that  all  should  do  this  ? 
This  is  the  question. 

I  remark,  in  the  third  place,  that  ladies, 
who  take  this  course,  must  be  willing  to  abide 
by  its  natural  consequences.  Ladies  expect 
to  be  treated  by  gentlemen  with  polite  atten- 
tions, and  a  gallant  delicacy,  differently  from 
the  way  in  which  men  treat  each  other.  How 
often  is  the  expression  of  wonder  heard,  from 
the  lips  of  females,  that  one  could  so  treat  a 
lady.  But,  if  the  lady  comes  forward  into  the 
arena  of  debate,  into  the  noisy  bustle  and  busy 
stir  of  public  affairs  and  transac!  ions,  she 
must  expect  to  meet  with  the  same  treatment, 
which,  under  the  same  circumstances,  she 
would  meet  with,  were  she  not  a  lady.  It  is  an 
old  saying,  'ifyou  play  with  boys  you  must  take 
boys  play.'  So,  if  ladies  mingle  with  men  in 
public,  they  must  take  the  same  treatment 
which  men  render  to  each  other.  They  must 
be  willing  to  forego  all  polite  and  delicate  at- 
tentions. They  must  be  willing  to  abide  by 
the  natural  consequences  of  the  course  they 
choose  to  pursue. I  have  thus  stated  certain  gen- 
eral principles,which  may  aid  you  in  determin- 


210  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

ing  the  question  as   to  your  duty  in  this  re- 
spect. 

I  will  now  state  my  reasons  for  believing  that 
private  and  domestic  life,  is  the  peculiar  and 
appropriate  sphere  of  female  duly  and  female 
influence.  These  reason,  I  have  said,  were 
two  ;  the  one  is  drawn  from  the  very  nature 
of  the  case,  the  other  from  the  instructions 
of  God's  word. 

And  first,  from  the  nature  of  the  case.  In 
all  civilized  society,  the  duties  and  efforts  of 
the  community  are  divided  into  two  distinct 
classes.  There  are  the  hard  labors  of  life 
and  the  anxious  cares  of  business  on  the  one 
hand,  and  the  regulation  of  the  private,  house- 
hold, domestic  concerns  on  the  other  Does 
a  family  remove  to  the  western  wilds,  there  is 
the  same  division.  There  is  the  felling  of 
trees  and  the  clearing  of  land,  on  the  one 
hand,  there  is  the  preparation  of  food,  the  ma- 
king and  keeping  in  order  apparrel,  the  train- 
ing and  watching  of  children  on  the  other. 
So,  in  our  cities,  there  is  the  same  distinction. 
The  anxieties  and  cares  of  business  on  the 
one  hand,  the  regulation  of  household  duties 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE  211 

and  domestic  labors  on  the  other.  It  is  im- 
portant that  both  these  classes  of  duties  should 
be  well  and  intelligibly  performed.  If  either 
are  neglected,  society  must  suffer,  If  the  la- 
bors abroad  and  the  cares  of  business  are  neg- 
lected, the  community  will  suffer  want.  li 
the  affairs  within,  of  families  and  of  house- 
holds be  neglected  the  comfort  and  happiness 
of  individuals  and  of  families  will  be  much  di- 
minished. Now  what  division  of  labors  shall 
there  be,  to  correspond  with  this  distinction, 
which  every  where  exists?  Will  females  go 
forth  to  all  the  labors  and  anxieties  of  busi- 
ness ?  Will  they  plough  our  fields,  enter  our 
workshops  and  our  counting  houses,  or  sail 
our  vessels?  And  shall  the  men  remain 
within,  rocking  the  cradle,  tending  the  sick, 
or  wielding  the  implements  of  cookery  ? — 
This,  you  all  see,  would  be  absurd.  But  if 
the  man  must  engage  in,  and  carry  on  all 
these  important  and  wide  spread  transactions 
of  business,  he  also  must  attend  to  all  politi- 
cal movement,  and  all  law  making  and  law 
administering  wants  of  the  community,  and  all 
public  efforts  of  every  kind.  Because  all  these 


212  Youxe  LADY'S  AID. 

are  connected  more  directly  with  the  interests 
of  business  and  not  with  the  domestic  cares 
of  social  life.  The  currency  question  for  ex- 
ample has  reference  to  the  business  interests 
of  the  community  and  affects  social  and  mor- 
al interests,  through  the  instrumentality  of 
these  business  interests.  So  the  annexation  of 
Texas  to  the  Uuion,  a  subject  upon  which 
ladies  have  petitioned,  is  a  political  question, 
having  primary  and  special  reference  to  the 
political  relations  of  the  country.  There 
would,  then,  be  just  as  much  propriety,  in 
our  ladies  circulating  petitions  fo:  or  against  a 
national  bank,  as  for  or  against  the  annexation 
of  Texas.  True,  it  is  said  that  this  involves, 
to  a  great  degree,  interest  of  a  moral  nature. 
And  what  question  of  public,  political  action 
does  not  involve  moral  consequences?  I  say, 
then,  that  from  the  very  nature  of  the  case,  I 
draw  the  conclusion  that  public  labors  of  leg- 
islation, business  or  philanthropy,  do  not  fall 
within  the  appropriate  sphere  of  woman. 
The  steps  from  which  the  conclusion  is  drawn, 
are  these.  There  is,  and  from  the  very  na- 
ture of  the  case,  there  must  be  two  distinct 
16* 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE  213 

classes  of  duties.  One  of  these,  females  can- 
not, from  their  very  physical  constitution, 
perform,  and  with  this  class  of  duties  are  in- 
timately connected  all  public  movements 
whether  of  a  political,  religious  or  philanthro- 
pic character,  therefore,  from  the  very  nature 
of  the  case,  all  public  efforts  of  this  character, 
are  inappropriate  to  woman.  Woman,  as  I 
have  already  said,  has  influence,  but  she  is 
to  exert  that  influence  by  remaining  within 
her  appropriate  sphere.  If  she  steps  aside 
from  this,  sho  forgoes  the  opportunity  of 
certain  usefulness,  in  the  proper  discharge  of 
her  duties,  and  enters  a  field,  where  it  is  alto- 
gether problematical,  whether  the  results  of 
her  efforts  will  be  good  or  evil  to  the  commu- 
nity, while  the  effects  upon  her  own  charac- 
ter, upon  her  retiring  modesty  and  feminine 
delicacy,  which  are  so  becoming  in  woman, 
are  any  thing  but  good. 

But  what,  you  may  ask,  does  Christianity 
teach  upon  this  subject  ?  In  seeking  an  an- 
swer to  this  question,  let  us  first  look  at  some 
fac'.s  in  the  gospel  history.  When  our  Saviour 
was  upon  earth,  there  were  among  the  crowds 


214  YOUNG  LADY'S    AID 

who  flocked  to  hear  his  words,  many  females. 
They  become  interested  in  him  and  in  his  in- 
structions. He  became  interested  in  them. 
He  taught  females,  as  well  as  others,  the  doc- 
trines and  principles  of  his  religion,  and  found 
them  soon  becoming  wholly  absorbed  in  the 
contemplation  of  its  truths,  and  wholly  de- 
voted to  its  influence.  Do  you  suppose  thot 
among  all  his  followers,  he  found  one  more 
absorbed,  more  devoted  than  was  Mary  the 
sister  of  Lazarus?  I  presume  not.  But  not- 
withstanding our  Saviour  was  surrounded,  as 
it  were,  with  females,  was  deeply  interested 
in  them,  imparted  to  them  religious  instruc- 
tion and  found  them  devoted  to  his  religion 
notwithstanding,!  say  all  this, he  did  not  choose 
one  female  to  be  of  the  number  of  his  apostles. 
Nor  was  this  for  the  want  of  mental  improve- 
ment on  the  part  of  the  females.  For  they, 
surely,  were  as  well  qualified,  in  this  respect 
as  the  humble  fisherman,  whom  he  chose. 
But  he  did  not  call  one  female  from  the  quiet 
scenes  of  her  home,  and  send  her  forth  to  pro- 
claim the  gospel,  either  in  public  assemblies, 
or  from  house  to  house.  And  may  we  not 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  215 

fairly  conclude,  that  the  reason  was,  that  he 
did  not  regard  these  as  coming  within  the  ap- 
propriate sphere  of  female  efforts.  Suppose 
then, our  Saviour  were  now  on  earth,  the  her- 
ald of  any  of  the  specific  philanthropic  move- 
ments of  the  day.  He  would  undoudtedly  be 
surrounded  by  female?,  would  be  interested  in 
them,  would  instruct  them  in  his  principles  and 
views,  and  would  find  them  zealous  friends 
of  these  views.  But,  if  guided  by  the  same 
principles,  which  ware  manifested  in  his  con- 
duct, when  he  was  on  earth,  he  would  not  call 
one  female  from  the  quiet  of  her  home,  to 
send  her  forth  as  a  herald  of  these  movements 
either  in  public  or  from  house  to  house.  Young, 
ladies,  let  the  fact,  which  1  have  here  brought 
before  you,  have  its  proper  influence  upon 
your  feelings.  Christ  is  interested  in  you, 
his  religion  has  bestowed  great  favors  upon 
you,  and  he  asks  of  you  an  entire  devotion  of 
affections  of  energies  and  influence  to  his  cause. 
But  he  does  not  ask,  he  nerer  has,  asked  you 
to  leave  your  appropriate  spheres  of  duty,  and 
go  forth  as  heralds  and  apostles  of  truth  and* 
goodness. 


216  YOUNG  LADY'*   AID 

But  here  you  will  tell  me  that  Paul  often 
sends  salutations  to  females,  who  are  his  fel- 
low laborers,  his  helpers  in  the  gospel.  This 
is  true.  Paul  had  his  fellow  laborers,  even 
among  females.  But  here  another  question 
arises. — Were  they  fellow  laborers,  because 
they  performed  the  same  kind  of  labor  which 
the  apostle  was  performing,  or  because,  in 
their  appropriate  sphere,  they  were  laboring 
for  the  same  great  purposes  ?  That  we  may 
know  something  of  Paul's  ideas  as  to  the  ap- 
propriate sphere  of  female  effort,  I  will  quote 
a  few  of  his  injunctions  upon  this  point.  In 
the  first  Epistle  to  the  Corinthians,  14  :  34,35, 
we  read,  'Let  your  women  keep  silence  in  the 
churches,  for  it  is  not  permitted  onto  them  to 
speak.  But  they  are  commanded  to  be  under 
obediance,  as  saith  the  law,'  and,  if  they  will 
learn  any  thing,  let  them  ask  their  husbands 
at  home,  for  it  is  a  shame  for  a  woman  to  speak 
in  church. — 1st  Timothy,  2d  chap,  llth  and 
12th.  Let  the  woman  bear  in  silence,  in  all 
subjection,  but  I  suffer  not  a  woman  to  teach, 
nor  to  usurp  authority  over  the  man,  but  to  bo 
insilence.  1st  Tim.  8:  13,  14.  And  withall, 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE 


217 


they  learn  to  be  idle,  wandering  about  from 
house  to  house,  and  not  only  idlers,  but  tat- 
tlers also,  and  busy  bodies,  speaking  things 
which  they  ought  not.  I  will,  therefore,  that 
the  younger  women  marry — guide  the  house, 
give  none  occasion  to  the  adversary  to  speak 
reproachfully.  Titus  2.  3,  4,  5. — The  aged 
women,  likewise,  that  they  be  in  beha- 
viour as  becometh  holiness,  not  false  accu- 
sers, not  given  to  mad  wine,  teachers  of  good 
things,  that  they  may  teach  the  young  women 
to  be  sober,  to  love  their  husbands,  to  love 
their  children,  to  be  discreet,  chaste,  Areep- 
ers  at  home,  good,  obedient  to  their  own 
husbands,  that  the  word  of  God  may  not  be 
blasphemed.  I  have  quoted  these  expres- 
sions as  bearing  directly  upon  the  general 
subject  of  present  inquiry,  the  proper  sphere 
of  female  effort  and  influence.  And  from 
these  expressions  we  may  learn  the  apostle's 
views  upon  the  subject,  and  may  form  some 
estimate  of  what  kind  of  assistance  he  re- 
ceived from  his  female  fellow  laborers  m 
(Christ. 


218  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

And  may  we  not,  from  all  that  has  been 
said,  draw  the  following  conclusions,  that  the 
proper  sphere  of  female  influence  is  away 
from  the  bustle  and  stir  of  business,  of  pub- 
lic life,  and  noisy  strife;  that  it  is  in  the  re- 
tired and  quiet  scenes  of  domestic  life,  or  in 
the  more  extended  circle  of  social  effort.  And 
that  the  way  in  which  her  influence  can  be 
made  most  salutary  as  well  as  most  powerful, 
is,  by  a  cheerful  performance  of  appropriate 
duties,  rather  than  by  direct  and  open  effort. 

I  have  thus  far  endeavored  to  guard  you 
against  some  strange  notions  and  practices  of 
modern  times,  and,  in  this  way,  to  point  out 
what  I  deem  correct  views  upon  the  proper 
sphere  and  appropriate  manner  of  female  in- 
fluence. 

I  am  now  to  point  out  somewhat  more  in 
detail,  the  particular  ways,  in  which  you  may 
do  good,  may  become  fellow  laborers  with 
all  who  are  striving  for  the  good  of  man. 
Here  then,  you  are  a  young  lady,  a  daughter, 
a  sister,  you  are  deeply  interested  in  all  that 
is  good,  and  desirous  of  doing  all  the  good 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE-  219 

in  your  power.  You  are  interested  in  reli- 
gion, and  ask  in  what  way  you  may  interest 
your  parents  and  your  brothers?  Here,  then, 
is  a  definite  question.  I  will  endeavor  to 
give  an  intelligible  answer.  But  you  will  re- 
member the  principle  I  have  laid  down,  that 
you  are  to  seek  to  exert  influence  by  a  cheer- 
ful discharge  of  appropriate  duties,  rather 
than  by  direct  efforts.  Let  your  interest  in 
religion  make  you  a  better  daughter,  and  bet- 
ter sister.  And  what  I  mean  by  this  is,  let 
it  make  you  less  selfish,  and  more  devoted  to 
the  happiness  of  your  parents  and  brothers. 
Here  is  the  point  where  we  all  fail,  we  carry 
our  selfishness  into  our  religion.  Have  you 
been  wild  and  gay,  seeking  for  enjoyment  in 
balls  and  assemblies,  unwilling  to  forego  the 
pleasure  to  be  derived  from  these,  that  you 
may  promote  the  happiness  of  father  or  bro- 
ther? And  are  you  now  deeply  interested 
in  religion,  but  equally  unwilling  to  forego 
the  pleasures  of  attending  upon  religious  ex- 
ercises, that  so  you  may  promote  the  happi- 
ness of  father  or  mother?  If  this  be  the  case, 


220  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

you  cannot  expect  that  your  father  or  brother 
should  respect  your  change.  To  them  you  do 
not  seem  to  be  a  new  creature,  you  seem 
only  to  have  altered  in  your  tastes.  You  are 
just  as  earnest  in  seeking  selfish  gratifications 
as  before,  only  from  this  alteration  in  your 
tastes,  you  seek  it  from  a  different  source. 
But,  if  your  father  or  your  brother,  perceives 
that  your  religion  makes  you  less  selfish,  more 
willing  to  give  up  your  own  enjoyments,  in  or- 
der to  promote  theirs,  then  will  they  regard 
it  as  a  reality. 

You  are  then,  in  the  first  place,  to  let  your 
religion  make  you  a  better  daughter,  a  better 
sister,  less  selfish,  more  willing  to  give  up 
your  enjoyments,  even  your  religious  en- 
joyments, for  their  good  than  others.  You 
are  not  merely  to  render  pleasantly  whatever 
services  may  be  asked  for,  but  you  are  to 
cherish  a  lively  interest  in  every  thing  which 
concerns  their  good  and  to  endeavor  to  an- 
ticipate their  wants  and  desires.  If  your  fa- 
ther or  your  brother  see  you  thus  changed 
from  a  selfish  devotee  of  pleasure  -to  an  ear' 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  221 

nest  devotion  to  the  good  of  all  within  the 
sphere  of  your  sympathies  and  influence,  ev- 
ervvilling  to  give  up  the  gratification  of  your 
own  wishes,  to  promote  the  happiness  of  oth- 
ers, ever  cherishing  a  lively  sympathy  in  the 
welfare  of  others,  and  ever  doing  all  in  your 
power  to  anticipate  their  wishes,  and  prevent 
their  sufferings.  If,  I  say,  your  father  and 
your  brother  see  such  a  change,  then  will  they 
respect  the  religion  you  love.  You  see  that 
your  first  effort  to  interest  your  parents  and 
brothers  in  religion  exerts  its  holiest  influ- 
ences over  your  own  hearts  and  lives,  in  mak- 
ing you  better  daughters  and  sisters.  Do  you 
ask  if  this  is  all  that  you  can  do?  Most  cer- 
tainly not.  You  may,  yon  are  in  duty  bound 
to  pray  for  these,  and  your  own  feelings  will 
prompt  you  to  a  faithful  and  fervent  perfor- 
mance of  this  duty.  But  let  these  be  your 
private  prayers,  let  your  anxieties  for  those 
who  are  near  and  dear  to  you,  be  whispered 
not  to  the  ears  of  your  lellovv  creatures,  but 
into  the  ear  of  Him  who  seeth  in  secret,  but 
who  will  reward  openly.  Then,  too,  you 
ID* 


222  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

should  avoid  the  course  which  some  take,  of 
retiring  from  the  society  of  those  you  would 
influence.  Make  yourselves  more  agreeable 
than  before,  in  all  the  endearing  fondness  of 
your  devotion  to  their  happiness.  When 
you  speak  to  them  upon  the  subject  of  reli- 
gion, speak  with  openness,  with  frankness, 
but  in  much  kind  love.  If  you  wish  them 
to  read  the  books,  which  have  deeply  affec- 
ted your  own  heart,  hand  them  the  book 
openly  and  kindly.  Their  respect  for  you, 
for  your  great  change,  and  manifest  improve- 
ment, will  secure  you  a  kind  and  attentive 
perusal  of  these  books.  But  if  you  place 
these  books  in  their  way,  as  it  were  by  stealth, 
your  apparent  want  of  confidence  will  excite 
improper  feelings,  and  will  prevent  them  from 
reading,  it  may  fill  their  hearts  with  bitterness, 
and  bring  upon  you  severe  reproaches. 

Still  further,  there  may  be  cases  in  which 
you  wish  to  caution  an  acquaintance,  and  you 
propose  to  write  an  anonymous  note  to  the 
individual.  I  would  counsel  you  not  to  do 
this.  I  have  seen  this  done  in  some  instan- 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  223 

ces  and  never  with  a  good  result.  It  often 
produces  great  mischief,  and  causes  great 
trouble  in  society.  If  your  acquaintance  with 
the  individual  be  sufficiently  intimate,  to  war- 
rant such  an  effort,  speak  openly  and  directly 
but  at  the  same  time  kindly  and  affectionately 
upon  the  subject.  Or,  if  you  prefer  writing 
as  giving  you  an  opportunity  to  be  more  full 
and  explicit,  then  I  say  write.  But  do  it 
openly.  Sign  your  own  name.  I  have  been 
called  to  duties  of  this  kind  frequently,  and 
in  no  instance  has  offence  been  taken.  Al- 
though what  you  may  write,  may  exert  no  in- 
fluence, still  respect  for  your  honesty  and 
good  wishes,  will  prevent  the  individual  from 
taking  offence.  Be  ever  open,  then,  and  di- 
rect and  speak  in  your  own  name.  If  your 
acquaintance  with  the  individual  be  not  suf- 
ficiently intimate  to  warrant  this,  then  you 
are  not  the  person  to  do  it.  You  must  speak 
to  some  one  else,  who  is  more  intimately  ac- 
quainted. 

But  still  farther,  are  you  desirous,  as    ev- 
ery virtuous  young  lady  will  be,  to  exert   an 


224  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

influence  upon  society  around  you,  to  prevent 
the  prevalence  of  dissipation  and  licentious- 
ness? And  do  you  ask  what  you  are  to  do 
to  accomplish  this?  I  answer,  first — elevate 
your  own  characters,  in  all  that  is  pure  and 
noble  and  worthy,  in  intellectual  improve- 
ment, and  moral  refinement.  Lot  your 
characters  for  intelligence,  for  rational  and 
sober  conversation,  for  moral  refinement  and 
purity,  be  such,  that  all  may  find  your  soci- 
ety improving,  in  its  influences  upon  them, 
that  all  when  they  leave  your  company,  may 
be  filled  with  heartfelt  respect  for  you  and 
may  desire  again  to  enjoy  your  conversation. 
It  is  here,  I  believe,  that  many  young  ladies 
fail.  They  lay  up  no  store  of  useful  knowl- 
edge they  do  not  cultivate  their  moral  pow- 
ers, and  our  young  men  are  compelled  to 
say,  we  see  but  little  difference  between  the 
intellectual  and  moral  improvement  of  these, 
the  virtuous,  and  of  those  who  are  abandon- 
ed. We  find  as  much  frivolity  and  vanity, 
in  the  one  class,  as  in  the  other.  In  acquir- 
ing a  public  education,  one  has  an  opportu- 


FEMALE     INFLUENCE.  225 

nity  of  studying  human  nature  in  all  the  va- 
rieties of  human  character,  and  especially  has 
he  an  opportunity  of  learning  the  feelings 
which  precede  action,  which  lie  at  the  foun- 
dation of  worth  and  usefulness,  or  are  the 
seeds  of  future  dissipation  and  misery.  And 
in  these  scenes,  my  own  observation  has 
taught  me,  that  one  of  the  strongest  safeguards 
by  which  a  young  man  can  be  protected,  is 
that  of  deep  and  heartfelt  respect  and  sincere 
esteem  for  the  worth  of  female  character. — 
With  those  who  have  always  associated  with 
young  ladies  of  sterling  worth,  and  who  have 
acquired  a  fondness  for  the  society  of  such, 
the  thoughts  of  dissipation  and  licentiousness 
fill  the  soul  with  horror.  On  the  other  hand, 
one  of  the  first  steps  toward  licentiousness  is 
a  contempt  for  female  character.  Let  a 
young  man  of  mind,  always  meet  with  the 
vain  and  the  frivolous  among  young  ladies, 
and  he  learns  to  look  upon  them,  not  as  in- 
telligent and  moral  beings,  not  as  equals  and 
companions,  whose  society  may  improve  him, 
but  as  play  things.  When  in  their  presence 


226  YOUNG  LIDY'S  AID. 

she  lays  aside  all  reasonable  conversation  and 
adapts  himself  to  what  he  may  consider  their 
capacities  and  tastes.  And  it  is  but  a  step 
from  regarding  them  as  toys  for  an  hour's 
amusement,  to  regard  them. as  created  mere- 
ly for  the  gratification  of  passion.  I  say, 
then,  that  would  you  exert  an  influence  in 
promoting  the  moral  improvement  and  moral 
reformation  of  society,  improve  yourselves,  in 
all  that  is  pure  and  good.  Seek  to  store 
your  minds  with  useful  knowledge,  to  exer- 
cise your  mental  powers  upon  the  knowledge 
which  you  do  acquire.  Let  your  standard 
of  intelligence,  of  moral  and  social  worth  be 
high.  Make  yourselves  worthy  of  respect 
and  esteem.  This,  I  can  assure  you,  will,  of 
itself,  do  more  for  the  moral  reformation  of 
the  community,  than  all  female  moral  reform 
societies,  than  all  ferretting  out  and  exposing 
the  peccadilios  of  your  fellow  creatures,  than 
all  railing  and  exclusion. 

In  the  second  place,  I  remark,  that  in 
your  intercourse  with  society,  you  should  en- 
deavor to  show  that  you  respect  worth  of 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  227 

character,  and  are  not  carried  away  by  the 
mere  fascination  of  manners.  Let  me  illus- 
trate what  I  mean.  I  have  known  respecta- 
ble and  virtuous  young  ladies  occupy  them- 
selves, in  a  social  party,  in  ridiculing,  among 
themselves  a  young  man  of  sterling  worth, 
who,  from  not  having  been  much  in  society, 
was  somewhat  awkward  in  his  manners,  while 
they  would  be  all  smiles  and  all  attention  to 
one  of  known,  or  strongly  suspected  dissi- 
pated habits,  whose  manners  were  graceful. 
And  I  have  sometimes  felt  that  those  young 
men,  who,  by  an  intercourse  with  the  out- 
cast of  your  own  sex,  have  acquired  a  sort 
of  don't  care  ease  of  manners,  were  gener- 
ally received  with  more  favor,  than  those  of 
the  greatest  worth,  whose  manners  were 
awkward.  I  trust  that  this  is  not  generally 
the  case,  but  I  know  that  sometimes  it  is  so. 
And  what  is  the  consequence?  The  feeling 
grows  up,  that  in  order  to  acquire  those  man- 
ners which  are  necessary  as  a  passport  in  fe- 
male society,  one  must  mingle  in  that  which 
is  vicious.  Diffident  young  men  of  worth 


228  YOUNG   LADl's  AID. 

are  driven  from  your  society,  and  the  profli- 
gate and  abandoned  are  encouraged  in  th«ir 
course.  These  things  ought  not  so  to  be. 
You  ought  to  show  that  you  respect  worth 
of  character,  and  are  not  to  be  carried  away 
by  that  don't  care  ease  of  manners,  that 
modest  as  it  is  sometimes  called,  assurance, 
1  had  almost  said,  that  cool  imprudence,  with 
which  young  ladies  are  sometimes  pleased. 
I  do  not  say  in  what  way  you  are  to  manifest 
this  regard  for  worth  of  character.  Because 
I  suppose,  different  persons,  according  to 
iheir  different  temperaments  and  habits,  will 
manifest  this  in  different  ways.  But  I  do 
not  say  that  in  some  way,  you  must  make  your 
regard  for  real  worth  of  character  seen  and 
felt. 

Still  further,  you,  young  ladies,  I  had  al- 
most said,  preside  over  the  social  amusements 
of  the  community.  If  you  are  willing  to 
stoop  to  low  and  silly  plays,  these  will  be  the 
order  of  social  amusements.  If  you  are 
given  to  balls  and  amusements  of  this  char- 
acter, the  character  of  the  community  will 


FEMALE     INFLUENCE. 


229 


take    its    coloring  from   your    feelings.      It 
is  for  you  to  say  in  a  great  degree,  what    shall 
be  the  character  of  the  amusements   of   soci- 
ety.    That  is,  you  can   control  these  things, 
provided  you    will    manifest   an    interest    in 
some  sort  of  amusements.     The  young    will 
have  amusements,  and  young  men    will    have 
recreations.     If  young  ladies  withhold     their 
countenance  altogether  from   amusements   ot 
every   kind,   the  only  consequence  will   be, 
that  young  men  will  resort  to  those  which  are 
low  and  degrading.     But  if  the  more  intelli- 
gent portion  of  the    female    community    will 
take  the  lead  and  manifest  an  interest  in  those 
amusements  which  are  of  a  pure  and   heart- 
felt and    elevating  character,  then     will   the 
young  men  be  prevented  from  low  and    base 
indulgences.       At  least   those    whose   pure 
feelings  and  healthy  tastes  have  not  been  per- 
verted, may   be  saved.     You    can    by    your 
free  and  social  intercourse  with   your   broth- 
er's friends  and  acquaintances,  by    your    mu- 
sic, if  blest  with  a   musical  talent,    you    can 
.make  their  visits  to  your  fathers  house  pleas- 
20 


YO»N-G  LADY'S  AID. 

ant.  Perhaps  you  may  in  this  manner,  do 
something  to  promote  those  social  and  do- 
mestic habits  and  feelings  which  are  so  im- 
portant to  the  safety  of  the  young.  I  would 
therefore  urge  you  who  are  daughters  and 
sisters  to  lend  your  influence  by  doing  all  in 
your  powef  to  make  your  home  pleasant  to 
those  who  may  visit  there,  by  doing  all  in 
your  power  to  raise  the  tone  of  conversation, 
to  give  freedom  and  ease  to  social  inter- 
course, and  to  introduce  those  social  and  do- 
mestic pleasures,  which  may  take  the  place 
of  others  which  are  injurious  in  their  nature 
and  tendency. 

I  have  thus  pointed  out  some  of  the  ways, 
in  which  you  may  labor  for  the  moral  reform 
of  the  community,  by  elevating  and  improving 
your  own  character,  by  shewing,  in  some  mark- 
ed manner,  that  you  respect  moral  and  intrin- 
sic worth  of  character,  and  are  not  captivated 
by  mere  gracefulness  of  manner,  when  all  ;'& 
hollow  beneath,  and  by  doing  all  in  your  pow- 
er to  introduce  amusements  of  a  pure  and 
healthful  character.  In  these  ways  you  mav 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  231 

do  something*,  you  may  do  much  towards  the 
moral  reformation  and  improvement  ofsociety. 
I  do  not  indeed  suppose  that,  here  or  any 
where  else,  the  particular  influence  of  individ- 
ual females  will  be  visible  and  striking.  But 
I  do  believe  that  a  sitent  influence  will  go  forth 
elevating  the  tone  and  character  of  female 
intercourse,  and  that  this  influence,  though 
silent,  will  be  felt  throughout  the  community. 
But  you  ask,  what  shall  we  do  about  joining 
these  female  moral  reform  societies  ?  In  an- 
swer to  your  question,  I  would  speak  distinct- 
ly, and  say  have  nothingto  do  with  them.  But 
why,  you  ask,  do  I  object  ?  I  answer,  lhat  the 
principles  and  the  modes  of  operation  in  these 
societies,  I  believe  to  be  unsound.  What 
are  these  principles  ?  I  will  name  one,  and 
lhat  is,  that  safety  is  to  be  found  in  nn  expos- 
ure of  the  vice,  a  familiarity  with  all  its  haunts 
and  avenues  and  manifestations.  This  prin- 
ciple, I  believe  to  be  unsound.  I  believe 
that  a  young  lady's  safety  consists  in  ignorance 
of  these  evil  ways,  when  it  is  accompanied, 
as  it  usually  and  naturally  is  with  that  native 


232  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

and  shrinking    delicacy,  which  causes  her  to 
draw  back,  as  if  with  instinctive  horror,  from 
the  very  appearance  of  evil,  from  every  word, 
look  or  allusion  which  may  seem  to    partake 
in  the  least  possible  degree  of  the  vice.  This 
is  my  theoretical  conclusion.     It   is   confirm- 
ed by  the  statements  of  an  article,  which  ap- 
peared,   sometime   since   in    the    New  York 
Literary  and    Theological  Review,   an    able 
Journal.     The  writer  of  the  article,  vtho  pro- 
fessed to  have  enjoyed  opportunities  for  judg- 
ing, asserts  that  this  course  of  publicly  expo- 
sing or  advertising  these    haunts  of   iniquity, 
has  actually,  in  the  experiment,  tended  to  in- 
crease and  extend  the  evil  in  question.  And, 
indeed  we  need  not  have  gone  to  these  state- 
ments   for   this  information.     For,    when    I 
have  looked  at  the  papers  issued  by  the  New 
York  Female  Moral  Reform  Society,  I    have 
felt  that  the  young  lady  who  could  take  pleas- 
ure in  reading  those  papers,    must  have    lost 
much  of  her  native  and    instinctive   delicacy 
of  feeling,  while    the  dissipated    young  man, 
who  should  look  into  them,  might  mistake 


FEMALE  INFLUENCE.  233 

them  for  the  heralds  pf  licentiousness,  serv- 
ing as  a  directory  in  regard  to  its  haunts,  and 
setting  forth  such  pictorial  descriptions,  as 
might  be  supposed  to  be  the  excitements  to 
indulgence.  I  might,  my  friends,  give  other 
reasons.  But  have  I  not  said  enough  ?  I 
respect  the  pure  motives,  and  the  holy  de- 
sires of  those  who  engage  in  these  efforts. — • 
But  I  must  dissent  from  their  judgment,  and 
dissenting  as  I  do,  I  must,  in  faithfulness  to 
my  office,  counsel  my  friends  to  have  nothing 
to  do  with  these  Female  Moral  Reform  So- 
cieties. 

And  what  shall  we  do,  you  ask,  in  regard 
to  Temperance  and  Temperance  Societies? 
I  answer,  that  the  evils  of  Intemperance  have 
formerly,  and  in  many  cases,  originated  with 
females.  Mothers  and  nurses  have  drugged 
the  helpless  infant  with  alcoholic  drinks,  until 
without  doubt,  the  foundation  has  been  laid 
for  future  intemperance.  Then  too,  females, 
young  ladies  even,  have  done  much  in  former 
times  by  giving  their  countenance  to  the 
drinking  of  pledges  with  their  friends,  to  pro- 
30* 


234  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

mote  the  cause  of  intemperance.  In  these 
and  in  other  ways  females  have  been  lending 
their  influence  to  the  advancement  of  intem- 
perance. Since  such  is  the  case,  it  is  impor- 
tant that  they  should  make  themselves  ac- 
quainted with  the  subject,  and  should  take 
an  open  and  active  part  in  this  reformation. 
But  here,  as  in  regard  to  every  other  effort, 
let  their  exertions  be,  not  those  of  public  lec- 
tures, nor  even  of  active  visitants  from  house 
to  house,  but  in  the  appropriate  discharge  of 
the  duties  of  their  own  sphere.  Is  any  one 
of  you,  young  ladies,  about  to  give  a  party  ? 
Here,  without  stepping  beyond  your  proper 
sphere,  you  can  exert  an  influence,  you  can 
say  this  my  party,  and  this  the  entertainment 
for  my  friends,  shall  not  be  polluted  by  intox- 
icating drinks.  And,  by  so  doing  you  will 
accomplish  two  things,  you  will  wipe  your 
own  hands  from  all  participation  in  the  evil, 
even  should  some,  whose  appetites  are  crav- 
ing, go  from  your  party  to  places  of  indul- 
gence. And  in  the  second  place,  you  will 
do  something,  in  this  way,  to  change  the  fash- 


FEMALE  INFLUENCE.  235 

ions  of  society  in  this  respect.  And  after  all, 
this  evil  is  more  the  result  of  fashion  than  any 
thing  else.  A  lady  who  is  a  friend  to  temper- 
ance, brings  forward  wine,  not  because  she 
wishes  to  do  it,  or  wishes  to  partake  herself, 
but  because  such  is  the  fashion,  her  neighbors 
and  acquaintances  do  so,  and  she  wishes  to 
treat  them  as  well  as  they  treat  her.  And 
when  wine  is  brought  forward,  many  drink 
not  because  they  wish  to  drink,  but  because 
such  is  the  fashion.  You  can  then  do  some- 
thing, towards  changing  the  fashions,  by  dis- 
carding wine  from  your  own  parties. 

But,  it  may  be,  that  you  will  say,  that  you 
see  no  impropriety  in  offering  wine,  provided 
other  drinks,  as  water  or  lemonade,  are  offered 
too.  I  will  not  contend  about  what  may 
seem  unimportant,  I  will  only  say  that,  with 
the  views  which  I  now  entertain,  I  could  not 
offer  wine  to  a  social  company.  Still  every 
man  is  master  of  his  own  house,  and  every 
lady  must  preside  at  her  own  entertainment. 
It  is  a  question  for  each  individual  to  settle  on 
his  or  her  own  responsibility.  And  it  be- 


236  TOUNQ  LADY'S  AIB. 

comes  every  individual  to  be  well  assured  in 
the  course  which  may  be  pursued.  But  I 
would  insist  upon  it,  that  the  same  politeness, 
which  would  prompt  you,  out  of  regard  to 
past  practices  and  old  prejudices,  to  bring  for- 
ward wine,  should,  out  of  regard  to  the  con- 
scientious scruples  and  new  prejudices  of  ma- 
ny, prompt  you  to  bring  forward  other  and 
safer  drinks. 

Then,  when  you  attend  the  social  parties 
of  your  friends,  you  can  resolutely  decline  the 
proffered  glass  of  wine.  And,  when  among 
your  young  companions  and  acquaintances  of 
the  other  sex,  you  can  speak  decidedly 
against  the  practice,  and  express  your  strong 
disapprobation  of  the  evil,  in  every  form,shape 
or  degree.  In  these,  and  in  a  great  variety 
of  other  similar  ways,  you  may,  without  over- 
stepping the  modesty  of  your  nature,  do  much 
for  the  promotion  of  temperance.  Do  you  ask 
still  farther  in  regard  to  joining  temperance 
societies  ?  I  answer  that  these  societies  in 
many  respects,  differ  from  Moral  Reform  So- 
cieties. They  refer  not  to  practices  which 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  237 

are  shut  out  from  respectable  society,  but  to 
those  which  are  fashionable.  Not  to  the 
practices  of  others  but  to  your  own.  It  may 
be  inexpedient  and  improper  for  individuals 
to  associate  together  to  reform  their  neighbors, 
while  at  the  same  time  it  may  be  expedient 
and  proper  to  associate  together,  for  the  ref- 
ormation of  their  own  practices.  It  may  be 
inexpedient  to  ferret  out  and  bring  to  light  all 
the  arts  and  avenues  of  a  species  of  iniquity 
of  which  they  know  nothing,  and  the  very 
knowledge  of  which  is  dangerous,  while  at  the 
same  time  it  may  be  proper  to  investigate  and 
expose  the  secret  approaches,  the  debasing 
nature  and  the  fatal  consequences  of  any  prac- 
tice or  habit  to  which  they  are  themselves 
subjected,  and  of  the  nature  and  influence  o( 
which  they  are  ignorant.  There  is,  there- 
fore* as  I  conceive,  no  improprieiy  in  the  for- 
mation offemale  temperance  societies.  And 
there  have  been  times — there  may  now  be 
places  where  these  are  all  important — in  or- 
der that  the  ladies  may  strengthen  each  oth- 
er's hands,  and  encourage  each  other's  hearts 


238  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

— that  by  combination  and  associated  ef- 
fort, the  fashions  of  female  society  may 
be  changed.  But  I  have  learned  to  look  at 
things,  rather  than  at  names  and  forms,  and 
to  feel  the  importance  of  correct  principles 
rather  than  any  particular  modes  of  manifest- 
ing and  avowing  those  principles.  For  I 
have  found  that  generally  whore  correct  prin- 
ciples are  embraced,  they  will  manifest  them- 
selves in  some  way,  and  generally  if  accom- 
panied by  good  sense  and  sound  discretion, 
they  will  manifest  themselves  in  the  way  best 
adapted  to  the  peculiar  circumstances  of  the 
individual.  While,  therefore,  I  would  earn- 
estly entreat  every  young  lady  who  may  read 
these  pages,  to  be  open,  decided  and  uncom- 
promising in  her  opposition  to  every  form, 
shape  or  avenue  of  intemperance,  I  would  say 
in  regard  to  joining  a  temperance  society,  act 
just  as  in  the  exercise  of  a  sound  judgment, 
you  may  at  the  time  think  best. 

Do  you  ask  what  you  shall  do  about  sign- 
ing petitions  to  the  legislative  authorities  in 
regard  to  laws  upon  the  subject  ?  I  answer 
that  I  think  this  a  peculiar  subject  and  one 


FEMALE     INFLUENCE.  239 

very  different  from  others,  upon  which  peti- 
tions have  been  presented.  You  petition  in 
this  case  for  the  removal  of  evils,  and  the 
sources  of  evil  which  relate  directly,  to  your- 
selves— to  your  social  condition  and  to  your 
individual  happiness.  Your  fathers,  or  broth- 
ers may  be  intemperate,  and  may  in  their  in- 
temperance abuse  you.  Here  are  visible, 
palpable  evils  and  injuries  from  exposure  to 
which  you  ask  to  be  relieved.  These  are 
eviU  and  injuries  of  which  the  laws  take  cog- 
nizance. The  sources  of  these  evils  are  open 
and  known.  They  are  kept  open  and  made 
known  by  the  power  of  existing  laws.  I  see 
then,  no  impropriety  in  asking  the  law  mak- 
ing authorities  to  relieve  you  from  your  evils, 
from  your  exposure  to  these  evils,  to  close  the 
sources  of  evil,  which,  with  the  best  inten- 
tions they  have  already  undertaken  to  regulate. 
I  say  then,  there  is  no  impropriety  in  signing 
)etitions  on  this  subject.  1  have  some  doubts 
regard  to  the  expediency  of  so  doing.  This 
81  subject,  upon  which  the  roost  powerful 
gads  in  the  community  are  awakened,  in  re- 


240  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

gard  to  which  they  are  thinking  and  contriving 
what  may  be  the  best  to  be  done.  Unless 
therefore,  you  can  throw  new  light  before 
such  minds,  I  know  not  that  much  good  will 
result  from  such  petitions.  Still  further,  it 
depends  on  public  opinion  whether  whatever 
laws  may  be  enacted  upon  the  subject  shall 
be  enforced.  But  public  opinion  in  this  case 
means  the  opinions  of  the  male  portions  of 
the  community,  those  on  whom  it  falls  to  car- 
ry  forward  and  execute  the  laws  of  the  land. 
Should  there  be  change  of  laws  in  compliance 
with  the  petitions  of  ladies,  it  might  be  that 
public  opinion  in  the  sense  here  used  would 
not  sustain  the  charge.  I  have  therefore 
doubted  whether  much  good  could  result  from 
these  petitions  and  have  felt  that,  perhaps  it 
might  be  better  for  ladies  not  to  turn  their  at- 
tention so  much  to  these,  but  to  direct  it  more 
entirely  to  their  own  private  and  social  influ- 
ence in  their  appropriate  circle. 

Do  you  ask  what  you  shall  do  in  regard  ^n 
the  question  of  slavery,  and  abolition  soc;er 
ties?  I  answer,  that  I  conceive  the  quest506 


FEMALE    1NFLUKNCK.  241 

of  slaver}'  to  be  one  of  the  most  important 
questions  of  the  day,  a  question,  which  re- 
quires great  care  in  the  examination,  and  great 
caution  in  drawing  conclusions,  I  conceive  it 
to  be  important  that  all  young  ladies,  who 
have  the  opportunity,  should  make  them- 
selves acquainted  with  this  question,  and 
should  endeavor  to  understand  it,  in  its  va- 
rious bearings.  This  I  say  is  a  proper  and 
important  subject  of  reading,  thought  and  in- 
quiry. Like  all  other  important  moral  ques- 
tions, the  examination  of  this,  will  promote 
your  own  intellectual  and  moral  improvement. 
You  will,  as  you  examine,  read  and  reflect, 
find  the  various  principles  of  moral  duty  be- 
coming more  clearly  defined  to  your  own 
minds.  You  will  find,  too,  that  this  exercise 
of  your  mental  powers  will  increase  your 
strength  of  mind,  and  will  give  you  a  power 
to  grasp  and  comprehend  difficult  and  impor- 
tant subjects  of  moral  duty,  while  you  will  be 
acquiring  a  power  to  weigh  and  balance  prob- 
abilities, a  power  of  nice  discrimination  in  re- 
gard to  things  which  appear  to  be  alike,  but 
21 


242  TOUNO  LADT'S  AID. 

which  are  in  reality  widely  different.  And, 
when  young  ladies  have  once  made  up  their 
minds  upon  this  subject,  I  conceive  it  to  be 
proper  for  them,  within  their  appropriate 
sphere  to  express  their  opinions,  and  to  do 
what  may  be  in  their  power,  to  aid  others  to 
form  a  right  judgement,  while,  at  the  same 
time,  the  mind  should  be  kept  open  to  fur- 
ther light,  come  from  what  source  it  may. 
Thus  far  I  would  have  ladies  go  in  regard  to 
this  question.  Bat  I  would  not  have  them 
take  an  active  part  in  forming  aholition  Socie- 
ties and  presenting  abolition  petitions. 

Do  you  ask  me  the  reason  for  this  opinion? 
I  answer  that  abolition  societies  are  not  like 
temperance  societies,  formed  for  the  purpose 
of  correcting  evils  among  yourselves.  They 
relate  to  the  practices  of  others  and  those  ai 
a  distance  from  you.  Suppose  the  ladies  of 
the  south,  should  form  associations  for  the 
p-urpose  of  embodying  and  expressing  their 
decided  disapprobation  of  some  of  your  own/ 
practices. 

Would  you  expect  any  good  results  ?  Most 


FKMALK    INFLUENCE.  243 

surely  not.  I  am  aware  it  is  said  that  the 
state  of  opinion  and  feeling  upon  this  subject, 
are  wrong  even  at  the  north.  They  may  be 
so.  But  there  is  a  very  great  difference  be- 
tween the  reformation  of  fashions  and  the 
change  of  opinions.  If  fashions  are  to  be 
changed,  it  requires  the  combination  either 
tacitly  or  distinctly  formed  of  sufficient  num- 
bers to  give  a  sanction  to  new  fashions.  Bur 
if  opinions  are  to  be  changed,  there  should  be 
calm  argument  and  conclusive  reasoning.  A 
lady  may  with  propriety  discard  alcoholic 
drinks  from  her  entertainments,  because  the 
fashions  of  society  no  lonaer  require  them. — 
because  the  majority  of  those  with  whom  she 
associates,  no  longer  introduce  them.  But 
no  lady  of  mind  and  reflection,  will  change 
her  opinions  upon  a  question  like  that  of  sla- 
very, unless  she  is  herself  convinced  that  they 
are  wrong.  She  will  not,  she  ought  not  to 
change  them,  because  it  is  becoming  fashiona- 
ble to  be  on  the  other  side.  She  will  not, 
she  ought  not  to  change  them,  if  every  lady 
of  her  acquaintance  has  changed  them,  unless 


244  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

she  is  herself  convinced.  It  is  for  this  reas- 
on that  I  have  said,  examine  the  subject  care- 
fully and  calmly,  each  one  of  you  for  your- 
selves. Make  up  your  own  minds  deliber- 
ately, without  regard  to  the  opinions  of  oth- 
ers— but  upon  your  responsibility  to  your 
conscience  and  your  God.  It  is  for  this 
reason  that  I  have  said,  exert  your  influence 
in  favor  of  your  views,  decidedly  and  consis- 
tently, in  your  appropriate  sphere.  You 
ought  not  to  wish  others  to  be  influenced  in 
any  way  differently  from  that  in  which  you 
have  been  influenced.  You  ought  not  to 
wish  them  to  change  their  opinions  because 
you  have  changed  yours,  unless  their  minds 
are  convinced  and  satisfied,  by  the  reasons 
which  have  convinced  and  satisfied  yours. — 
And  therefore  your  proper  course  should  be 
to  converse  and  reason  upon  the  subject,  to 
write  upon  it  for  the  public,  if  you  are  quali- 
fied and  have  time,  to  present  facts  and  ar- 
guments. 

It   is  for  the   reason   above   stated,  that  I 
would  not  have  you  unite  in  forming  societies 


FEMALE    INFLUENUE.  245 

merely  for  the  purpose  of  making  one  opinion 
more  fashionable  than  another.  On  the 
whole  then,  I  should  much  question  the  pro- 
priety of  female  abolition  societies.  Ladies 
have  a  right  to  form  such  societies,  but  I 
should  question  whether  it  be  right  and  proper 
for  them  to  do  so.  I  should  think  they  might 
by  pursuing  a  different  course,  exert  a  more 
powerful  and  a  more  salutary  influence,  even 
in  favor  of  the  very  cause  which  they  have 
espoused. 

And  then  as  to  petitions  for  the  abolition  of 
slavery,  you  do  not,  in  these  petitions,  throw 
any  new  light  upon  the  subject.  You  only 
make  know  your  own  urgent  desires  upon  the 
subject.  But  it  is  a  subject  which  involves 
great  difficulties.  Those  who  are  called  to 
legislate,  are  bound  to  examine  these  diffi- 
culties. They  are  in  duty  bound  net  to  leg- 
islate, until  they  can  see  their  way  clear  to  do 
it  without  producing  more  hurt  than  good, 
until  their  are  satisfied  in  their  own  minds,  up- 
on the  subject.  Should  they,  out  of  regard 

to  your  petitions,  legislate,  and  so  involve  the 
21* 


246  YOUNG  LADYTS  AID. 

country  in  difficulty,  they  could  not  call  upon 
you,  upon  the  ladies,  to  extricate  the  country 
from  that  difficulty.  I  place  myself,  in  im- 
agination, in  the  situation  of  an  honest  and 
conscientious  legislator.  I  receive  petitions 
from  the  ladies  of  the  district  I  represent. 
These  petitions  contain  no  new  argtiments,no 
new  light.  They  only  make  known  to  me 
the  opinions  and  feelings  of  these  ladies,  and 
it  may  be  their  feverish  anxiety  that  something 
should  be  done.  I  feel  disposed  to  do  all  in 
my  power  to  comply  with  their  petitions. 
But  from  the  position  in  which  I  am  placed, 
I  am  compelled  to  look  at  the  subject  from 
a  different  point  of  view  from  what  they  have. 
And  I  can  see  no  way  of  accomplishing  the 
object  without  involving  the  country  in  great 
evils.  What  then,  as  an  honest  and  consci- 
entious man,  must  I  do  ?  You  cannot  wish 
me  to  act  contrary  to  my  own  convictions. 
And  what  good  therefore,  have  your  petitions 
done?  I  should  say  then,  here  as  before, 
exert  your  influence  by  endeavoring  to  spread 
right  views,  and  excite  right  feelings  upon 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  247 

the  subject  in  those  around  you.  And  pray 
that  these  right  views  and  feelings  may  pre- 
vail. But  refrain  from  these  petitions. 

I  have  thus,  my  friends,  spoken  plainly  and 
distinctly  in  regard  to  some  of  the  great  agi- 
tating questions  of  the  present  day — and  I 
would  commend  my  suggestions  to  your  care- 
ful consideration. 

But  there  are  other  opportunities  for  female 
influence  yet  to  be  noticed  There  is,  per- 
haps, no  one  place,  where  females  can  do 
more  good,  than  by  their  kind  attentions  to 
the  sick,  the  poor  and  the  suffering.  Every 
one,  who  has  been  prostrated  upon  a  bed  of 
sickness,  can  tell  of  the  soothing  influence  of 
female  attendance.  There  is  a  softness  and 
a  delicacy  in  their  attentions,  peculiarly  sooth- 
ing to  the  pains,  and  the  nervousness  of  a 
sick  bed,  which  man,  from  his  rougher  hab- 
its, does  not  usually  acquire.  I  know  (hat  some 
ladies  either  affect  a  nervousness  which  unfits 
them  for  these  duties,  or  are  really  incapaci- 
tated, from  their  peculiar  temperament,  for 
enduring  the  sight  of  suffering.  If  this  is  af- 


248  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

fected,  it  should  be  at  once  banished,  as  un- 
worthy ofa  rational  and  intelligent  soul.  If 
it  is  natural  and  real,  it  should  be  struggled 
against  and  overcome.  1  would  then  urge 
upon  all  young  ladies  to  avail  themselves  of 
all  opportunities,  which  are  not  inconsistent 
with  other  and  more  immediate,  or  more 
pressing  duties,  to  become  ministering  angels 
of  mercy  to  the  sick  and  the  suffering. — 
Wherever  it  can  be  done,  visiting  the  poor  is 
an  appropriate  way  of  female  influence  Fe- 
males can,  more  readily  than  men,  enter  into 
the  feelings,  and  secure  the  confidence  of  the 
poor.  The  poor  will  more  readily  lay  open 
their  wants  to  ladies  than  gentlemen,  and  the 
attentions  of  ladies  are  more  winning.  If 
time  and  other  circumstances  will  permit 
their  employing  themselves  in  making  gar- 
ments for  the  poor,  it  is  highly  proper  that 
they  should  do  so.  We  find  that  Dorcas  is 
spoken  of  in  the  scriptures,  in  terms  of  ap- 
probation, because  she  had  employed  her- 
self in  this  way.  And,  the  forming  of  asso- 
piations  for  purposes  like  this,  may  be  well. 


FEMALE    INFLUENCE.  249 

It  is  not  a  combination  for  the  removal  of 
public  evils,  it  is  an  association  to  promote 
strength  and  efficiency,  and  to  secure  wisdom 
and  counsel  in  the  alleviation  of  social  evils 
and  domestic  wretchedness.  And  you  will 
remember  the  social  and  the  domestic  are  the 
appropriate  spheres  of  woman's  influence. 

Still  further,  the  education  of  the  young, 
especially  in  its  earliest  stages,  is,  usually, 
and  probably  ever  will  be,  committed  to  fe- 
males. It  is  to  the  care  of  the  mother,  that 
the  earliest  training  of  the  child  is  first  com- 
mitted. An  elder  daughter  and  sister  may 
qualify  herself  for  the  assistance  of  the  moth- 
er and  may  do  much,  by  a  kind  influence, 
to  allay  the  passions,  to  form  the  dispositions 
to  guide  the  inquiries  of  younger  brothers  and 
sisters.  So  too,  any  young  lady,  who  may 
be  residing  in  the  family,  where  there  are 
children,  while  she  should  not  counteract  or 
thwart  the  plans  of  parents,  even  if  they  may 
seem  to  her  defective,  or  decline  her  aid  in 
carrying  them  forward,  may,  by  falling  in  with 
them  do  much  good.  And  by  free  conversa- 


250  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

tion  with  parents,  when  the  children  are  not 
present,  she  may  do  much  to  enlighten  their 
minds,  and  improve  and  elevate  their  plans, 
provided  she  has  herself  read,  and  reflected 
upon  the  subject.  In  addition  to  all  these 
quiet  and  unobtrusive  modes  of  influence, there 
are  thousands  of  young  ladies  wanted  to  sup- 
ply the  vacancies  in  our  earlier  schools.  And 
while  these  open  an  honorable  way  of  support, 
they  also  present  opportunities  for  the  exertion 
of  a  powerful  influence  for  good.  She  who 
avails  herself  of  them,  may  be  sustained  by 
the  thought  that  she  is  acting  within  her  ap- 
propriate sphere. 

Finally,  there  is  the  Sunday  School.  In 
that,  a  way  is  openeo  for  females  to  exert  a 
vast  amount  of  influence.  Just  look  at  this 
sphere.  Here  are  your  children  assembled 
around  you  for  a  time,  longer  or  shorter;  each 
week  you  have  their  uninterrupted  time,  and, 
if  successful,  you  may  secure  their  undivided 
attention  to  what  ?  to  the  highest  and  the  no- 
blest subjects  of  thought:  you  converse  with 
them  freely  about  the  holiest  themes,  about 


FEMAL*     INFLUENCE.  251 

God  and  the  Saviour,  and  about  religion  and 
happiness.  You  can  thus  guide  their  ener- 
gies, excite  and  direct  aright  their  childish 
curiosity.  You  can  impart  knowledge,  you 
can  impress  good  principles.  Oh,  it  is  a  glo- 
rious field  of  influence.  PSTor  is  it  so  limited 
as  you  may  suppose.  Should  the  number  of 
teachers  in  our  Sunday  Schools  increase  un- 
til there  are  not  more  than  one  or  two  schol- 
ars to  a  teacher,  it  would  be  a  happy  sight, 
provided  the  teachers  all  possesed  the  right  spir- 
it. The  instruction  may  be  more  particular, 
the  conversation  more  free,  the  attachment 
more  strong  and  the  influence  more  connec- 
ted and  powerful.  Would  that  every  young 
lady  might  find  it  convenient,  and  might  feel 
disposed  to  enter  upon  this  field  of  influence. 
But  if  it  is  a  field  of  influence,  it  is  also  a  sta- 
tion involving  responsibility.  And  while  I 
could  wish  that  every  young  lady  might  find 
it  convenient,  and  might  fe'el  disposed  to  en- 
gage in  this  work,  I  would  say,  lei  no  young 
lady  engage  in  it  unless  she  has  a  love  for 
spiritual  things,  a  desire  to  do  good,  a  wish  lo 


252  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

understand,  and  to  walk  according  to  the  great 
truths  which  she  is  to  teach,  unless  she  is 
willing  to  forego  some  gratifications  that  she 
may  attend  to  her  duties,  that  she  may  be 
present  at  the  meetings  of  teachers,  and  pur- 
sue the  studies  of  her  exercises.  For,  if  she 
engages  without  these  feelings,  the  task  will 
be  irksome,  and  her  influence  upon  her  class 
will  be  deleterious.  This  is  a  mode  of  influ- 
ence, which  is  to  occupy  more  than  the  allot- 
ted time,  of  school  on  the  Sabbath,  by  the 
reading  and  study  which  it  requires,  by  the 
meetings  of  teachers  for  social  and  mutual  im- 
provement, by  the  occasional  visits  to  pupils, 
which  are  important,  it  may  well  engross 
much  thought  and  occupy  much  leisure  time. 
And,  the  time  thus  spent,  is  profitably  spent, 
even  in  reference  to  one's  own  personal  im- 
provement. I  have  thus,  young  ladies,  point- 
ed out  various  ways  in  which  you  can  devote 
your  energies  to  the  advancement  of  truth  and 
goodness. 

And  now,  what    is  the  sum  of  the   whole 
matter  ?    The  proper  sphere  of  female  influ- 


FEMALE     INFLUENCE,  203 

•ence  is  in  private,  in  domestic  scenes  and  so- 
cial intercourse.  The  proper  way  of  exert- 
ing female  influence  is.,  by  the  cheerful  and 
faithful  discharge  of  appropriate  duties, 
rather  than  by  direct  efforts  in  *  public 
movements,  aimed  to  produce  visible  and 
striking  results.  These  are  the  principles 
which  I  have  laid  down,  I  have  endeavored 
to  show  their  justness,  to  carry  them  out  and 
apply  them  to  some  of  the  agitating  questions 
of  the  day.  I  have  also  endeavored  to  point 
out  ways  in  which  you  may  do  good,  in  ac- 
cordance with  these  principles.  I  believe, as 
I  have  said  before,  that  woman  can  exert  a 
powerful  influence  for  good,  if  she  will  con- 
fine her  efforts  to  her  appropriate  sphere. 
But,  i  fshe  steps  aside  from  this,  she  outrages 
the  general  sense  of  the  community,  excites 
disgust,  and  loses  the  influence  which  sh* 
might  otherwise  have  exerted, 


ADDITIONAL  LETTERS. 
No.  I. 

Young  ladies  urged  tc  prepare  while  young  for  future 
self  support — This  urged  on  the  ground  of  the  lia- 
bility to  a  change  of  pecuniary  circumstances — ou 
the  ground  of  the  independance  which  it  will  give 
in  fact  and  in  feeling — and  on  {he1  ground  of  the  good 
•moral  influence  which  such  an  effort  will  exert  upon 
.the  character — young  ladies  are  notadviaed  to  learn 
trades,  but  to  make  themselvss  acquainted  with  the 
whole  round  of  ordinary  domestic  female  labors — 
to  make  themselves  thoroughly  acquainted  with  all 
branches  of  study  to  which  they  may  attend,  and 
•whhu.all<the  accomplishments  which  they  may  ac- 
quire so  as  to  be  able  to  teach. 

MY  YOUNG  .FBIENDS: 

Since  the  first  edition  of  the  Young  Lady's 
Aid  was  published,  I  have  wished  that  I  had 
addressed  you  upon  two  separate  topics,  not 
there  distinctly  dwelt  upon.  The  printing  of 
a  second  edition  affords  me  the  desired  oppor- 
tunity >  of  which  I  gladly  avail  ^myself.  And 
[first,  I  wish  to  urge  open  you  the  importance 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  255 

of  making  distinct  and  careful  preparation, 
now  while  you  are  young,  to  support  your- 
selves, by  your  own  efforts,  should  you  be 
compelled,  by  any  emergency  in  after  life,  so 
to  do.  This,,  some  will  perhaps  say,  is  a 

topic,  which  it  is  extremely  important  should 
be  urged  upon  the  attention  of  some  of  those, 
for  example,  who  are  born  in  poverty,  or  in 
moderate  circumstances,  and  who  may  be 
compelled,  by  their  very  situation,  to  depend 
upon  their  own  efforts  for  a  support.  But  it 
is  a  strange  topic,,  you  may  think,  to  urge  up- 
on the  attention  of  the  daughters  of  the  wealthy 
of  our  land.  And  yet  to  me  it  seems  impor- 
tant that  this  subject  should  be  urged  upon  the 
attention  of  every  young  lady,  and  especially 
upon  the  attention  of  those  who  are  born  and 
reared  in  the  mansions  of  the  rich.  For  it  is 
by  them  that  it  will  in  all  probability  be  over- 
looked or  neglected,  while  those  in  more 
moderate  and  straitened  circumstances  will 
have  the  subject  urged  upon  their  attention; 
by  their  very  situation, 


TOCNS  LADYS  AID. 


In  this  country,  there  is  no  stability  to 
property.  It  is  ever  fluctuating,  like  the 
waves  of  the  troubled  sea.  Families,  that 
are  one  day  rolling  in  wealth,  are  the  next 
plunged  to  the  very  depths  of  poverty.  — 
Your  father  may  now  be  worth  his  thousands 
or  his  hundreds  of  thousands,and  may  be  able 
to  maintain  you  in  idleness,  or  in  the  neglect 
of  all  useful  employments,  and  to  furnish  you 
with  every  possible  indulgence.  But  though 
such  may  be  his  condition  to-day,  yet  you 
know  not  how  soon  he  may  meet  with  a  re- 
verse of  fortune.  Others,  who  were  once  as 
rich  and  who  thought  themselves  as  safe  as  he 
can  be,  are  now  among  the  poorest  of  the 
poor.  His  mountain  stands  no  firmer  than  did 
theirs.  His  riches  may,  as  theirs  have  already 
done,  take  to  themselves  wings  and  fly  away. 
Should  this  be  the  case,  what  will  be  your 
condition  if  destitute  of  the  means  of  self-sup- 
port ?  You  will  become  a  burden  upon 
your  friends,  and,  if  possessed  of  any  sensi- 
bility of  heart,  you  will  be  most  wretched  in 
yourself.  Instead  o(  being  able  to  cheer  and 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  257 

relieve  your  parents  by  your  efforts^  you  will' 
only  add  tenfold   to  their  misery  by  the  spec- 
tacle which  you  present,  of  one  wretched   in 
yourself  and  useless  too,  or  perhaps  a  burden 
upon  others.     Will  not  the   very  thought  of 
this  possible  contingency,  rendered'  vivid  and 
controling  by  your  affection  for  your  parents, 
prompt  you  to   secure,  now  while   you    are 
young,  the  power  and  the   means  of  self-sup- 
port ?     Again,  should  you  become  connected, 
in  the  holy  bonds  of  matrimony,  with  an  intel- 
ligent and"  industrious  man  of  business,  who- 
has  already  secured  a  competency,   and'  who. 
is    pressing   resolutely  forward     to   the*  at- 
tainment of  wealth,  still  you  know  the-  risks 
and  hazards  of  business.     How  ofteni  are  our 
.most  active  and  enterprising  men   disappoint- 
ed in  their  plans,  and  expectations?     How  of- 
ten are  they  brought  into  perplexing  and  temp- 
ling embarrassments  ?     Suppose  that,   under 
such  circumstances,  he   sees  in-  you,  the  wife 
of  his  love,  one  without  the  power  or  means 
of  self-support,  and' one,  who  will,  of  course, 
train  up  your  daughters  in  the  same    helpless 
22* 


358  rouxa  LADY'S  AID. 

ness.  How  will  this  add  to  his  anxiety  and 
embarrassment?  It  may  perhaps  drive  him 
to  despair,  and  cause  him  to  resort  to  the 
cup  of  intemperance  to  drown  his  cares.  It 
may  be,  then,  that  notwithstanding  your  ardent 
love  for  him,  your  unreserved  devotion  to 
him,  you  will,  simply  on  account  of  your  help- 
lessness, your  destitution  of  the  power  and 
the  means  of  self-support,  be  the  instrument 
of  completing  his  ruin,  or  converting  his  pe- 
cuniary into  moral  bankruptcy  and  of  sending 
him  to  the  drunkard's  grave.  But  if,  on  the 
contrary,  under  the  circumstances  supposed, 
your  husband  sees  you  capable  of  aiding  and 
assisting  in  the  struggle,  able  and  willing 
to  labor  for  your  own  support,  and  to  con- 
tribute to  the  support  of  the  family,  how  will 
he  be  cheered  and  sustained  ?  How  much 
more  resolutely  and  perserveringly  will  he 
himself  struggle,  how  much  will  his  moral 
character  be  improved,  and  his  happiness,  in 
union  with  your  own  increased.  He  may  be- 
come poor.  But  your  love  for  and  devotion 
|o  each  other,  will  be  increased  as  you 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  259 

gle  togeiher  and  assist  each  other.  I  would 
ask  any  young  lady,  who  may  read  these  pa- 
ges to  contemplate  the  different  pictures  I 
have  here  presented,  and  to  say  if  there  be  not 
sufficient  inducement,  in  the  possible  contin- 
gency suggested,  to  lead  her  to  seek,  now 
while  she  is  young  for  the  means  of  self-sup- 
port. 

But  there  are  other  reasons,  which  it  is  im- 
portant should  be  mentioned  in  this  connec- 
tion. The  consciousness  that  you  are  capa- 
ble of  self-support  renders  you  independent 
in  fact  and  in  feeling.  Should  you  be  redu- 
ced to  poverty,  in  regard  to  outward  posses- 
sions, still  you  will  have  a  fund  of  wealth 
within  yourselves,  in  your  own  well-trained 
and  well-exercised  powers.  You  will  not  be 
reduced  to  the  unpleasant  necessity  of  casting 
yourselves,  as  burdens,  upon  the  bounty  and 
charity  of  friends.  Wherever  you  may  be, 
you  will  be  able  to  render  an  equivalent  for 
what  you  receive.  Instead  of  seeking  chari- 
ty, your  services  will  be  sought.  You  will 
in  fact  be  independent.  And  this  is  an  impor- 


26*0  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

rant  consideration  in    another  point  of  view". 
It  is  often  the  case  that  young   ladies,    who" 
are  dependant  upon  others,  are  induced  to  ac- 
cept offers  of  marriage,  which  they  would  not 
under  other  circumstances,    regard    with  fa- 
vor.    Being  without  a  home,  they  are  will- 
ing, or  at  least  are  strongly   tempted,    to  run 
risks  in  regard  to  the  character  of  him,  who> 
may  offer  himself,  in  order  to  secure  a  home, 
which  under  other  circumstances  they  would 
avoid.     The    marriage   relation    is    one,    in 
which,  if  the  parties  are  well'  matched    and 
conduct  towards  each  other  upon  proper  prin- 
eiples,there  may  be  as  much  happiness  as  any 
earthly  relation  can  he   expected    to  afford. 
But  it  is  a  relation,  which  is  formed  for   life, 
for  better  or  for  worse,   and'  a  relation   too, 
which,  if  the  parties  are  not  well  matched,  or 
do  not  conduct  themselves  towards  each  oth- 
er in  a  proper  manner,  is  productive  of  more 
misery,  than  perhaps  any   other  relation    on 
earth.     It  is  important,  therefore,  that   there 
should  be  great  caution  in  entering  upon  such 
a  relation.     When  a  young  lady   receives  an 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  261 

offer,  there  are  many  very  solemn  considera- 
tions to  be  carefully  taken  into  account,  be- 
fore it  is  accepted.  What  is  the  character 
of  the  young  man  in  regard  to  energy — enter- 
prise and  industry  ?  Is  he  one  who  bids  fair 
to  be  able  to  support  all  the  expenses  of  a 
family  ?  What  are  his  habits  ?  Is  he  a 
gambler  or  inclined  to  the  vice  of  gambling — 
a  vice  which  not  only  leads  to  pecuniary  ruin, 
but  which  hardens  the  heart  and  destroys  the 
most  ardent  love  ?  Is  he  an  idler,  inclined  lo 
neglect  his  business,  and  spend  his  time  in 
lounging,  exposed  to  temptation  and  liable  to 
fall  a  victim  to  intemperance  and  other  pros- 
trating vices  ?  Wrhat  is  his  disposition,  on 
which  much  of  the  happiness  of  the  wife  must 
ever  depend  ?  What  are  his  principles  ? 
Are  they  loose  and  unsettled,  or  are  they 
fixed  and  decidedly  moral  and  religious  ? 
These,  and  a  great  variey  of  other  similar 
questions,  are  to  be  taken  into  consideration 
and  carefully  weighed  before  accepting  his 
offer.  For,  should  the  young  man  be  defi- 
cient in  these  respects,  it  will  be  much  better 


262 


for  the  young  lady  to  remain,  even  to  the  end 
of  life,  unmarried,  than  to  be  connected  with, 
him,  in  the  close  and  lasting  bonds- of  matri- 
mony. But,  that  a  young  lady  may  be  able 
to  take  these  questions  into  careful  considera- 
tion, she  should  be  in  some  degree  indepen- 
dent. If  not,  if  destitute  of  the  means  and 
the  power  of  self-support,  and  earnestly  de- 
siring a  home  and  a  competency,  she  will  be 
strongly  tempted,  to  say  the  least,  to  run 
great  risks.  But,  if  she  possesses  the 
means  and  the  power  of  self-support  in  her 
own  well-trained  and  well-developed  ener- 
gies,, she  will  be-  in  fact  independent  of  the 
necessity  of  throwing  herself  away,  upon  any 
worthless  character,  that  may  offer.  As  then, 
my  young  friends,  I  would  see  you  cautious 
in  forming  the  marriage  relation,  that  so  you 
may  derive  from  it  the  happiness,  which,  un- 
der the  most  favorable  circumstances,  it  is 
calculated  to  afford,  I  would  urge  you  now 
that  you  are  young,  to  prepare  to  support 
yourselves  by  your  own  efforts,  Then  will 
you.  be  independent  in  fact,  or  as  much  so.  aa 


ADBITIONAL    LETTERS. 

'we  can  any  of  us  be  in  this  world.  Still  fur- 
ther you  will  be  independent  .in  feeling.  If 
poor — if  single — you  will  still  feel  indepen- 
dent. You  will  not  feel  like  cringing  and 
creeping  through  the  world,  unable  to  think 
or  to  speak  for  yourself,  ever  consulting  the 
whims, -that  you  may  please  the  fancy  and  se- 
cure the  assistance  of  those  around  you. 
There  is  no  circumstance  which  presents  a 
greater  obstacle  to  real  Christian  devotion  to 
truth  and  duty,  tl>an  this  feeling  of  depen- 
dence, which  arises  from  this  inability  to  sup- 
port one's  self.  Will  you  not  then,  by  now 
acquiring  the  power  of  self-support,  free  your- 
selves from  this  trying  and  dangerous  feeling 
of  dependence  upon  the  charities  and  conse- 
quently upon  the  whims  of  others? 

Finally  this  very  ^effort, . to  prepare  to  sup- 
port yourselves  by  your  own -labors,  will  ex- 
ert a  moral  influence  over  your  characters,  of 
the  purest  and  most  healthful  kind.  The 
young,  and  especially  young  ladies,  are  apt  to 
be  thoughtless  in  regard  to  the  contingences 
«nd  realities  of  life.  And  this  is  more  panic- 


264  YOUNG  LAUY'S  AID. 

ularly  the  case  with  those  young  ladies,  who 
are  reared  in  the  lap  of  wealth.  I  know  not 
why  it  is,  hut  it  is  true,  that  our  most  wealthy 
men,  will  often  train  up  their  sons  to  labor,  in 
some  way,  for  their  own  support.  Do  they 
send  their  sons  to  college,  it  is  that  they  may 
prepare  themselves,  by  their  knowledge  of 
some  profession,  for  self-support.  If  they  do 
not  send  them  to  college,  they  place  them  as 
clerks  in  some  mercantile  house,  that,  in  this 
way,  they  may  be  prepared  for  self-support. 
But  it  is  not  so  with  daughters.  They  seem 
to  be  often  regarded  as  useless  incumbrances 
upon  the  estate,  to  be  fitted  for  the  matrimo- 
nial market.  And  this  circumstance  operates 
to  render  them  more  thoughtless  in  regard  to 
the  possible  contingencies  and  sober  realities 
of  life,  than  they  otherwise  would  be.  How 
often  do  parents  even  in  wealthy  circumstan- 
ces, ask  "how  shall  we  fit  our  son  to  get  his 
own  living  ?"-— and  how  seldom  is  a  question 
like  this  asked  in  regard  to  daughters  ?  Now 
if  parents  would  pursue  an  opposite  course  of 
•Ireatment  towards  their  daughters,  would  im- 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  265 

-press  upon  them  the  uncertainty  of  earthly 
riches,  and  the  importance  of  preparing  to 
maintain  themselves,  what  an  effect  would 
their  conduct  have  upon  the  characters  of 
ithose  daughters,  in  allaying  their  vanity  and 
frivolity  and  thoughtlessnes-s,  and  in  awaken- 
ting  them  to  a  cairn  contemplation  of  the  pos- 
•sihle  contingences,  and  a  careful  preparation 
•to  meet -the  sober  realities  of  life  ?  But  it  is 
sometimes  the  case,  that  young  ladies  are 
•called  upon  to  be  true  to  themselves,  and  to 
remedy,  in  their  self-cultivation,  the  defects 
of  parental  training.  Suppose  then,  that  a 
young  lady  resolves,  that.,  notwithstanding  the 
wealth  of  her.  parents,  she  will  acquire  the 
power  of  sell-support,  what  will  be  the  effect 
of  acting  up  to  this  resolution  upon  her  char- 
acter ?  Will  it  not  keep  ever  before  her 
mind  the  thought  of  the  possible  contingences 
of  life?  Will  she  not  feel  that  the  continued 
enjoyment  of  wealth  is  uncertain  ?  And  will 
not  this  thought  check  all  pride  or  vanity, 
which,  under  other  circumstances,  might 
sprins;  up  in  her  heart,  on  account  of  the 
23 


266  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID,  . 

wealth  of  her  father  ?  Will  it  not  cause  her 
lo  see  that  worth  of  character — individual  en- 
ergy and  power  of  usefulness — amiable  dis- 
;pO5itions  and  unbending  principles,  constitute 
the  only  real  and  lasting  wealth  ?  Will  not 
this  resolution  cause  her  to  look  forward  to 
the  future  scenes  of  life,  not  merely  as  lo  an 
opportunity  for  display — not  merely  as  to 
a  scene  of  uninterrupted  enjoyment,  but  as  to 
a  field  for  the  discharge  of  duty — for  doing 
good  and  being  useful?  Will  not  such  a  res- 
olution, if  acted  upon,  infuse  ne\v  energy  into 
her  soul,  make  her  what,  \\iihout  it,  she 
could  not  have  become,  fill  her  \viih  self-res- 
pect, and  secure  for  her  the  respect  ol  all 
around  ?  Most  surely  such  will  tie  its  natu- 
ral influence  upon  the  character.  I  have 
thus,  my  young  friends,  urged  upon  your  at- 
tention the  importance  of  preparing  no\v  while 
you  are  young,  to  support  yourselves,  to  get 
your  own  living,  should  circumstances  ever 
require  it,  by  your  own  efforts.  I  have  urged 
this,  on  the  ground  of  the  liability  ton  change 
of  pecuniary  circumstances  in  your  father,  or 


ADDITIONAL    LETTLRS.  267 

your  future  husband,  should  you  be  married  ; 
on  the  ground  of  the  independence,  which  it 
will  give  you  in  fact  and  in  feeling,  raising  you 
above  a  thousand  unpleasant  circumstancesy 
and  keeping  you  from  a  thousand  dangerous- 
temptations;  on  the  groui.d  of  the  elevating 
and  ennobling  moral  influence,  which  such  an- 
effort  will  exert  over  your  own  characters. 
And  I  would  hope  that  which  I  have  written, 
will  not  be  dismissed  without  thought — as 
merely  an  odd  notion  of  one  who  knows  no- 
thing upon  the  subject.  It  is  not  so — I  do 
know.  I  have  seen  moral  weakness,  mental 
imbecility  and  utter  wretchedness,  resulting 
from  the  neglect  to  acquire  the  power  of  self- 
support.  1  wish  for  your  happiness — I  wish 
to  see  you  prepared  for  the  possible,  the  pro- 
bable contingencies  of  life.  I  wish  to  see 
you  forming  characters  marked  by  real  worth 
and  true  energy;  exhibited,  as  these  ever  will 
be,  in  connection  with  truefemenine  delicacy 
and  propriety.  It  is  for  this  reason  that  I 
have  written  these  pages  God  grant  that 
they  may  be  instrumental  of  the  good  and 


YOUNG  LADY  S  AID. 


happiness  of  those  to  whom  they  are  addressed.. 
And  now,  perhaps,  you  ask,  how  you  shall 
best  comply  with  the  counsels  which  I  have 
here  given  ?  You  may  ask,  if  I  am  about  to 
advise  all  young  ladies,  even  the  daughters 
of  the  most  wealthy,  to  learn  some  one  of 
the  arts  or  trades,  to  which  females  usually 
resort  for  support  ?  In  answer,  I  would  say, 
that  such  is  not  my  intention.  Should  you  do 
this,  and  then  be  reduced  to  poverty,  it  might 
be  the  case,  that  you  would  not  find  employ- 
ment in  the  particular  pursuit  which  you  had 
learned.  And  this  being  your  only  means  of 
support, you  would, under  such  circumstances, 
be  nearly  as  dependent  as  without  such  an 
art.  I  have  seen  young  ladies  in  tbis  situa- 
tion, with  the  knowledge  of  some  one  art,  in 
which  they  could  not  find  employment, and  not 
being  acquainted  with  the  common  routine  of 
female  labors,  they  were  useless  to  others  and 
unhappy  themselves,  still  dependant,  and  in 
the  circumstances  in  which  they  were  placed, 
without  the  means  of  s-elf-support.  I  do  not 
recommend,  as  a  general,  as  a  universal  thingr 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  269 

the  learning  of  any  of  the  trades  or  arts,  to 
which  females  usually  resort.  And  what,then, 
you  will  ask,  do  I  recommend?  I  answer, 
that  1  recommend  your  making  yourselves 
thoroughly  and  practically  acquainted  with 
the  whole  round  of  ordinary,  domestic  female 
duties  and  labors.  Let  there  be  no  part  of  do- 
mestic female  labor,with  which  you  are  not  ac- 
quainted. And  in  doing  this,  I  mean  some- 
thing more  than  merely  knowing  and  being 
able  to  tell  how  it  should  be  done.  1  mean 
practical  skill  in  doing  it.  It  may  be,  that, 
although  the  daughter  of  a  man  of  wealth,  you 
do  sometimes  enter  the  kitchen  to  see  how 
things  are  done  there,  and  learn  how  they 
should  he  done.  This  is  well,  but  it  is  not 
enough;  it  is  not  the  whole  of  what  I  mean. 
I  mean  that  you  should  take  hold  and  do  the 
tilings  which  belong  to  that  department  of 
household  duties,  until  you  acquire  a  practical 
skill  in  doing  them — so  that  withoutthe  direc- 
tion of  your  mother,  and  withoutthe  assistance 
of  domestics,  you  would  of  yourself  be  qual- 
ified to  keep  your  father's  house.  And  so 
23* 


270  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

too,  in  regard  to  the  use  of  the  needle,  and 
the  knitting  needles,  learn  all  their  various 
uses,  and  make  yourself  skilful  in  these  va- 
rious uses.  I  would  have  you  not  only  learn 
to  do  fine  work,  although  I  would  urge  you  to 
make  yourself  thoroughly  skilled  in  that,  but 
I  would  have  you  equally  well  skilled  in  the 
coarser  use  of  the  needle.  I  would  have  you 
understand  how  to  darn  and  patch  neatly,  as 
well  as  how  to  work  in  the  best  possible  man- 
ner, a  cape  or  a  collar.  These  are  both  im- 
portant parts  of  female  labor,  and  ought  both 
to  be  learned,  as  they  may  both  become,  in 
an  emergency,  the  means  of  her  support. — 
The  only  way  to  become  skilled  in  any  part  of 
female  labor,  is  to  practice,  and  to  continue  to 
practice  doing  it.  This  is  the  only  way  in 
which  you  make  yourself  practically  skilled  in 
any  accomplishment.  You  do  not  think  it 
enough  to  be  told  merely  by  your  music  mas- 
ter, how  to  touch  the  keys  of  your  piano, 
— you  practice,  over  and  over  again,  until 
you  become  skilled.  You  do  not  think  it 
enough  to  have  your  dancing  master  show 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  271 

you,  in  his  own  performance,  how  you  should 
dance.  This  might,  perhaps,  make  you  a 
critic,  upon  the  dancing  of  others.  But  to  be 
yourself  a  good  dancer,  you  must  practice, 
over  and  over  again.  So  you  should  not  think 
k  sufficient  to  be  told  by  your  mother,  how 
the  domestic  and  household  labors  should  be 
performed,  nor  yet  that  it  is  sufficient  to  see 
them  performed  by  domestics.  You  must 
perform  them  yourself,  over  and  over  again, 
if  you  would  be  skilled  in  their  performance. 
The  importance  of  this  kind  of  preparation, 
for  self-support,  you  will  perceive,  upon  a 
moment's  reflection.  Should  your  mother 
be  taken  from  you.  should  your  father  be  re- 
duced and  compelled  to  dismiss  his  domestics, 
you  can,  if  you  have  health,  lighten  his  bur- 
thens. For  you  can  not  only  preside  and  di- 
rect, but  you  can  actually  perform.  And  so 
too,  should  you,  in  the  married  state,  find  a 
difficulty,  as  many  married  ladies  do,  in  pro- 
curing good  domestics,  you  will  not  feel  de- 
pendent upon  them.  You  can  perform  the 
labors  of  your  own  family.  Should  you  have 


272  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

domestics,  you  can  not  only  direct,  but  you 
can  shew,  by  example,  how  things  should  be 
done.  And  then,  too,  having  actually  per- 
formed these  duties  and  labors  yourself,  you 
know  all  the  difficulty  of  their  performance, 
and  will,  on  that  account,  look  more  kindly 
upon  your  domestics.  Should  your  husband 
be  reduced,  you  can,  if  you  have  health,  dis- 
miss your  domestics,  for  you  are  yourself 
skilled  in  the  performance  of  domestic  duties, 
and  household  labors. 

And  then,  too,  should  it  happen  to  you  as 
it  sometimes  does  to  young  ladies,  reared  in 
the  lap  of  wealth  and  indulgence,  that  your 
father's  estate,  at  his  death,  is  insolvent,  and 
you  are  left  wholly  to  your  own  resources, 
you  will  find  a  welcome  in  almost  every 
family  you  may  enter.  Your  knowledge  is 
not  confined  to  one  branch  of  labor.  You  can 
turn  your  hand  to  any  labor  usually  needed  in 
a  family.  You  can  make  yourself  use- 
ful, wherever  you  are,  and  consequently 
you  will  never  want  a  home  or  friends.  And 
you  will  feel,  too,  wherever  you  are,  that  you 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  27S'« 

ate  not  a  burthen,  that  you  render  an  equiva- 
lent for  what  you  receive.  Such,  then,  is 
my  advice,  in  regard  to  the  work  of  the  hands. 
Make  yourselves,  my  young  friends,  thorough- 
ly and  practically  acquainted,  with  the  whole 
round  of  female  household  labors,  and  then 
if  you  cannot  find  employment  in  one  way, 
you  can  in  another.  Then  will  you  always 
find  a  welcome  and  a  home — then  may  you 
under  all  ordinary  circumstances,  feel  inde- 
pendent. 

But  I  have  other  advice,  in  regard  to  em- 
ployments of  the  mind.  In  acquiring  your 
education,  usually  so  called,  that  is,  in  your 
attendance  at  school,  and  upon  the  various 
studies  of  school,  keep  this  object  of  future 
self-support  in  view.  To  whatever  branch 
of  study  your  attention  may  be  directed,  be, 
thorough  in  that  study,  and  especially  in  the 
elementary  principles  of  that  branch.  You 
may  not  perhaps  pass  over  many  branches  of 
study.  Yet  if  you  are  thorough  in  the  ele- 
mentary principles  of  the  branches  you  do- 
study,  you  will  be  prepared  to  teach  in  them*. 


274  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

Suppose  for  example  you  have  an  opportunity 
of  attending  only  to  reading,  spelling  ana* 
writing.  Make  yourself  thoroughly  acquaint- 
ed with  the  elementary  principles  of  these 
branches.  Endeavor  to  understand  trie  ap- 
plication of  these  principles.  Endeavor  to 
understand  the  best  modes  of  communi- 
cating and  impressing  them.  And  then, 
if  you  go  no  farther,  you  will  be  qualified  for 
profitable  employment  in  teaching.  You  will 
be  qualified  to  do  much  of  that  part  of  teach- 
ing, which  ordinarily  devolves  upon  females. 
Now  I  am  fully  satisfied,  from  what  I  have 
seen,  that  many  young  ladies,  who  have  had 
great  advantages — who  have  received  what  is 
fashionably  termed  a  finished  education,  are 
not  qualified  to  teach  reading  and  spelling,  as 
they  should  be  taught.  I  have  named  the 
very  lowest  and  simplest  branches.  Suppose 
you  go  farther  and  study  Arithmetic,  Geog- 
raphy, Grammar,  Philosophy,  Astronomy, 
French.  Still  I  say  he  thorough  in  the  ele- 
mentary principles  of  these  studies,  and  tbet> 
should  your  reduced  circumstances  ever  here- 


ADDITIONAL,    LETTERS.  275 

after  render  it  necessary,  you  will  be  qualified 
to  teach  them,  and  thus  to  support  yourself  in 
an  honorable,  and  independent  manner. 

And  the  same  advice  would  1  give  in  re- 
gard to  accomplishments.  Should  you  have 
aii  opportunity  to  attend  to  Music  or  Paint- 
ing, and  find  that  you  have  a  taste  for  them, 
be  thorough  and  make  yourself  acquainted 
with  the  science,  the  principles  of  these  arts. 
Then  you  will  be  qualified  to  give  instruction 
in  them.  If  in  all  your  course  of  education 
you  will  comply  with  the  advice,  which  I 
have  here  given,  you  may  fit  yourselves  for 
many  pleasant  and  useful  employments, which 
will,  if  you  should  hereafter  need,  be  the 
means  of  an  honorable  self-support.  And 
what  adds  importance  to  this  advice,  is  that 
this  is  the  only  mode  of  acquiring  a  knowl- 
edge of  the  several  branches  of  education, 
which  will  render  them  as  useful  to  you  as 
they  are  capable  of  being  made.  The  thorough 
study  of  the  elements  of  different  branches  of 
education,  is  the  only  mode  of  pleasant  and 
profitable  study  even  without  any  regard  to 


2,16  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

•the  use  which  is  to  be  made  of   them  in  after 
life  by  way  of  teaching. 

Let  me  then,  my  young  friends,  urge  this 
subject  upon  your  attention,  as  one  of  the 
utmost  importance  to  your  present  best  im- 
provement, and  to  your  future  highest  happi- 
ness. Examine  the  different  points  of  my 
advice  again  and  again.,  and  :isk  if  they  be  not 
in  accordance  with  fact,  with  truth  and  with 
reason.  And  if  they  appear  to  your  minds  to 
be  so,  then  let  no  difficulty  in  the  way  deter 
you  from  making  the  effort  to  acquire,  now 
while  you  are  young,  the  power  of  future  self- 


ADDITIONAL  LETTER. 
No.   II. 


The  practice  of  joking  upon  the  subject  of  courtship 
and  marriage  very  common  among  ladies — It  de- 
grades the  character  of  those  who  indulge  in  it — 
It  destroys  or  mars  the  pleasure  and  profit  of  social 
intercourse — It  exerts  a  deleterious  influence  upon 
the  young — It  destroys  the  solemnity  and  impor- 
tance which  ought  always  to  be  attached  to  the 
subject  of  marriage — This  joking  prevails  some- 
times among  gentlemen  ;  but  it  has  its  rise  with 
ladies — if  they  will  break  up  the  practice  among 
themselves  it  Avill  not  prevail  in  the  community. 

MY  YOUNG  FRIENDS  : 

In  my  last  letter,  I  directed  your  attention 
to  the  importance  of  securing,  now  while  you 
are  young,  the  power  and  the  means  of  future 
self-support.  I  wish,  in  this,  to  say  a  few 
words  in  regard  to  a  practice,  in  which  young 
ladies,  and  indeed  ladies  of  all  ages,  are  prone 
to  indulge.  I  refer  to  the  practice  of  ever 
joking  upon  (he  subject  of  courtship  and  mar- 
24 


273  YOUNG  LADY'S  AI». 

riage.  It  is  a  fact,  that  among  ladies,  and 
•even  among  young  ladies,  there  is  a  propensi- 
ty to  be  continually  joking  upon  this  subject. 
A  young  gentleman  and  a  young  lady  can 
scarcely  treat  each  other  with  common  cour- 
tesy and  politeness,  but  ihe  lady  is  at  once, 
tormented  by  the  stale  jokes,  the  hackneyed 
witticisms,  the  oft  repeated  and  sometimes 
even  indelicate  allusions  of  her  female  acquain- 
tances. Is  a  lady  free  in  her  social  inter- 
course with  a  gentleman?  The  report  is 
quickly  started,  and  \videly  spread, ft) at  she  is 
seeking-  attentions,  has  fallen  in  love,  or  is 
actually  engaged.  This  I  say  is  the  fact,  and 
in  saying  this,  I  speak  only  of  what  I  have  seen 
and  known.  The  practice  may  prevail  to  a 
greater  degr-e-e  in  some  places  t,han  in  others. 
But  it  prevails  to  some  extent,  I  am  satisfied 
in  all  places.  I  have  known  parents  continu- 
ally joking  upon  this  subject,  and  that  too  in  a 
very  improper  .nwnner,  before  their  children. 
Nay  more,  I  have  known  them  continually 
joking  their  daughters  even,  from  early  youth, 
seeming  to  eo,nv.ey,  in  .their  jokes,  the  idea  that 


ADDITIONAL    LETTKKS. 

the  great  object  of  every  young  lady  should 
be  to  get  ma/ried,  and  that  a  female  can  be 
subjected  to  no  greater  disgrace,  than  that 
consequent  upon  living  single.  And  I  have 
felt  and  have  said  to  rnyselfr  as  I  have  witness- 
ed this,  should  these  parents  be  cursed  by  the 
imprudent  and  unhappy  marriages  of  their 
daughters,  they  must  regard  themselves  as- 
the  procuring  cause  of  their  sufferings.  When 
this  practice  becomes  an  inveterate  habit,  as  it 
often  does,  it  destroys  all  delicate  regard  for 
the  feelings  of  others,  and  even  the  sacred 
precints  of  hallowed  grief  are  not  free  from  its 
intrusions.  How  often  is  it  the  case,  when 
the  husband  or  the  wife  are  taken  away  by 
death,  that  the  whole  neighborhood  and  village 
gossrp  is  employed  in  discussing  a  suitable 
match  for  the  surviving  partner  ?  How  often 
b  it  the  case,  that  the  broken  heart  of  some 
mourning  widow  is  pierced  by  these  unfeel- 
ing and  indelicate  jokes  of  female  acquaintan- 
ces ? 

Such  my  friends  are  facts.     Shall  I  tell  you 
how  all  this  appears  to  the  eye  of  an  observ- 


280  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

er  ?  It  seems  as  if  the  one  engrossing  and  all- 
absorbing  object  of  thought  and  desire  with 
such  minds,  related  to  the  subject  of  mar- 
riage. They  may  be  well  informed  and  may 
engage  in  conversation  upon  some  intellectu- 
al topic.  But  how  readily  is  the  conversa- 
tion broken  off,  when  the  subject  of  courtship 
and  marriage,  of  love  affairs,  and  matrimonial 
engagements  is  introduced,  and  how  much 
more  freely  do  tongues  now  move — how  much 
brighter  do  eyes  now  sparkle — and  how  much 
greater  earnestness  in  listening  is  there  now, 
than  there  was  before.  You  conclude  that 
conversation  upon  other  subjects  is  forced, 
while  this  is  only  the  flowing  forth,in  words, of 
the  spontaneous  emotions  of  the  heart. 

Does  one  given  to  this  practice  of  joking, 
see  a  lady  and  a  gentleman  conversing  freely 
and  socially  ?  You  would  suppose,  from  her 
jokes  and  remarks,  that  it  had  never  entered 
her  conceptions  that  they  could  possibly  con- 
verse upon  other  subjects  than  love,  court- 
ship or  marriage.  And  even  ii  assured  that 
the  conversation  was  upon  an  altogether  dif- 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  281 

ferent  subject,  still  you  would  suppose,  from 
her  hints  and  insinuations,  that  she  could  not 
believe  it  possible,  that,  though  conversing 
upon  other  subjects,  their  thoughts  could  be 
upon  any  other  than  these.  Such  is  the  ap- 
pearance of  this  practice  in  the  eye  of  an  ob- 
server. I  can  assure  you  that  with  the  intelli- 
gent and  noble,  and  pure,  it  has  a  tendency  to 
degrade  the  character  of  those  who  indulge  in 
it — to  destroy  that  deep  and  heartfelt  respect, 
which  it  is  important  should  ever  be  cherish- 
ed for  female  character. 

But  this  is  a  practice,  which  not  only  de- 
grades you  in  the  eyes  of  intelligent  observers, 
it  is  productive  of  evil  consequences.  It  either 
utterly  destroys  or  greatly  mars  the  pleasure 
of  social  intercourse.  We  are  created  for  the 
society  of  each  other.  We  are  so  constituted 
that  we  love  each  others  society,  our  happi- 
ness is  increased  if  we  can  share  it  with  anoth- 
er— our  griefs  are  diminished  if  we  can  enjoy 
the  sympathy  of  others  in  the  midst  of  them. 
And  we  are  not  so  created,  that  our  social  in- 
tercourse is  not  to  be  confined  to  persons  of  the 
24* 


282  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

same  sex  with  ourselves.  Gentlemen  and 
ladies  enjoy  each  others  society,  even  in  those 
cases  where  there  is,  and  can  be,  no  thought 
of  love,  technically  so  called,  courtship  or 
marriage — and  they  are  improved  by  each 
other's  society.  They  are  probably  more  im- 
proved than  they  could  be,  were  they  to  con- 
fine all  their  social  intercourse  to  members  of 
their  own  sexes  respectively.  The  softness 
and  delicacy  and  refinement  of  woman's  con- 
versation exerts  a  salutary  influence  upon  the 
character  of  man.  Without  it, men  would  be 
in  danger  of  becoming  bears  in  their  manners 
and  in  theirintercourse  with  each  other.  And 
on  the  other  hand,  the  conversation  of  man 
exerts  a  favorable  influence  upon  the  charac- 
ter of  woman,  preventing  that  sickly  effemi- 
nacy which  would  otherwise  prevail.  Gen- 
tlemen and  ladies  then  are  made  for  society, 
for  social  intercourse  with  each  other.  But 
what  is  social  intercourse  ?  the  mere  pro- 
nouncing of  words  by  two  persons  in  the  form 
of  a  dialogue?  Most  surely  not.  Have  you 
never  witnessed  a  fashionable  morning  call  of 


ADDITIONAL,    LETTERS*. 

one  lady  upon  another,  made  because  the  ac- 
quaintance must  be  kept  up,  and  not  because 
the  ladies  feel  at  all  interested  in  each  other  ? 
There  w,ere  words  uttered  by  both,  and  that 
with  fluency  too.  But  has  there  been  social 
intercourse  ?  Most  surely  not.  To  consti- 
tute social  intercourse  there  must  be  a  free 
interchange  of  thought  and  feeling.  At  least 
this  interchange  of  thought  and  feeling  must 
be  free  from  all  restraints,  but  such  as  good 
sense  and  true  delicacy  would  impose.  When 
two  persons  meet  together,  if  they  would  en- 
joy the  highest  and  purest  pleasures  of  social 
intercourse,  they  should  be  able  to  express  to 
each  other  their  thoughts  and  their  feelings, 
their  doubts  and  their  enquiries  upon  the  vari- 
ous topics,  which  ni:iy  be  the  subjects  of  their 
conversation,  without  the  feeling  that  their 
freedom  will  subject  them  to  remark,  or  cause 
them  to  be  tormented  with  constant  and  an- 
noying jokes.  Still  further,  they  should  not 
feel  that  the  one  or  the  other  of  them  may 
draw  inferences  from  this  freedom  in  conver- 
sation of  an  improper  character.  There  may 


284  YOU.NO  LADY'S  AW. 

be — there  sometimes  is  intercourse  of  this 
character.  It  is  truly  pleasant,  truly  profitably. 
But  the  practice  of  which  I  am  speaking  de- 
stroys, in  a  great  degree,  all  this  pleasure,  and 
prevents  all  this  profit.  When  young  ladies  and 
gentlemen  feel  that  in  their  social  intercourse 
they  are  watched,  when  they  feel  that  any 
freedom  in  conversation  with  each  other,  will 
subject  them  to  reproaches  and  remarks,  they 
will  be  under  an  unpleasant  restraint,  their 
conversation  will  degenerate  into  stiff  and  cold 
and  distant  formality.  Or,  if  this  be  not  tho 
result,  the  gentleman,  having  heard  so  much 
of  this  joking,  and  not  knowing  but  the  lady 
he  converses  with  may  feel,  as  those,  who  in- 
dulge in  this  practice  of  joking,  seem  to  feel, 
that  all  freedom  in  conversation  on  the  part  of 
a  gentleman  with  a  lady,  must  mean  some- 
thing in  particular,  will  fear  that  she  may 
draw  improper  inferences  from  his  unrestrain- 
ed manner.  In  these  ways,  you  perceive, 
the  practice  of  which  I  am  speaking,  either 
entirely  destroys  or  greatly  mars,|all  the  pleas- 
ure and  profit  of  social  intercourse, 


ADDITIONAL    LETTERS.  285 

Again;  this  practice  exerts  an  injurious  in- 
fluence upon  the  young.  We  sometimes 
wonder  that  boys  and  girls  begin,  at  so  early 
an  age,  to  manifest  their  feelings  upon  this 
subject,  to  be  thinking  and  speaking  of  beaux 
and  sweat  hearts.  But  why  should  they  not? 
They  hear  this  from  those  older  than  them- 
selves, even  from  their  earliest  childhood. 
They  hear  it  from  the  young  gentlemen  and 
ladies  they  may  be  acquainted  with,  from 
their  older  brothers  and  sisters,  and  it  may  be 
even  from  their  parents.  They  see,  for  ex- 
ample, that  if  an  older  sister  seems  to  enjoy 
the  society  of  any  young  gentleman,  as  a 
friend,  she  is  at  once  joked  upon  the  subject, 
and  he  is  called  her  beau.  Why,  then,  when 
in  childish  simplicity,  they  enjoy  each  other's 
society,  boys  and  girls  together,  should  not 
the  example  which  has  been  set  before  them, 
be  followed — why  should  not  they  think  and 
speak  of  their  beaux  and  sweethearts.  Nay, 
more;  it  does  not  appear  to  me,  a  whit  more 
ridiculous  in  this  latter  case, than  in  the  case  of 
older  persons.  But  its  absurdity  in  either 


286  rOL'NG   LADV'S   AlO. 

ease  is  not  its  vrorst  feature;  it  exerts,  I  am 
satisfied,  and  especially  over  the  young,  a  del- 
eterious moral  influence. 

Still  further,  it  gives  rise  to  improper  feel- 
ings in  regard  to  the  relation  of  marriage.  It 
destroys,  in-  the  mind,  the  solemnity  a.nd  se- 
riousness with  which  this  subject  should  ever 
be  viewed,  and  causes  it  to  be  entered  upon 
in  the  most  thoughtless  and  inconsiderate 
manner.  The  marriage  relation  is  one  of  the 
most  important  in  society.  It  is  fraught  with 
consequences,  which  come  nearer  to  the  heart 
and  more  deeply  affect  the  character  and 
happiness,  than  the  consequences  of  any  oth- 
er relation.  Just  look  at  it.  Two  individu- 
als, of  different  tastes,  in  many  things,  of  dif- 
ferent habits^  and  of  different  feelings,  are 
brought  together  as  husband  and  wife,  sustain- 
ing to  each  other  a  relation  more  intimate  than 
any  other  which  exists  on  earth,  a  relation  in 
which  the  whole  happiness  of  the  one  party 
may  be  destroyed,  by  some  slight  indiscretion 
or  by  some  infelicity  of  temper  and  disposition 
in  the  other;  a  relation  in  which  one's  success 


ADDITIONAL    LKTTKItS.  587 

and  usefulness;  may  be  either  much  promo- 
led  or  much  retarded  by  the  influence  of  the 
oilier;  a  relation  in  which  one's  religious  im- 
provement and  preparation  for  heavenly  hap- 
piness, may  depend,  in  some  degree,  upon 
t'he  partner;  and  a  relation,  too,  it  is,  which 
is  formed  for  life.  Its  misery,  if  misery  be 
the  rosu'lt,  is  not  the  misery  of  a  day,  or  y 
week,  ;but  the  misery  of  a  life.  Its  influence 
for  good  or  for  evil,  will  bo  felt,  not  merely 
for  a  few  months,  or  for  a  few  years,  but  for 
life;  nay,  more;  its  influence  will  produce  re- 
sults upon  the  character  that  shall  outlast 
time,  and  ha  experienced  in  eternity.  Now 
is  such  a  relation,  the  relation  of  all  others,  to- 
be  made  the  subject  of  light  and  trifling,  and 
it  may  be,  of  vulgar  joking  ?  Is  such  a  rela- 
tion to  be  ever  'held  up  'be-fore  the  young,  as 
one  of  the  plays  of  life;  of  no  more  importance 
than  the  choosing  of  partners  for  a  cotillion? 
Oh,  no.  When  you  reflect,  young  ladies, 
you  cannot,  one  would  think,  longer  indulge 
in  this  practice  of  joking  upon  the  subject. 
The  grand  reason  why  the  practice, is  socofj* 


288  YOUNG  LADY'S  AID. 

mon,  is,  that  you  do  not  reflect,  do  not  con- 
sider how  unbecoming  the  practice  is,  and 
how  great  the  evil  consequences  that  result 
from  it. 

But  why,  you  may  ask,  do  I  speak  to  ladies, 
so  particularly,  upon  this  subject? — is  it  not 
a  practice,  in  which  gentlemen  sometimes  in- 
dulge ?  It  is  true,  I  answer,  that  this  prac- 
tice does  prevail,  sometimes  and  to  some  ex- 
tent, among  gentlemen.  But  it  does  not  pre- 
vail to  the  same  extent,  in  the  one  case  as  in 
the  other.  And  it  usually  originates  with  la- 
dies. At  least,  if  some  weak  minded  gentle- 
man should  in  any  case  introduced  such  sub- 
jects, the  conversation  upon  them  will  not  be 
kept  up  without  the  assistance  of  the  ladies.  I 
would  than  entreat  you,that,  as  you  value  your 
own  characters,  as  you  regard  the  happiness  of 
those  with  whom  you  may  associate — and  as 
you  would  elevate  and  improve  the  social  in- 
tercourse of  the  community — you  would  care- 
fully avoid  this  unbecoming  practice. 

END. 


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